The Loud House: Dumbing it Down

Lincoln: Out of all of my ten sisters, Lisa is a special case.

Lisa: (suddenly runs out of her room with a fuming potion) Scatter! She's gonna blow! (it blows up) I'm still alive!

Lincoln; She graduated from college at age 4. 4 years! That's kindergarten age! That's pretty special, I'd say. I can't imagine how she must feel to have such an honor.

Mr. Loud: Kids! Dinner! (the Loud kids go downstairs for dinner, but Lisa arrives a little later)

Lori: Where's Lily?

Lisa: Lily will be down shortly. (suddenly sloshing noises are heard as Lily tumbles down the stairs, her swollen diaper cushioning her fall, giggling all the way)

Lily: Poo-poo.

Luan: Holy cow-pie! That is one big cow pie!

Lana; Whoa! Even I didn't fill my diaper that much.

Leni: Is it me, or does Lily's diaper seem... fuller than usual?

Lincoln: Lisa, what did you do?

Lisa: All I did was invent something to help cut back on changing Lily's diapers. It runs on the same principle as a balloon filling with water. I call it, "The Expand-o-Potty". (everyone glares at her) Don't worry, all you have to do is change her every day and everything will be fine.

Mrs. Loud: Oh, Lisa, honey, I think this is a little unnecessary.

Lola: Plus, it's kind of grody.

Mrs. Loud: Maybe this should be a one-time thing. Or better yet, I bought some clean new diapers for Lily in case we run out.

Mr. Loud; Now honey, you can't beat efficiency. Put her up on the high chair, Lincoln.

Lincoln: Sure thing, Dad. (lifts Lily up) Okay, Lily, let's-- (however, her diaper is weighing her down) Hey, girls, a little help here. (the Loud sisters, except Lisa lift the diaper up) Careful, it might spill out!

Lisa; Hardly. I used a sealant on it so the excrements wouldn't leak out. (Lily poops in the diaper again, and the smell makes them freeze) Speaking of which, we'd better change the diaper now. Don't worry, I made plenty.

Lincoln; Okay. This shouldn't take too long.

(Half an hour later...)

Lisa: (most of the family comes out smelling like Lily's diaper) In my defense, I installed sprinklers into the ceiling to spray a solution powerful enough to clean the room in case something like this happened. You remember what happened when Clyde and Lincoln had--

Mr. Loud: I think we've had enough of your science for one day. Now march yourself to the kiddie table.

Lisa: (sighs) Yes, Dad. Hairless ape, 1: science, 0.

Mrs. Loud: Honestly, Lisa, you know we love you, but sometimes I wish you didn't graduate so quickly.

Luan: That would've been in-genius. (laughs) get it? (everyone looks at her) Sorry.

(After dinner)

Lucy: (Lisa is picking at the last of her meal when Lucy appears next to her) Are you all right, Lisa?

Lisa: AHH! Oh, hello, Lucy. (sniffs) I've noticed the lack of pungent odor on you.

Lucy: There was no way I was going near that mess. You seem pretty sad.

Lisa: Well, Lucy, it's a heavy burden being the only genius in the family. (sighs) What I wouldn't give to have one day where it doesn't mess up the family's life.

Lucy: Hmm...

Leni: Talk about coincidence! Lisa, this is your lucky day, because after Lola gives my newest idea the thumbs-up, there will be a new genius in the house!

(In Lola and Lana's room)

Lola: (Leni is holding up her bra) Your... bra?

Leni: Don't be fooled. It can't only be half of girls' undies-- (pretends to wear it like a necklace) It could also be a stylish necklace... (pretends to wear it like a purse) A patch-up for your purse; a handy-dandy parachute for your favorite action dolly-- you know the kind, where it looks like a doll, but is something more--

Lola: I get it, Leni, but maybe Lisa could give you some ideas.

Leni: You're right, Lola, I oughta help Lisa around more.

Lisa: (witnessing the whole thing, gets an idea) Hmm...

(The next morning)

Lincoln: Ah, another beautiful, yet noisy morning in the Loud House. We're just waiting on Lori.

Lori: (comes down with the keys) Wait... where's Lisa?

Lincoln: Yeah, she has that big presentation today!

(the other Loud children head up to Lisa's room)

Lori: Would you hurry up, Lisa? Seriously, I thought it was a hassle to get Lincoln out the door in the morning.

Lisa: (the door bursts open) YOU! (her siblings gasp) I know you! (they stand confused at Lisa) What are you guys doing in my room?

Lincoln: Uh... first of all, we're not in your room. Second, we need to get going. You have a big presentation at the university.

Lisa: University? Why didn't anyone tell me?! I would've bought one of those months ago! (the others are boggled by this statement)

Leni: Um... you're giving a speech at the college? (Lisa blinks) A big school? (Lisa blinks again) Remember your diploma? (shows Lisa the diploma)

Lisa: Ohh... well, if I graduated college when I'm this young, and I'm giving a speech there, then I must be a super-duper genius!

Lana: Okay, something's definitely wrong here.

Luna: Yah, normally Lisa doesn't wake up this stupid.

Luan; Normally, I can tell when people are joking, and this doesn't sound like a joke.

Lori: (reads a note on Lisa's desk) "Play me"? (presses a button and a holographic projection appears)

Lincoln: It's a hologram Lisa!

Hologram Lucy: Boo.

Hologram Lisa: AHH! How did that get in here?! (Hologram Lucy disappears) Phew. Good morning, siblings. If you are viewing this message, then it must indicate you've noticed my current behavior. Well, let me explain: lately, I've been getting sick of being the genius in the family, as it have been giving me, as well as you, nothing but trouble, so I've drained my intelligence to an average level, similar to you. Now you may be asking, what if I don't like it? It's simple, really; I just reverse the polarity of the electron counterbalances in my invention and become a genius all over again.

Lori: (sees a machine that looks like a dentist's chair with a wired helmet attached) This must be the invention. (sees the settings switch) Why is it set to "Leni"? Why is there even a Leni setting?

Hologram Lisa: However, there is a slight chance the machine malfunctioned and set my intelligence to a level similar to Leni's. As I said, it should be reversible, but until then I'm sure you won't miss the old me.

Lori: Well... I suppose it could be worse.

Leni: Yeah, she could've been like-- (gets distracted) Ooh, shiny!

Lisa; Shiny?

Lincoln; Come on, guys! We can't be late!

(Later, at the university)

Professor: And now, fellow scientists, for a presentation for Dr. Lisa Loud. She has developed an experimental formula that she claims will change the lives of a select number of people we may or may not know today. One moment, gentleman, and I will bring in Dr. Loud. (Soon, Lisa is brought out onto the stage, but she just stands there in front of the scientists, then after a while, starts bawling due to her lowered intelligence)

(Later, back at the Loud House)

Leni: (she is seen comforting a whimpering Lisa in front of their disappointed siblings) I know, I know. Lisa didn't actually get stage fright. That's just the result of a failed experiment talking.

Lisa: So many strangers...

Lincoln: And the smart thing to do is to get Lisa back to normal.

Mrs. Loud: Good news, kids. Your father called the university, and they understood the situation, so they decided to move Lisa's presentation to Friday night.

Lincoln: Okay, Mom. (Mrs. Loud leaves)

Lori: Uh, guys, we all literally have tests Friday. How is Lisa suppose to help us study if she's literally like Leni? No offense. (she sees Leni and Lisa are gone) Leni? Lisa? (they hear laughing, and look out at the backyard)

Leni: (she's having fun with Lisa) Don't worry, guys. I'll give her back later so she can help you study!

Lucy: She has a point, you know. (the other Loud siblings yelp) I think somewhere down there is the old Lisa.

Lincoln: You know, Lucy's right. This may not be so bad. (Soon, a montage is shown where Lisa and Leni are having fun with other things, such as interrupting a game of fashion photographer with Lincoln and Lola, trying on Lori's old clothes, turning off Luna's music to focus on hairstyles, and showing equal disgust at changing Lily's diaper)

(Skip ahead to Friday afternoon)

Lincoln: All right, Leni! This has gone far enough!

Leni: What do you mean? (her siblings, sans Lisa show failing papers)

Luna: We flunked out, dude!

Lynn: All F's!

Lana: We got ripped off!

Lori: We literally failed everything!

Lola: Woe is me!

Lucy: I thought Lisa was till in there somewhere...

Luan: But now she's so stupid, it isn't F-unny!

Leni: Me, too. (shows a failing paper) You know, it's my fault. I'm the one who made Lisa get so dumb?

Lynn: (confused) Huh?

Leni: Well, you see, Lisa was at the kiddie table, alone, and--

Lori: Let's just get her back to normal.

(In Lisa's room)

Lori: (Lisa is seated in her invention) All right, Lisa, how does this thing work?

Lisa: ...I don't know.

Lincoln: Actually, I think this switch has something to do with it. (pulls a switch from "Leni" to "Genius" and presses a big button, and the invention zaps her with a jolt of electricity) How do you feel? (Lisa is silent) Lisa?

Lisa; That's Dr. Lisa Loud Ph.D., to you!

Lincoln: She's back! (he and his others sisters, sans Lori, cheer)

Lori: All right, Lisa, we don't have much time. The rest of us have a make-up test, and you have a presentation to make.

(Later, at the university)

Lisa: ...and in conclusion, gentlemen, with this formula, we can indeed help people with irritable bowels. (the scientists, and the Loud Family applauded)

(Back at the Loud House)

Lori: That was a literally fascinating piece of work, Lisa!

Others: Yeah!

Lisa; Yes, Lisa, that was very clever of you. (feigns surprise) Oh, wait, that's me!

Lori: (everyone except Lori laughs) very funny, Lisa. Next time you have to show off an invention of yours, and you make yourself dumber using brain-draining technology, don't come crying to us.

Leni: We missed you, even though Dumb Lisa was a lot of fun. (the Loud sisters go upstairs)

Lincoln: Like I said, Lisa is a special case when it comes to all of my sisters. True, she's a bit of a bore with her inventions and scientific reasoning, but we all love that about her, and now we learned to appreciate her just a little bit more. (The sisters coming screaming down the stairs and outside)

Lisa; Lily got into my formula, and made a massive mess in her Expand-o-Potty! Everyone is expected to steer clear of the area, specifically my room!

Lincoln: But I think we'll start tomorrow. (Lincoln finds Lily without her diaper and carries her outside)

[END]