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SPELLING LIST OF SHAME
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1. Occurred

Giving 5 DA points for insults
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Why Grandma Call? Was driving home from Grandmas with Mom (oh yes see the couple pictures I took of Lovinity at Grandmas... I have thumbs at the bottom here)... and I decided to be a dick... I rolled down the window as we passed the golf range and shouted, with a high pitch granny voice, "FORE... SKIN!". Then when we passed by the park I yelled, again in Granny voice, "I'm hung like a horse!".

Ahh the joys of being a dick... sometimes. And hey I'm a guy so I'm an even bigger dick because of that.

Okay, Lovinity pictures:

S0004 LovinityIdeySpringTulips WATERMARKED by infinitelove143
S0005 LovinityTulipsBloom WATERMARKED by infinitelove143

Now, update on the whole sexual thing:

Well... I'm not getting any more confident than the first time a few days or so ago I started talking about this... BUT... I'm learning quite a bit of things lately doing research (and no I don't mean that kind of research ;) ). Plus, I have a small idea of where to go from here, although it's not quite that step people have been wanting me to take. I'm still holding back on... well maybe not holding back completely... but I'm not going to do the opposite of my fear which is what is claimed to be the cure to fear. Sorry. It isn't going to happen. But what I can do for now is get more info... and just to talk, like I've been doing lately. Then once I feel like I know enough, I might try to sweep everything back into the safe box until another time... because let's be honest. I fear. There's no counter-fear in this case... well there is but there's so so much danger and disrespect and moral sin involved... so... sorry... not going to make any moves.
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:icondeathstardances:
DeathStarDances Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013
just a note being a guy doesn't make you a dick acting like s dick does. besides what you did. I wouldn't class as Dickery (no it's not a real word but everyone understands what I mean when I use it and I like it) I'd class that as silliness ^-^ no one got hurt, maybe a couple of people would have mumbled 'darn kids' but really there's no harm... I suggest something more creative next time though ;)

also doing the opposite of your fair is hardly the cure for fair... generally you have to face them head on or expose yourself to your fair a little at a time. but no matter how you manage to deal with your fear putting it off will only make it worse.
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:iconinfinitelove143:
infinitelove143 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
"just a note being a guy doesn't make you a dick acting like s dick does."

I know haha I was making a joke XD

"I suggest something more creative next time though"

...more creative? Like what? Water gun out the window haha?

"also doing the opposite of your fair is hardly the cure for fair... generally you have to face them head on or expose yourself to your fair a little at a time."

Sorry the way you put it was what I actually meant... sorry for the confusion.

"but no matter how you manage to deal with your fear putting it off will only make it worse."

That's why I'm hoping that some how some way I can find a way to at least begin to over come it. No luck yet. :/
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:iconsourair:
SourAir Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I HATE that word.. 'occurred'... *Checks to see if I spelled it right*
I always spell 'experiment' wrong for some reason too.. -_-
Good luck, with everything! :)
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:iconinfinitelove143:
infinitelove143 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you !
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:icongalm03:
Galm03 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
XD what a jerk!

and... Sexual stuff? >_> that's not supposed to be private?
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:iconinfinitelove143:
infinitelove143 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
"XD what a jerk!"

Who's a jerk? Hehe ^^

"and... Sexual stuff? >_> that's not supposed to be private?"

Well... it isn't "supposed to be" private and also it isn't "supposed to be" public. The reason I'm publicly talking about this is to get feedback from other people. When I used to conceal this fear from everyone, nothing happened... the fear kept growing and growing... but once I finally broke that free... even though the fear is still there, at least I can learn what to do from others (now I need to find a way to get confidence).
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:icongalm03:
Galm03 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
can you tell me about that fear in notes, or something? >_> i might help... Maybe...
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:iconinfinitelove143:
infinitelove143 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I have a journal about it... oh wait sorry I think I deleted it.

Long story short, I'm afraid of expressing intimacy, sexuality, or affection, even though on the inside I am a very affectionate person and intimate moments would make me melt.

Note when I say "intimacy", I don't mean just sexual intimacy.
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:icongalm03:
Galm03 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
i know, i know. o_o if you want, just note me
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:iconmandyb82:
MandyB82 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013
(Lol fore-skin)


I think you're doing the right thing...going at your own pace and doing what feels right to you. I'm proud of you :).
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:iconinfinitelove143:
infinitelove143 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
"(Lol fore-skin)"

Yup we also do "Fore-Play" and "Four-Some". XD

"I think you're doing the right thing...going at your own pace and doing what feels right to you. I'm proud of you ."

Thank you :) ...although I often have that feeling I'm holding things back but... hm... who's to know? All I know is to not rush things or anything.
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:iconmandyb82:
MandyB82 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013
:giggle:

I think it's important to do what feels right to you. It's not good to rush these things (like you said). This is sensitive stuff, ya know. It's important to make sure you feel comfortable when you decide to share something :).
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:iconinfinitelove143:
infinitelove143 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
It is very sensitive stuff... that's why I'm too afraid to do anything about the fear :/
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:iconmandyb82:
MandyB82 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013
:huggle: I'm not exactly sure what to do about the fear either...but you have my support 100%.
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:iconinfinitelove143:
infinitelove143 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you much Mandy!
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:iconmandyb82:
MandyB82 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013
You're always welcome :huggle:
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