jmanx

My heart hurts right now, I just can't make it go away.  I can help other people and make them feel better but my own heart still hurts.  It feels like it's burning.  An unquenchable fire in my chest eating me alive from the inside.  I can never have the one I love, and the ones I want and love never want me back.  But I'm a fool who can't help feeling that way.
Whenever someone needs help, when they are hurting and feel bad, I'm always there.  I imagine it like I'm sucking out the poison when I talk to them, I take it all out and they're all better again.  Unfortunantly I've taken in all the poison now, and it's me who hurts instead.  But I don't show it, never can, cause if I do they'll stop coming to me for help, and they'll end up staying hurt, I can't do that.  And the poison never kills me, never is able to stop me.  It hurts like hell and only stirs up the burning inside, but I'd

My mind is suddenly ripped from it's dreaming to the sun exploding into my room, blinding my eyes and I try to adjust from the sheer darkness of my mind's eye to the brilliant ray of light screaming their way into my retinas. A battle of wills ensues, my brain, in all its infinite wisdom is telling my body that it must move. It sends messengers along the whole nervous system with the urgent news that they must begin firing and moving. That there is simply no option to not comply. The body however has a mind of its own. Like a peaceful protest against crimes against human rights it refuses, it stays put, giving an indignant finger to the wills and purpose of the brain. This monstrous beast of flesh and muscle has finally done what I'd always feared, it has realized that it does not need to bend to the will of some small fragile gray matter that does nothing but send out commands. It has taken on a will of it's own, and it has, by simply doing nothing, shown that it is now it's own maste