Literature
The Loud House: Keeping It Family
[Scene opens with Lincoln Loud standing in the living room, facing the camera directly. He looks serious, arms crossed.]
Lincoln: (straight to camera)
Hey everyone, it’s me, Lincoln Loud. I know a lot of you out there are fans of the show, and… look, I gotta be real with you for a second.
Most of the fan stuff out there is awesome. But there’s this one thing that keeps popping up that’s just… gross. A lot of fans want me to get into these weird incest relationships with my sisters. They even have a name for it now — “LoudCest.”
[Lincoln makes a disgusted face.]
Lincoln:
That’s not happening. Ever. This is The Loud House, not the Game of Thrones house. We’re a normal, chaotic, loving family — not whatever that is.
[He pulls out a sheet of paper with the words “INCEST” and “NSFW” written in big bold letters. His expression turns narrow and dead serious. He holds it up to the camera for a beat, then dramatically throws it off-screen.]
Lincoln:
We would never do anything like that. This is
