TanakaTheRose

Author's Note: The following is a full-length version of Lockers and Losers, a TTRPG style wedgie story that was played through journal entries on my profile. Every entry was accompanied by options of where to go next, the audience voted for their favorite option, and then I rolled a d20 to see how effective that course of action was. Thank you to everyone who participated! Lockers and Losers by Magni 0 A white light unlike anything you've seen before. The sensation of falling makes your whole body jolt, and you open your eyes to see a night sky, but even that sky is wrong. It's a faint purple color, with dark blue splotchy clouds like ink clouds billowing in a water glass. As you blink the sleep out of your eyes, you look around. You appear to be laying on gray stone. There are no walls, so you're able to see golden lights below. You're atop some kind of tower. You turn your head, trying to understand your surroundings. There's a smeared silver bell as big as an elevator hanging

Wedgie Witch: Convergence by Magni The rumors about Armstretch Penitentiary were concerning. For starters, the guards were given a lot of leniency when it came to how they interacted with inmates. This may sound like the guards have too much power, but on the contrary, it was reported that five Armstretch guards in the last year ended up on leave after being overpowered by inmates and being subjected to horrific wedgie sessions, titty-twisters from hell, and swirlies that sounded so abhorrent that they were often redacted on the reports. It was also rumored that the warden spent too much time golfing to properly run his facility. This meant that prisoners spent too much time out of their cells, and too much time fighting each other. Which led to the final, most worrisome rumor: an escape plan was being hatched at that very moment. There were three attempts and one successful escape in the last year, with one woman—her name was Alice Rosemary or Rippons or something like that—back

4 “Never did I mean to Imprison you Here in my garden Like I am imprisoned” A bully’s knuckles tapped against the library doors, “Open up! We know you’re in there!” The Kalypso Academy library was about the size of the gymnasium, and you could feel it. There were two floors, the first floor consisting of wide open study areas with plenty of tables and then rows of dusty, leather-filled bookshelves kept under a cramped ceiling that glowed under dim golden light. The second floor was more like a balcony that formed a square around the perimeter of the room with a railing looking down over the study area. The doors were elegantly designed mahogany with large windows in each panel, matching the regal aesthetic of the main hall and not at all fitting with the regular high school aesthetic anywhere else. It was like putting an 1800’s porcelain doll into a Batcave playset. One door opened for the bullies, and a very tall girl with dark purple hair stepped out to greet them. Their

2 “I've lost my goddamn mind It happens all the time I can't believe I'm actually Meant to be here Trying to consume The drug in me is you And I'm so high on misery Can't you see!” Here’s the thing about Tanya Lyons: Tanya was fast. Surprisingly so for the short girl that she was. Barely over five feet, Tanya darted through the hallways like a wild rabbit pursued by wolves (but of course the trio of bullies nicknamed the Wolves were off elsewhere probably torturing someone else). Only a few people knew it, but Tanya had been trained by her older sister in the ways of evasion. She managed to dodge bullying sessions throughout the hallway, ducked under the outstretched arm of another bully trying to grab her, and took such sharp turns that other bullies might have been fooled into wondering where she went. Indeed, Tanya was fast. But she wasn’t faster than the bullies on the track team, and it was only a matter of time before two runners in the group managed to catch her. It was

Kalypso Academy Battle Royale By Magni Author’s Note: Thanks so much for 2,500! >W< 1 “One minute I held the key Next the walls were closed on me And I discovered that my castles stand Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand.” You can’t judge a book by its cover. Remember that, it’ll be important later. For example, see that goth girl over there? The one who looks like she’s allergic to color? She’s wearing rainbow unicorn panties. Yeah, she says they make her feel cute. Don’t ask me how I know that. And just like the goth girl with rainbow panties, you can’t judge Kalypso Academy for what it looks like. To most people, it might look like some refined building on an acclaimed college campus, but some students inside would describe it more like a prison. The trees at the edge of campus are like guard towers, our classrooms are like tight cells, and of course if you don’t have a clique to protect you, there will be consequences. What else, what else… oh, the bathrooms! They’re