Spider-Rhodes: Venom Issue #1.

"Eyes. Lungs. Pancreas. So many snacks, so little time." We said to the nameless thug. He's just a drug dealer, so no one will miss him.

Flash doesn't like the feasting, but he can get over it. Anyways, we just lick the face of the scum and punch a hole through his chest, exposing his rib cage and insides to the outside.

"Here's Venom!" We shout snarkily as we peer through the hole.

We are lethal protectors. We are the vicious guardians of Canterlot.

Oh. He's right on time. The self-righteous "hero" of Canterlot. The Spider-Man and his brand of nonlethal justice. We salivate a lot, but we drool even more when we fantasize about killing Spidey.

We want to eat both his arms and then both of his legs and then we will eat his face right off of his head. He will be this armless, legless, faceless thing, won't he? Rolling down the street like a turd in the wind.

We sneak up on him and enjoy his inability to detect us. Over-reliance on Spider-Sense is gonna bite your DAMN HEAD OFF!

We grab his neck and slam him into a wall. Well, more THROUGH it, if we're being honest.

We let him get back up and we smirk at our work. He doesn't have a chance at all. We know his predictable moves.

He'll pull his punches. WE won't.

We hammer him HARD with haymakers and reverse chokeslams.

We use our tendrils to rip his suit and asphyxiate him.

Then we feel the stinging of a Taser. Taser webs, huh? That's new. We release him and try to get our breath back.

Now, we can handle his initial webs, but when he doesn't stop his assault, we get overwhelmed and get pissed off.

We let out a scream of primal rage and murder. He backs up and swears to fix us.

"We're going to rip your goddamn throat out, Spider!" Not an idle threat, we can assure you of that.

With a single flex, we break the webbing and pounce him, razor-sharp claws ripping and equally sharp teeth gnashing at him.

"Dude! Breath mint!" He quips. GOD, we hate his jokes.

He gets leverage enough to escape us and takes off. We don't mind a good chase provided WE win.

The church. He wants to end this where it began. Fat chance.

We tackle him out of the air and onto the ground. First we hit a car and then we hit each other.

He does whatever it takes to stop us. Almost anything. He's getting tired, but won't back down. He's going to fight until he's dead and maybe he'll still fight  at THAT point, too.

In a way, we respect that. His determination is respectable. He fights with nothing held back. Admirable but foolish.

He hasn't suffered enough yet so we leave him beaten and bloodied. He won't escape our judgment. No one does.

End.