Disney Controversy Meme

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Also dedicated to fellow Disney buffs here on DA:

 

True to the title, this is a Disney Controversy Meme.  Which means I’ve already got every weapon at Disney’s disposal aimed at the haters:  The Powers of Hell, the Black Pearl, the Sorcerer’s Hat and perhaps the greatest of Disney’s weapons—Code Red.

 

FAVORITE MOVIE:  Aladdin

This movie is a lot of fun, at least compared to its contemporaries like Beauty and the Beast or The Little Mermaid.  Credits go to Alan Menken for the music, Tim Rice for the better part of the lyrics, Eric Goldberg and Andreas Deja for designing Genie and Jafar and Robin Williams and Gilbert Gottfried for voicing the two characters that make this film—and subsequently, the rest of the franchise—a real ball.

 

DESPISED MOVIE:  Belle’s Magical World

Third time’s a charm, right?  Not in this case.  Say what you will about The Enchanted Christmas, but we can all agree that this is the straw that broke the camel’s back.  It’s heavy on the moral preaching and clearly lousy on the animation.

 

FAVORITE CHARACTER:  Genie  (Aladdin)

Whether it be Robin Williams, Dan Castellanetta or James Monroe Igleheart, this blue character knows how to make things fun for us to see.

 

DESPISED CHARACTER:  Hildy Gloom  (The 7D)

While I do find the show more enjoyable than Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, as far as villains go, the 1937 film had the edge.  There, we had a cold, calculating tyrant who’d stop at nothing to be the fairest in the land, even at the risk of transforming into a sadistic and more enjoyable hag.

 

What did the show give us?  Sharon Osbourne as a short-tempered, dimwitted whiney.

 

OVERRATED MOVIE:  Frozen

Before you bring your Frenchmen their torches and pitchforks, let me be clear on this—I actually like Frozen.  In fact, for The Volante, I gave it the highest rating of five gold stars.  What makes this film overrated is that I like is as it is—just a movie.  But the rabid fans (cue the Avatar gag) perceive it as the best thing ever made.  (Cue the Picard facepalm gag.)  And it doesn’t help that the popularity of “Let it Go” eclipses that of the movie itself.  If that’s the case, then, to quote the one true boogieman, “there’s something very wrong.”

 

UNDERRATED MOVIE:  The Lion King 1½

I originally wanted to put Maleficent on the category.  I really did.  I’ll admit that it’s rough around the edges, but it’s still worth watching.  But then I remember this midquel to the original Lion King getting a lot of flack simply because it destroys the canon by saying that they caused the animals to bow during the “Circle of Life” sequence or to collapse from the “Can’t Wait to be King” tower.  If the research is correct, this is based on Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead, a parody of Shakespeare’s Hamlet, one of the main sources of The Lion King, so I don’t think this is SUPPOSED to be canon.  Deep thinking aside, this is still a very funny film—sometimes hilarious.

 

OVERRATED CHARACTER:  Snow White

Fairest in the land?  Sure.  Anything else?  Apart from being a mother to the dwarfs, no.  With the exception of Cinderella, the princesses conceived during Walt’s lifetime don’t have much of a personality, much less enough of it.

 

UNDERRATED CHARACTER:  Merida

Okay, what’s with the hate?  Is it her rebellious streak?  Well, if that were so, then the blame is on the parent, not the child.   Queen Elinor is a noble and dignified person, sure, but it is her obsession for tradition has made her insufferably naïve and stubborn.  Besides, unlike any of the other Disney Princesses, this gal accomplished her goal from beginning to end without the help—or need—of a guy, which is why I’m not so keen on Jarida (Merida x Jack Frost) or even Merricup (Merida x Hiccup).  She is the brand’s most flawed, and therefore most believable.

 

FUNNIEST MOMENT:  “For the last time, we did not order a giant trampoline!”  (The Emperor’s New Groove)

I could call the whole of The Emperor’s New Groove the funniest moment, but this is the first thing on the top of my mind.  The very spoof of the traditional way for Disney villains to die.  Besides, Photoshop could not find the “Tell us where the talking llama is” image compatible.

 

SADDEST MOMENT:  Feed the Birds  (Mary Poppins)

Irwin Kostal’s score in this song is bittersweet, with a few light notes.  But the majority of it is very heavy and some cues have a genuine choir!  The song becomes even stronger in the instrumental “Mr. Banks Gets Disbanded”.  It’s a pretty grim contrast to all the light things we’d gone through before (“Jolly Holiday”, “Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious”) and afterwards  (“Chim Chime Cher-ee”, “Step in Time”.)

 

FAVORITE SONG:  Friends on the Other Side  (The Princess and the Frog)

Prior to the movie, I could hear the voice of Keith David anywhere—as a narrator, as a gargoyle, as a few villains.  However, not one of them struck me as suggestive of his musical talents.  And daaaaaamn, was he a good one!

 

DESPISED SONG:  I Want the Good Times Back  (The Little Mermaid)

It’s essentially Ursula singing “Hello, Dolly”.

 

Ursula.

 

The Sea Witch.

 

Singing “Hello, Dolly”.

 

A style and tone that are not at all compatible with “Poor Unfortunate Souls”.  It’s a song that makes better sense on a less threatening villain, like Captain-Hook-or-Prince-John levels of silly.

 

FAVORITE PRINCESS:  Meg  (Hercules)

She was a princess in the original Greek myth, so she counts.  All the other Disney princesses feel like they need a guy or an adventure, but this gal goes “No, thank you” on both of them.  Kudos goes to Susan Egan for bringing that kind of spunk to life.

 

DESPISED PRINCESS:  Aurora  (Sleeping Beauty)

Okay, “despised” is a strong word, but her blandness still rubs me off the wrong way.  While Snow White had some personality, she had none.

 

FAVORITE VILLAIN:  Dr. Facilier  (The Princess and the Frog)

I said this once, and I’m going to say it again:  Keith David.  That sly, crafty little serpent…

 

DESPISED VILLAIN:  King Stefan  (Maleficent)

Remember when I said that the film is rough on the edges?  That means that I still like it, though it still has some big faults.  And the recharacterization of King Stefan is the biggest slight.  I can’t commend them for turning a kind, much-concerned monarch into the royal madman.  One Scar is enough, thank you very much.  (And don’t get me started on Loki’s popularity!)  Also, he was portrayed to be Maleficent’s original lover (no problem there), only to betray her by ripping off her wings (oh, boy.) which in turn renders her evil.  (What, was Chernabog too full on his hands to make the deal himself?!)