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Been sick.
Still Sick.
Need to release some creative juices...  So.
I'm going to see how many speed runners I can caricature this week while watching Awesome Games Done Quick 2015.
Don't know how many I'll get, and I already missed the first guy, but I don't have any money and it's the only way I can think of to draw attention to the cause.

Fuck Cancer!
  • Watching: AGQD2015
  • Listening to: Tm9pciBKYXp6
  • Reading: TWFudWFscw==
  • Watching: WW91IGRlY29kZSB0aGVzZSBtZXNzYWdlcw==
  • Playing: VHJhY2ttYW5pYQ==
  • Eating: Q29mZmVlIENhbmR5
  • Drinking: SG90IFRlYQ==
Here's a story
of investigators
who were huddled in a corner all their own.

The were four men
huddled all together
but they were not alone

then the one day when Cthulhu met these fellows
and he knew it was much more than a hunch
that these four men could somehow form a munchie
that's the way they all became Cthulhu's Lunch!

Cthulhu's Luuuuuunch!
Cthulhu's Luuuuuunch!
That's the Wa-aaaaaay they became
Cthulhu's Luuuuuuuunch!
  • Listening to: Big Finish Production's Dr. Who
  • Reading: Child of Doors
  • Watching: behind myself
  • Playing: Trackmania
  • Eating: Pride
  • Drinking: White Coffee
K, this is in response of polycephallic This dude...dudete...artist.
Check out his/her art.  's'awesome.

1. would you rather have no arms or no legs?
No legs.  I need my arms for drawing, hugging, and stabbing motions.

2. what are your most cherished memories?
The first night I spent with my now wife of 5 years.  Jeez, have we been together for 10 years?

3. most surreal or horrific dream/nightmare you've ever had?
In a dilapidated house, there was a rusty cage and we all were stuck in it.  This girl wasn't really holding us hostage, but she didn't set us free.  She ran quickly to the bathroom and vomited blood into a camo-patterned toilet.  Wiping her tears away, she opened the medicine cabinet to find a parcel wrapped in cloth.  Unfolding it, she recoiled in horror at its contents.  A cobra slit down the middle with three babies inside.  The two lower babies had veins surgically rerouted out of their necks and into the mouth of the third baby.

I miss dreams like that.

4. if you were to time travel, would you go into the future or revert back into the past?
Oh, future.  I want to see what everyone does next.

5. imagine your own pet that were two animals combined together creating a hybrid, what would those two animals be? :D (Big Grin)
A cat-cat.  It would be cat colored with cat fur and a cat insides.  The front would be the front of a cat and the back would be the back of a cat.  It would weigh about 20 lbs and love pettings.

Also, Cat.

6. would you ever consider changing your birth name?
I honextly don't care what my name is.  Mike.  Charles.  Grim.  It's all the same.  Just nothing weird like Tiddlywinks Xavier Rojas III Esquire.

7. don't you hate it when a big mystery is never solved?
I LOVE unsolved mysteries.  The best thing in the world is not knowing and acknowledging ignorance.  What is Dark Energy?  Why is matter?  Will the universe rip apart, or is that even possible?

More unknown!

8. weirdest coincidence that has happened to you?
Me and my friend hadn't seen each other in about a year.  When we met, we realized we both wore the same make, model, and size of shoes.


9. would you befriend the elephant man?
Sure, if he's a swell enough guy.  If all he does is talk about how terrible his life is, tho, I have no patience for that.
Either shut up or do something about it.

That said, I wonder if he has a hanker'n for weird fiction.  Love me some weird fiction.

10. name something that bothers you to no end?
People who complain about stuff, but offers not debate or solutions.  All they do is belly-ache.
It's moaning.  Stop moaning and put a little effort into your complaints.  Jeez.

Huh. I gotta ask 10 questions too, for the next guy?
I don't know how to tag people, so this is for whoever.

1.  What's your favorite comic? (Web, book, or otherwise)
2.  How long can you stand to be in a quiet room?
3.  In Pathfinder or RPG terms, how much experience points are you worth?
4,  Who was the last person you told a personal secret too? (you don't have to name names, just how do you know them?)
6.  What is the first thing in your life that your remember?
7.  What's the first thing you would grab if your house were on fire and you needed to evacuate?
5.  How could you do that to your mother?
8.  You and a bear become friends.  What adventures would you go on with it?
9-  What's your favorite death scene in a movie, show, or cartoon?
10.  What do you desire to see tomorrow?
  • Listening to: HPPodcraft
  • Reading: Child of Doors
  • Watching: you through the window
  • Playing: Euro Truck Sim 2
  • Eating: Toothpaste
  • Drinking: blueberry tea
  • Listening to: Ayreon
  • Reading: a thumb print
  • Watching: too many bugs
  • Playing: Talisman
  • Eating: dust
  • Drinking: sleep
.ehca seye ym dna derit m'I  .nam ,onnod I

.gniod m'I kcuf eht tahw rednow ot em ot noitnetta hguone syap enoemos taht epoh driew emoS  .tuoba serac ro swonk eno on taht seiretsym htiw srood ym gnikcol m'I ekiL  .ytirucsbo ni erom dna erom gnidih flesym dnif I )em tuoba swonk eno oN  .ralupop fo etisoppo eht ,yas ot si tahT( ytiralupopnu ym fo htped eht ni ,won nevE  .gnol yrev rof gnihtyna no sucof ot em rof hguot ti sekam ainmosni eht dna emit drah a hguorht gniog m'I ,kooL

.onnod I .gnihtemos ro cimoc rehtona ro...yalp a rof ydaer gnitteg m'I ebyaM  .sdrawkcab gnitirw detrats yltnecer I
  • Listening to: Manny the Martyr
  • Reading: My Palm
  • Watching: The wine cry
  • Playing: Knock-Knock
A response.

First read this:…


Humans, as a general group, tend to lump things into general groups.  I see this all the time and no one sees what I see when they talk about their general groups as if they were single objects.  When we talk about Muslims, we have a picture in our head of what we think he looks like and what he wears.  Why, I ask you, should it not be a girl and why is that girl in your head wearing a face mask.  None of these traits are defined under the Muslim listing in the dictionary.  So, we preassign traits to the groups in our head.  This is known as stereotyping.

Conversations with people can work on many levels, but the Average Joe works with their stereotype  then adds and alters definition of the individual out of the group as s/he learns more.  When I say art, Joe thinks painting.  Then I say Artistic structure, he sees white marble statue.  Then I say Artistic structure made of metal and he sees junk welded together and so on.  As I chisels away his stereotypes, he eventually realizes I'm talking about the masterpiece of a finely crafted car developed in Japan.  This is why, I think, English adjectives precede nouns, to save time brushing away stereotypes ahead of the game.

Speaking of games, what does this have to do with our interactive video-land?  My friend DJKID and I think alike.  When I see a picture, I usually see the brush strokes after the woman they make up.  I'm trained to do so because artistically I put the adjective before the noun in hopes of integrating the work into my own style, weather this be a statue, game, or comic strip.  When I play Tale of Tale's the Path, I see the brush strokes in the programing after I see little girls one their way to grandma's house, but we are not average people, she and I.  Chances are you aren't either, if you're reading this.

Interactive Art is stereotyped into "Games" for the Average Joe.  S/he sees a side-scroller pixel game.  S/he sees Mario.  S/he sees a level progressing left to right, one level at a time, from beginning to end, and in one direction.  Widdle away the idea of interactive art and s/he sees something more akin to Halo, maybe.  "What direction do you go?" s/he asks.  "It's a game, so what's the objective?"  But with interactive art, the objective is to see the brush strokes.  There is no direction.  It's free form.  "What's the fun in that?  How do you win?"  See, Joe doesn't get that you win by enjoying it.  If s/he doesn't enjoy it, it doesn't matter.  S/he'll go play something s/he does enjoy.

But Joe is still going to write a review of what s/he thought of the pointless and aimless game s/he's just played.  "It doesn't go from left to right like I'm used to.  It's a horrible game because there's no point system nor objective.  In essence, you can't win."  Don't blame Joe.  S/he's writing an honest review for other Average Joes.

And to the question of how artsy is too artsy?  That's a complicated issue, but I'm going to say, at least from my own perspective, there is no limit except your own tastes.  Back to "The Path," when I first found out that you get nothing from collecting all the flowers, I laughed hard and loud.  I thought it was the funniest thing I've ever heard.  I remember yelling "You bastards!" before going to collect all the flowers.  Not everyone likes Pepsi, however, so there may have been some hard feelings from their gamers.

Tale of Tales is hardly the only first one's to play little jokes like that on the players.  Ask an old gamer about Neverhood and the Hall of Records, or the Spoony One and the room you can't escape in the Dirty Hairy game.  The room that forces you to reset the system and lose all your progress.

I'm not going to go into why, right now, because this post is long enough, but suffice to say that expressionless art is itself an expression, and is still art.

P.S.  I LOVE the Void.
  • Listening to: Colour talk to me.
  • Reading: the glyphs of action.
  • Watching: the Patriarch preach.
  • Playing: The Void
  • Eating: Amber and Crimson
  • Drinking: Crimson and Amber.
a.  As well as my need to art, I have this complex problem with creating games that no one plays.  I usually lean toward the RPG side, because I miss playing RPGs with college friends.  My problem is that I get tied up with the structure of the system, and lose interest when it comes to the details such as weapons, armor, monsters, etc...

Last night, I had a dream about a card game called Warring Covens.  The structure of the game was layed out before me and it was, for the most part, balanced and did not require thought.  I have the structure.  It's a card game, after all.

The idea of copyright bothers me with this game, because I've no clue where this dream came from.  I'll call it the Aether, for now.  The Aether game me this system that's a gestalt of Magic, Pokemon, Yu-Gi-Oh, and Legend of the Five Rings.

There is no need to mess with the structure of the game, all that is required is the details.

Somewhere, the aether has thrown down a gauntlet.  I have a challenge.  I'm to come up with the cards of the game, the details, the Witched, the Items, The spells, and make a CCG out of it with no thought put to the rules.

This excites and disturbs me at once.  I find myself creating structures of the Witches and the categories of cards, but that's just laying aside the details the Aether wants me to focus on.  What I need are ideas.
  • Listening to: Buke and Gass
  • Reading: Black Orchid, by Rex Stout
  • Watching:
  • Playing: Yu-Gi-Oh: Dualest of Roses
  • Eating: Pork-Chops
  • Drinking: Water
The greatest stumbling block I have tripped over is that of apathy.  That is, a lack of interest.  This is weird, because I've very interested, yet not.  It's more of a lack of passion than apathy, really.  I think every artists must have encountered this.  It's a strange thing, too.  So strange.  Did I mention the word 'strange?'

I'm not sure, but I think it has something to do with feedback, but not entirely.  I have a new blog up about Springhill called In the Red with Kagy:

I seem to be paying more attention to this site than Natch Evil.  Tho, I couldn't stand to be in the room I do my art for a long period of time, but now Kagy has turned into a strange obsession.  Can't stop thinking about her.

Here's the weird thing, tho.  I am currently writing a post on a Deviant Art Site that no one checks, I'm writing a blog on a blogspot that no one checks, and I'm NOT drawing a comic that I get about 100 visitor's a day on.  Yet it's the feedback I crave.  Something I hope will inspire me to make more.  But...I just can't bring myself to that level of Passion I had when I was kicking out two pages a day.

Those were great days.  Two pages each.

Le Sigh.

Well, unfeeling internet masses, continue ignoring for now.  I must be on my way.
  • Listening to: the sighs of my pining
  • Reading: signs of impending dispair
  • Watching: my weight
  • Playing: my cards wrong
  • Eating: enough to fill the hole in my soul
  • Drinking: not enough booze
Exquisite red lightning at the top of the sky, illuminating the inner madness in our society.  It's a split second metaphor for human error.  If you smash your skull matter on the wall, you'd get only a drop of bloody attention on the graphitti riddled side of the internet.  There is not enough gore to please us all.
I want you're attention, like all the other screaming chicks, cheeping for worms to be shoved onto the tongues of our electronic brains.  Keyboards can only translate so much, after all.
Ah well, fuck it, child of Arpa.  And Fuck the screaming.  Information isn't just a drug, a gift of stimulation injected by the cathode hypodermics, it is also a coin we horde and vomit.  I'm sick of the lies, sick to the soul, sick of the twit and the lack of control.  Sick of the signs sick of the friends.  Something's gone wrong.
Ugh, I'm paraphrasing Machines of Loving Grace, again.  I must need more coffee.
  • Listening to: Evil Ben
  • Reading: And Be the Villian, by Rex Stout
  • Watching: Brutal Legend Let's Play
  • Playing: Valthirian Arc
  • Eating: Liquid Insanity
  • Drinking: Coffee
Well, my adventure continues, it seems.  I'm trying to make a living in comics, and we're going to see if I can do it.

I'm in Maryland, now.  I live with my wife's parents, I've just now got internet working, and I've built up at least one issue of Natch Evil.  That's right, I got a 20 page comic...just not printed, yet.

Right now, my game plan is two fold.

1:  Try to sell something.
  I'm hoping to do Art commissions for now, tho I have no idea how to go about that other than blind luck.  I am, however, looking into T-Shirts for Natch and the like.  Research.  And now that I have the net, I have no excuse for not Researching.

2:  Advertisement.  For now, I rely on Project Wonderful.  I need ot update my adds and start a new campaign.

I got my friend Chuck as an adviser.  I'm sure the first thing he'de tell me it to advertise, but I have nothing to sell.  9_9  Why spend money if I have no real product.  Also, he wants me to research some comic called Tomb.  More on that down the line, I guess.

Wish me luck.
  • Listening to: MC Frontalot
  • Reading: Locke and Key
  • Watching: Matt Smith
  • Playing: Legends of Zork
  • Eating: Reality
  • Drinking: Too much whiskey
So, I got my job back and am starting soonnish.  Yay.  Actually, really YAY!

This fixes a lot of problems I had, plus as a bonus, I finished the last comic for a two week back log.  ^_^  Long enough to freak'n get started on Legion Natchian, the last of the House that ____ Built trilogy.  I figure I should return to good ole Saffron afterwards.  Sort of have ideas about finishing her long overdue last book in the Rhymah and Iden trilogy.

Man, I was an idiot not that long ago.  I have, what?  Two unfinished comics?  Ransom is Not Funny stopped in the middle, as did Meat Grinder: A Love Story.  9_9  I might finish Meat Grinder, but probably not Ransom.  Hmmm...

Well, that's not here or there.  Now is the time to just focus on Legion Natchian.  It's gonna be fun to write because I decided at the beginning to put EVERYONE who has a Natchian avatar in my forum in the comic.  Considurring my limit of 35 pages, and wrapping up the story line, this should

*doesn't finish sentence*

So, back into the Work force I go.  Me first senior Excel.  Me first.
  • Listening to: Sims 2 Sound Track
  • Reading: Still on Darkly Dreaming Dexter
  • Playing: God of War 1
  • Eating: Really good tacos.
And so it was told in ancient times, a prophecy that Mike would once again work at the tire factory and it would sap all his strength, Amen.

Hard times ahead (as it is for everyone) but strange hardness than I'm used to.  I got my job back.  Well, it LOOKS like I got my job back, anyway.  Gotta be careful about this one.  Bought new pants to make a good impresstion on in the tire throwing industry.  That's right, Varkmore has a tire factory and I'm going back.  The pay is excelant and they love me there, but it tires me out (no pun in ten did) so doing comics seems a more pain than usual.

There's a difference this time around, however.  I've made extra monies doing comics since they let me go.

Well, I got one week to get myself a backlog and get my shit together.  Need new banners, need to advertise more, need to print off some copies of more prints.  Need to set a routine, like mental programing:
10 Check Forum
20 Check Gmail
30 Check Diviant Artness
40 check Project Wonderful
50 Check paypal
60 go to 10

O_O  I got shit to do fast!

*runs away*
  • Listening to: Lovecraft Reposed
  • Reading: Darkly Dreaming Dexter, again
  • Playing: Shining in the Darkness
  • Drinking: Protean Shake
What keeps Mike up at night?  The thought that he has to saw off his art art the shoulder to make the rent.  Worse yet, the thought occupies me.  Can't sleep anymore.  Insomnia is getting worse each night.

Here's the deal.  No fish are bitting at the shop page and not many commissions, right?  No big deal, I've worked at Jack in the Box before, I can handle this.  I'll just get a job.  Thing is, I've tasted the good life.  I was drawing every day and loving it, thinking I was slowly building up a base to make money off of.  Wow, was I naive.  Now the thing I love, which use to be what I thought was making money, is a liability to me making money.  How can I get a job and draw?  Ugh.

I know.  I'm wining.  I should just suck it up and go get a job already.  WTF is wrong with me?  It's not like I can't draw AND have a part time, but it's just not the same any more.  After you've tasted fine wine, how do you go back to stale beer?  It hurts my brain.  Every time I think about it, I start editing levels in Knytt Stories, read, or play sudoku so I don't have to think about it.

This morning (when I finally got to sleep) I dreamed that I had to sell my soul for money so I could be with Robin and do what I wanted.  $5,800 is apparently the price on my soul.  Why can't dreams be less expressive?
  • Listening to: Knytt Stories OST
  • Reading: Freud for Beginers
  • Eating: Noodles
Well, the tooth is doing good, but not my finances.

I have to get a job, after all.  Hopefully something part time so I can work on the comic still, but if not, I'll have to do them on weekends, or when ever I get a chance.

Project Wonderful got back to me.  I'ma putting adds up pretty soon on the site.  Any extra dough will help, especially with how poor we are right now.  We're losing money like crazy, and it's not because of stupid stuff.  It's 'cuz I'm not making monies.

Still, the fight for making a living doing comics goes on.

Maybe I'll see how much it costs to print up, say, 20 comics of Sol Niger.

New report tomorrow.
  • Listening to: X-BTF OST
  • Reading: Darkly Dreaming Dexter
  • Watching: Harper's Island
Well, shoot.  There's not much to tell you about losing a tooth except it's not too painful, but it's still damn scary.

Apparently I'm not supposed to lean much.  (huh?)  My girlfriend doesn't want me leaning over.  I need to "keep the head elevated" whatever that means.  T_T  Can't draw, then, since I'm always leaning over to see my work up close.  I can still type, tho.

Ugh.  My lack of tooth aches a little this morning.
  • Listening to: Silent Hill Homecoming OST
  • Reading: Darkly Dreaming Dexter
  • Watching: NCIS Season 1
Alright, I was avoiding it, but this really is the best place to talk.

I'm...trying to make a living doing what I love, which is drawing.  Now I have that opportunity, but everywhere I turn I have this sense that I'm SUCH a new comer, despite having drawn for decades.  I'm overwhelmed by the business of it, but it's important that, if I do this, this is the time to do it.

So, I figured I'd make it like a job.  I've set aside time to draw my comic and work on advertising and product blah blah blah.  Ultimately I hope to see Comic for print, but on my terms.  I'm starting to see that's a difficult path indeed.  Ick.

I have decided I'm going to keep you guys informed here on DA of my progress.  Sure I have one of these on my website right under the comic, but I can only update that three or four times a week.  So, here's how I'm doing, world.

I just finished coloring and posting all of this weeks comics (which is what Monday and Tues day are for) and I'm scared as hell.  Not because of the comics, rather today I get my tooth pulled.  I...I don't wanna go get a tooth pulled.  Teeth pulling sounds like something I should dread.  Worse, I have no idea what I'm going to be like the rest of the week.  T_T  Why me?

I'll update you on how that goes.
  • Listening to: Miyu OVA OST
  • Reading: Darkly Dreaming Dexter
  • Watching: NCIS Season 1
Jesus.  How long has i been since I've been on?

I mean it.

Welp.  Nothing to do about it updating again?

*runs away to draw*
  • Reading: Accounting for dummys
  • Watching: Angel for the first time
Here be I in all my Glory,

The most annoying thing in my life is to worship those better than me.
Better in Art?  I can handle that.  No prob.  I got over that in high school when I watch a girl named Anna draw her heart out, and what a heart.  Looking at her artwork made me wanna  beat the shit outta her and eat her brain and heart.  Um…I never did.  I'm not violent by nature.
So…Um…I saw the trailer for SAW (the movie) last night and have been freak'n ever since.  If there's one thing I pride myself in, it's my darkness.

Saw out darked me.  Poo.
That's OK, though.  Here comes Mr. Stabby!

Mister Stabby.  Do-Do da-do do do
Do-do da-do do do
He's Mister Stabby
Mister Stabby, La La La-La la la.
La la La-La la la Laa Laaaaa.
It's a season for change.  I know it.  I can't see, touch, smell, taste, or hear it, but I feel it.  And it's confusing.

I'felt it before, but it made sence at the time.  Switch to Colage, switch to Work, switch jobs.  They were seeds.

These seeds are different.  I can't tell they're golden or brass.  The change in job, the hilights of different departments, the focus, the fat (yes I'm fat now).  They're seeds.

I'm confused, and frightened of them.  Obviously they involve risk this time.  I don't like risk.  My freind, Rick, says the world rewards the risk takers.

And punishes them.

It's a season for change.  Not sure if I like it.