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About Varied / Hobbyist Colin Dobrilovic HoltMale/United States Groups :iconweapons-n-arms: Weapons-N-Arms
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Deviant for 4 Years
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Statistics 372 Deviations 3,001 Comments 28,895 Pageviews

Newest Deviations

The Beast (Gift for RMCreeps) by IronBroFst The Beast (Gift for RMCreeps) :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 2 2 The Marauder (updated design) by IronBroFst The Marauder (updated design) :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 8 0 (Art Trade) Bucking Magnifico by IronBroFst (Art Trade) Bucking Magnifico :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 7 2 Shield of the Glutton by IronBroFst
Mature content
Shield of the Glutton :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 6 0
I'd like to introduce you to my Religion. by IronBroFst I'd like to introduce you to my Religion. :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 7 1 Mothman by IronBroFst Mothman :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 9 6 L-MNT Blade Marc-II by IronBroFst L-MNT Blade Marc-II :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 9 2 The Thing That Should Not Be (NEMH) by IronBroFst
Mature content
The Thing That Should Not Be (NEMH) :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 19 5
Acres of Ash by IronBroFst Acres of Ash :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 6 0 Dreams Amoungst the Void by IronBroFst Dreams Amoungst the Void :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 6 0 Cat of Golden Sands by IronBroFst Cat of Golden Sands :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 4 3 I Need a Vacation by IronBroFst I Need a Vacation :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 3 2 Red Eyed Kid/Slug Demon by IronBroFst Red Eyed Kid/Slug Demon :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 4 0 Pirate Weapons by IronBroFst Pirate Weapons :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 14 6 Viking Weapons by IronBroFst Viking Weapons :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 11 0 The Book of the Dead by IronBroFst The Book of the Dead :iconironbrofst:IronBroFst 9 0


Horns by Matsu-sensei Horns :iconmatsu-sensei:Matsu-sensei 253 23 Marina by Ruff-Sketches Marina :iconruff-sketches:Ruff-Sketches 803 20 The Hunt by Valentina-Remenar The Hunt :iconvalentina-remenar:Valentina-Remenar 3,765 268 Peril on the Sea by korintic Peril on the Sea :iconkorintic:korintic 329 24 Character design by korintic Character design :iconkorintic:korintic 402 25 Sentry by korintic Sentry :iconkorintic:korintic 67 0 Skyedge by NeonBlacklightTH Skyedge :iconneonblacklightth:NeonBlacklightTH 7 1 Character Commission by LoulouVZ Character Commission :iconloulouvz:LoulouVZ 103 2 Skyrim Dawn guard by bluerainCZ Skyrim Dawn guard :iconblueraincz:bluerainCZ 105 2 Chocolate Elves of Skyrim by QuizzicalKisses Chocolate Elves of Skyrim :iconquizzicalkisses:QuizzicalKisses 701 23 Skyrim - Fishing manually by IsisMasshiro Skyrim - Fishing manually :iconisismasshiro:IsisMasshiro 613 136 Skyrim: Technodovaking! by DoctorGurgul Skyrim: Technodovaking! :icondoctorgurgul:DoctorGurgul 535 34 skyrim speed by agentfox skyrim speed :iconagentfox:agentfox 788 38 Skyrim Cuties by ghostfire Skyrim Cuties :iconghostfire:ghostfire 3,722 391 Skyrim by fcotriggs Skyrim :iconfcotriggs:fcotriggs 1,300 174 skyrim oc by Silsol skyrim oc :iconsilsol:Silsol 707 59


Hey y'all, it is me...
Just a status update to let you guys know I'm still alive, despite me not posting anything as of recent... The truth of the matter is, I have a life outside of this platform, and it is REALLY hammerin' down on me! Ranging from the fact that I'm in College now, to me trying to get a drivers license, to me trying to get a job. (not to mention some of the more emotional subject I won't get into...) When I find the time to, I'll definitely post more stuff for you guys, you all have been great followers, and I owe you guys... Hope to talk to you guys soon!

You wake up out of bed, get a shower, get dressed, eat breakfast, and head out into the world to do whatever it is you must do to keep the cogs in the clock of time forever moving. Be it school, or work, you must repeat this process for as many times as humanly capable. You've done it before, countless times, what's stopping you today? Well...It's the realization that what you are doing, at this current moment, could mean nothing in the far, and distant future. You have dreams of accomplishing great things once you get out of High School, and get that college degree you've worked so hard for. But what would it all amount to? 

I feel this way right now.

I've worked tirelessly to get myself onto the Honor Roll, something that has never happened to me before. And now that constant stress of trying to stay on it is only adding to my anxieties. It gets to a point where it has robbed me of the one thing I enjoy doing most. Art. I'm not going to incorporate things like Algebra, or Fractions, or freaking chemistry to my everyday life. I would be making it big with ideas that flow from my brain to my fingers. I'd be sitting at a desk for hours, drawing courageous, war-hardened heroes, going toe to toe with horrid abominations from other worlds. I'd be writing, drawing, and occasionally, acting them out in my head. But the everyday grind of waking up, learning trivial things, getting a grade for said trivial thing, and trying to keep it as high as you can gets strenuous, and the ungodly thought of you getting anything, ANYTHING lower than a B- weighs heavy on the mind! You have to keep that grade up! Otherwise you won't go to the college you want, you won't get the job you want, you'll be near penniless, your family will disown you, and you'll become a worthless sack of human excrement for the world to mock and berate! 

It's gotten to a point, where I do get a break, I don't feel like doing anything.
All I want to do is just lie on my couch, or my bed, and just whither away from the inside out.
I no longer have the motivation to pick up a pencil and use it for my own purposes. 
Not to solve equations that look like some long forgotten alien language. Not to write a summary on some product of literature. No, I want that pencil to dance. I want it to make complicated shapes, and patterns. I want it to make complex characters, and fascinating creatures. I want play God, and create my own world!

But I've been feeling like I can't. 
I couldn't find the time.

It's gotten to a point where I've been told to stop taking my drawing stuff all together, and to focus on work...
It's also gotten to a point where I don't even want to look at a pencil anymore, and the art I AM doing ALSO feels like work!

I don't want to feel like this anymore...
I don't want to feel like the world is breathing down my neck, waiting for me to slip up.
I don't want to feel like I can't do anything anymore.
And I don't want to feel like my art is a chore!

If anyone, ANYONE knows how to get out of the metaphorical hole that i have dug myself into, please, say something.
I need all the help I can get right now...


IronBroFst's Profile Picture
Colin Dobrilovic Holt
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United States
Likes : Drawing, Gaming, Rock (classic, to metal), other artists (they give me inspiration) and fantasy weaponry

Dislikes : ...bad games, bad music (can't get more precise than that)


Add a Comment:
Bbaltierra Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2019  Student General Artist
Hi there
IronBroFst Featured By Owner 6 days ago  Hobbyist General Artist
hey bud
how are ya?
Ayumi115 Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2019  Student
Thanks for the fav!:) (Smile) 
IronBroFst Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2019  Hobbyist General Artist
you're welcome
mushrooms14 Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2019  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks for the fave!
IronBroFst Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2019  Hobbyist General Artist
you're welcome
Amebr Featured By Owner Dec 19, 2018
Hey how’re you
IronBroFst Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2019  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm doin' alright
I'm still Alive
even though this profile says otherwise
Koleyl Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2018
Thanks for the watch
IronBroFst Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2018  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you guys!
I'm sorry for the Inactivity recently
Add a Comment: