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Harry Potter: Adoptive Kaiju - Chapter 26
Harry, blissfully unaware of the ICW’s decision, eventually found himself on the Hogwarts Express with all the students heading back to the castle after the new year, reunited with Neville, Hermione, and Luna.
Hermione haunted them all with a nightmarish description of being able to hear, but unable to do anything else while petrified, prompting a group hug as everyone tried to comfort her.
According to the rumors, everyone who’d been petrified for longer than a few days needed to be seen by a specialist.
“But then why didn’t they try to wake everyone sooner?” Harry asked, outraged that people had been forced to wait for so long in what amounted to total isolation and sensory deprivation.
“Apparently,” Hermione lowered her voice to a whisper, “As long as no one was genuinely injured, Hogwarts did not have to report the attacks. Most petrification victims don’t remember anything about being petrified, but no one had ever been petrifi
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Harry Potter: Adoptive Kaiju - Chapter 25
Jet Jaguar eventually dropped the comatose basilisk in a deep cavern, then took Harry to the one place he’d been avoiding for years; the Monster Island Research Facility - still under construction, but outfitted with enough equipment to be a proper research lab.
Each time an alien invasion had been thwarted, some of their technology had been recovered, and in the name of security most of it was housed on Monster Island. The general idea was that any thieves would have to risk drawing the ire of the inhabitants, a deterrent that had worked up to this point.
The Xians in particular had parted with a great deal of technology as part of reparations for their attempted conquest of Earth. They still coveted Earth’s water, but since conquest had failed they were quite keen on currying favor - better to have some water and distrust than no water and war.
These thoughts flashed through Harry’s mind and Jet Jaguar’s artificial intelligence as they approached the researche
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Harry Potter: Adoptive Kaiju - Chapter 24
At the announcement that a student was missing, Jet Jaguar stiffened - perhaps not noticeably to most since he was a robot, but he’d been around for enough of Harry’s life that he could tell. As the robot took a step towards the castle Harry started informing him of the year so far and what he’d likely be up against.
After just a few moments, Jet Jaguar stopped to listen to Harry’s abbreviated tale.
Harry’s story of the previous year had been published. Good.
Dumbledore had experienced trouble with the authorities. That was also good.
Hagrid had kept both of his children, Fluffy and Norberta; irrelevant, but good for the man.
Reading between the lines, Harry had a crush. That was a healthy part of growing up, but a reminder that someone needed to sit him down and have the Talk. Unavoidable.
This year’s defense professor was garbage. Not good.
Students had been frozen solid - nearly turned to stone - all year because of a monster. Bad.
The monster was
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Huntresses of Skyrim - Ch.5 - Draugr and Dragon
Known in the other provinces as zombies, the draugr of Skyrim are animated for a wide variety of reasons. Some are victims of long gone necromancers, still patrolling their masters' decrepit domains. Others appear to be willing guardians of ancient temples. And still more are believed to have served the dragons in the distant past and been cursed for their crimes.
Yang launched herself forward and made a quick note that Ruby had as well, going behind the draugr to flank it. Yang's punch hit it directly on the side of its armored face, and the follow-up shot from Ember Celica staggered the ancient monster, but in a display of surprising awareness it moved its greatsword to one side of its head to block Ruby's scythe.
Both huntresses took note of the supernatural frost now creeping down Crescent Rose's edge.
Recovering from the dual attack, the draugr shoved the scythe away with such force that Ruby had to leap over the small creek behind her to avoid falling. Continuing the swi
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Harry Potter: Adoptive Kaiju - Chapter 23
Confined to Gryffindor Tower as he was, Harry still smiled as he read the article.
His memories had apparently been enough evidence to launch a raid on Malfoy Manor, and even to bring a renowned auror (apparently a magical police officer) by the name of Alastor “Mad Eye” Moody out of retirement. From there Dobby had taken the lead, subtly guiding them towards dark artifacts, including a mother load in a magically concealed cellar.
Lucius had apparently slipped an unknowing student (left unnamed for their own protection) a cursed diary that had once belonged to Voldemort, which was enchanted to open the Chamber of Secrets and release the monster within.
Topping it off, Dobby had been freed using an old, little used or remembered law because Lucius had verified under veritaserum that he abused the house elf.
And once freed, Dobby had had revenge. Apparently he’d used his freedom to help interrogate Lucius!
Lucius wasn’t just not a victim of the Imperius c
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Huntresses of Skyrim - Ch. 4 - In the Barrow
Dust is best explained to the layperson as crystallized Magicka, but the truth is more complicated. Magicka comes to Nirn from Aetherius by way of the sun's rays, but Dust comes directly from Nirn itself. There are some who claim that Dust is a manifestation of Nirn's own Aura – the very world's Semblance – but most dismiss this as mere fantasy. However, without a revelation from an Elder Scroll, the truth will remain unknown.
The first thing Yang noticed were the corpses. Not the eons old dead that one might expect, but fresh ones. Mostly skeevers, but there were scattered bandit bodies as well.
The second thing she noticed was the echoing conversation from the other end of the vast chamber.
"The dark elf wants to go on ahead, let him. Better than us risking our necks," said a male voice.
Yang and Ruby did their best to silently move across the chamber. At the pillar in the center Ruby went left and Yang went right to flank the bandits.
"What if Arvel doesn't come
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Huntresses of Skyrim - Ch. 3 - To Bleak Falls
Grimm first appeared either just before or just after the end of the Mythic Era, coinciding with the disappearance of dragons. Most scholars believe that the dragons were their natural predators, and their deaths lead the Grimm to reproduce out of control.
The next morning, Yang was still giggling at Ruby's enthusiasm.
"'Can I have your autographs?' Ruby you are so adorable sometimes!"
Ruby frowned. "When I become a Companion, I'll give people my autograph!"
Yang just laughed harder as she led her sister out of the Bannered Mare.
They had arrived too late to visit the Jarl, so they had spent the night for another ten Septims. On the plus side, despite the city being on lockdown because of a dragon sighting, the guards didn't try to stop them entering.
Walking in the company of the Companions was the best endorsement possible.
In the light of day, Whiterun was a bustling city, filled with people and beautiful wooden architecture, tiled roofs of numerous shades
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Swarming the Multiverse - Smaug Brood
All was silent around the Lonely Mountain. The Desolation of Smaug was an ashen ruin inhospitable to man and beast alike. The Dwarves had long since abandoned their former home, and the men of the Kingdom of Dale had lost their kingdom as well. The old city was silent as a grave, and dead, burnt trees stood as if mourning for it.
But on this night, keen eyes across Middle Earth spotted a shooting star, one that crashed in the heart of the Desolation. The people of Lake Town murmured in fear, wondering if this might rouse the the terrible dragon from his slumber, but the tremors subsided and did not resume, and so their lives went on.
But in the crater something stirred. A fleshy sac burned away, the heat of atmospheric entry having set it ablaze, but as it did so it revealed its precious cargo: a Zerg Hatchery, completely intact and already secreting Creep to consume any organic material nearby. It also began to use what resources it had to spawn Larvae, but where most could not surviv
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Harry Potter: Adoptive Kaiju - Chapter 22
Harry met up with Neville and Hermione the following day, after proving to Madam Pomfrey's satisfaction that his arm had regrown its bones correctly - an arduous task involving a fair amount of dexterity. Apparently the problem was not regrowing bone; it was regrowing it exactly as it had been so it didn't damage any nerves or blood vessels.
"Harry, how's your arm? I hear that Skele-grow isn't the nicest experience."
Harry shrugged, "Good as new, but a little stiff because I couldn't really move it deliberately at all last night. I've been through worse though."
"After last year that isn't an encouraging statement."
Harry laughed at that, replying, "Fair point. But have you heard yet? Colin Creevy got petrified last night!"
Hermione and Neville nodded.
"The school is buzzing with speculation about what happened and what's going to be done about it. People are really worried for their safety."
"Speaking of safety," Harry began, then realized they were still near the hospital wing and un
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Harry Potter: Adoptive Kaiju - Chapter 21
November came, and with it the Quidditch season. Harry's exercise regimen conflicted with practice times or he'd have tried out, but as it was he'd be content with watching the games. He did need to root for the Gryffindor team after all: Malfoy had bought his way onto the Slytherin team with a set of Nimbus Two-Thousand-and-Ones, and Harry felt he could do with a good humbling. He had tried to get Hagrid in trouble last year, to say nothing of the way he spoke about muggleborns all the time.
The match began and Harry immediately picked out the Golden Snitch. He wished that he could communicate that to the Gryffindor seeker, but there was just no way to do so without cheating.
He'd have liked to keep track of it as a challenge, but his senses – trained from years on Monster Island – detected danger, and he instinctively dodged.
An iron ball – the Bludger, Harry remembered – smashed through the bleachers where he'd been sitting just a moment ago.
The audience aro
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One King to Rule Them All Cover by Gojirahkiin One King to Rule Them All Cover :icongojirahkiin:Gojirahkiin 3 0 Further Down the Path to Immortality Cover by Gojirahkiin Further Down the Path to Immortality Cover :icongojirahkiin:Gojirahkiin 0 0 Swarming the Multiverse Cover by Gojirahkiin Swarming the Multiverse Cover :icongojirahkiin:Gojirahkiin 3 0
Huntresses of Skyrim - Ch. 2 - To Whiterun
 The relations between Auras, Semblances, and Magicka are complex. Every living thing is born with at least a drop of Magicka, even if they shun the Cunning Craft. All those with Souls possess Auras – even those with White Souls. However, only those with Black Souls – Man, Mer, the Beast Races, and Daedra – possess Semblances, and one’s Semblance says something about one’s very essence and destiny. The relationships were muddled for so long because there are some Semblances that grant greater power or control over Aura and Magicka.
“Hadvar? What are you doing here?” A blonde, bearded man carefully put down his tools and stepped away from the forge and started approaching. “Are you on leave from–” He did a double take at his nephew’s condition. “Shor's bones, what happened to you, boy? Are you in some kind of trouble?”
"Shh. Uncle, please. Keep your voice down. I'm fine. But we should go inside t
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Kaiju 40,000 - Chapter 7
Mars had seen much by the time of the forty-first millennium. Humanity had terraformed the red planet, then their robots and AIs had rebelled and war had undone all of that work, rendering much of Mars even more inimical to life than it had been before. Still, Mars was the home and headquarters of the Adeptus Mechanicus and humanity's most important forge world, constantly creating vast space-faring vessels and titans to smite the Imperium's enemies, and always sending out its Tech-priests in search of artifacts from before the Age of Strife.
It was not often that were able to find any on Mars.
Yet that was what happened one day, when a great silver beast, like a dragon from ancient Terran legend, but the size of an Imperial Titan, simply appeared one day on the Martian plains.
Some believed that it was a new manifestation of the Machine God. Others believed it was a heretical xeno artifact. Still more believed it was an artifact of Holy Terra, uncovered by the never-ending Martian san
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Kaiju 40,000 - Chapter 6
Rodan did not know where he was, but his instincts screamed that he needed to find as much of his "family" as possible. There were dark and terrible things lurking in the void here. Luckily for the colossal pterosaur, the Immaterium's paradoxical nature meant that it both did and did not have breathable air, and that distances had no true meaning.
These flexible facts combined with the airborne kaiju's natural speed meant that he found most of his family easily, specifically Anguirus, Varan, Baragon, and Manda, all clinging to broken fragments of Monster Island as a human might clutch a life-preserver while lost at sea.
But Rodan was smart enough to realize that in the Warp physics were a great deal more flexible than on Earth. Rodan was strong enough to lift Godzilla in normal Earth gravity; in the micro-gravity of the Immaterium, he was able to tow his fellow kaiju and their anchors together, and his grounded brethren were able to get into a rough circle, able to fend off the weaker
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Harry, blissfully unaware of the ICW’s decision, eventually found himself on the Hogwarts Express with all the students heading back to the castle after the new year, reunited with Neville, Hermione, and Luna.

Hermione haunted them all with a nightmarish description of being able to hear, but unable to do anything else while petrified, prompting a group hug as everyone tried to comfort her.

According to the rumors, everyone who’d been petrified for longer than a few days needed to be seen by a specialist.

“But then why didn’t they try to wake everyone sooner?” Harry asked, outraged that people had been forced to wait for so long in what amounted to total isolation and sensory deprivation.

“Apparently,” Hermione lowered her voice to a whisper, “As long as no one was genuinely injured, Hogwarts did not have to report the attacks. Most petrification victims don’t remember anything about being petrified, but no one had ever been petrified by a basilisk before, so when that came out the restorative potions were ordered from a specialist immediately, but I was only out for a day, you on the other hand,” she pointed at Harry and reached into her bag, eventually pulling out a muggle newspaper, specifically one of the British papers about magic being real. “You broke the International Statute of Secrecy beyond repair! Harry, you’re going to be in so much trouble!”

Looking only slightly sheepish, Harry replied, “That was partially Uncle Jet Jaguar’s idea, but more importantly if I was in trouble, don’t you think they’d have done something, I don’t know, a week ago? They’d hardly want a felon aboard the train with children after all.”

Neville and Luna were reading the article with strange expressions on their faces, as though caught between intense shock and utter horror.

“Harry,” Luna said in a small voice, “Hermione is right, you’re going to be badly punished for this.”

“Even if — probably especially because the law’s been broken beyond repair.” Neville added.

Mildly worried now, Harry put on a brave face and said, “It’ll all turn out okay, I promise. Don’t worry so much.”

The rest of the trip passed in relative peace, apart from occasional muggleborn students thanking Harry for exposing the world because it meant that they could share things with their families now. Some students, mostly Slytherins, shot him dirty looks as they passed, but that was nothing new and Harry paid it no mind.

It was when they started arriving at the carriages that things took a turn for the worse.

Aurors were there, checking all the students, but only until they spotted Harry. Then they made a beeline for him.

They were also glaring.

“Harry James Potter,” one of them began in a tone filled with suppressed rage.

Harry made an on the spot decision and loudly replied, “Is this where I get my Order of Merlin for taking care of the basilisk?”

Students were already watching the scene, eager to see how it played out. The Slytherins had hungry expressions on their faces.

“No Potter, this is where we place arrest you for breaking the International Statute of Secrecy, the Wizarding World’s most sacred law!”

“Seriously? If I was actually in trouble wouldn’t you have done it a week ago when this actually happened? My address isn’t exactly a secret you know.”

The aurors all flushed with anger, and Harry had an epiphany.

“None of you have any idea how to get to my home, do you?”

The lead auror raised his wand.

“Enough Potter! Are you going to come quietly or not?”

Harry counted. There were five aurors and they all had their wands trained on him.

“When can I expect my trial?”

“Trial? Ha! The ICW tried you in absentia boy, it’s straight to Azkaban for you!”

Harry nodded his understanding, sighed, and then yelled, “EVERYONE OWL THE MEDIA!”

At that point he got hit by spells of some kind and knew no more.

“Lily, it’s him, take Harry and run! I’ll hold him off!”

That night the Wizarding World’s newspapers had a single front page article on the “Boy-Who-Betrayed.”

The next morning the newspapers of the muggle world had a different headline: “Wizards Put Child in Secret North Sea Prison.”

At the same time, on the opposite side of the world, Godzilla woke in the dead of night.

Many years ago he’d sensed Minilla’s distress and come to his aid as quickly as he could. But now he could sense Harry in danger.

He set off, following his instincts. Minilla would be safe for the moment. Anguirus and Rodan would know to look after his child in his absence. With a roar that announced his departure on a mission, he stepped into the sea.

“Dumbledore,” Cornelius Fudge blustered, “You’ve got to fix this. The muggle prime minister won’t leave the portrait we’ve put in his office alone, he keeps insisting that we release Potter, and the portrait is so annoyed he’s started on me to avoid listening to the man.”

The aged headmaster paused in thought. He’d never had to deal with a muggle politician, how was he to know what to do?

From his perch beside the headmaster’s desk, Fawkes started to sing, and with the beautiful music going through his mind Dumbledore had an idea.

“Cornelius, all you need to do is have him obliviated, and ensure that he his told afterwords that the problem is being taken care of.”

Fudge gawked at him, “But, the muggle news-”

“Will hound him, not you, and honestly Cornelius, considering your concerns about the purity of blood, I didn’t think you’d care about the muggle news.”

Fudge paused for a moment as that sank in. “Yes, yes, you’re onto something there. Thank you, Dumbledore, now if you don’t mind I’ll be on my way.”

With that the Minister of Magic stepped into the fireplace and returned to the Ministry, leaving Dumbledore and Fawkes to congratulate themselves on another problem solved.

“Stand aside you silly girl!”

Meanwhile the Secretary General of the United Nations processed all the information on his desk, Jet Jaguar standing guard at his side, and a wizard in a plain robe in front of him.

“So, correct me if I am wrong, but as a society, these wizards have decided to ‘obliviate’ their direct liaisons with our world — to erase their very memories — and simply ignore us, while leaving the child to rot in a prison guarded by creatures that are demons in all but name?”

The wizard flinched under his gaze, but replied, “Yes. As muggles — nonmagical folk that is — they see you as little more than barbarians; many have the same prejudice towards people like me — muggleborns; wizards or witches born to muggle parents. Truthfully, they don’t believe they are answerable to any other authorities, and even if they agreed to listen to you, they’d dismiss anything you got them to agree to as ignorable the moment you left.”

The Secretary General considered this for a moment. “And you are sure that the approval to lock the boy in Azkaban was unanimous?”

“Completely sir.”

At that moment an aid came in with a sheet of paper, handing it to the Secretary General, who looked at it and then recoiled.

“How long has he been gone?”

“The sensors indicate that he submerged some time last night.”

He processed this information as well, before sighing heavily and saying, “I will contact the appropriate authorities, but I fear that they are about to receive an object lesson in just how destructive a kaiju can be.”

“No, not Harry! Take me instead, anything but Harry!”

Godzilla’s blood was chilled by these cold northern waters, but rage kept him warm and he persevered. Every moment that passed Harry’s distress seemed to increase. The child’s fear was almost palpable at this point. He surfaced briefly to gauge how far he had come.

He had no way of knowing this, but he was currently in the Barents Sea, south of Svaalbard and a ways northwest of his destination. Dissatisfied, he submerged once more.


Azkaban Prison was a formidable place. Atop a rock just barely large enough to hold it in the dead center of the North Sea, the dark structure was the only legacy of the little known and profoundly insane dark wizard Ekrizdis. He had made a habit of luring muggle sailors to his island and then tormenting them with the worst forms of the Dark Arts. So terrible were his deeds that the very walls were imbued with dark magic, and those first explorers who’d found the island after his death refused to speak of what they had seen, only warning others that the place was infested with dementors and that those were the least terrible things on the island. The location was so saturated with evil that in the days after its discovery, experts cautioned that any attempt to destroy the fortress would cause some terrible, intangible will to seek vengeance.

Now, some five centuries later, it had been magically expanded to house the worst of the magical worlds’ prisoners, those for whom there could be no redemption and no mercy. The only guards were the dementors themselves, for they were the only ones who could endure the conditions on the island and in the old fortress.

And one child. Twelve year old Harry James Potter.

Harry knew that his parents names had been James and Lily. He knew that they’d died for him.

And thanks to the dementors he knew exactly how that had happened.

His father had apparently tried to fight off Voldemort and perished in the attempt. During a lucid moment Harry hoped he was resting in peace. He also knew that Voldemort had tried to spare his mother for his own inscrutable reasons, but that she had refused utterly and died trying to protect him.

In another lucid moment as despair began taking him, he asked, “Was it worth it, Mum?”

The cell was cold. Extremely so. His only relief was the fire he could breath, and even that only in short spurts. This whole place and everything about it seemed designed to drain away the will to go on.

Harry felt the chill in the air heralding an approaching dementor and gave an involuntary shudder that had nothing to do with the cold.

And then he heard an earsplitting roar and the fire inside him that had almost gone out flared with new vigor.

Godzilla surfaced from the ocean beside Azkaban and let out a roar of unbridled fury. The moment he’d approached the accursed rock he’d begun to remember things. Horrible things. The worst parts of his life.

His last days as a dinosaur, a lonely existence as the last of his kind.

The hydrogen bomb’s fire and radiation.

The agony of his transformation from the last dinosaur into the first of whatever he was today as his blood boiled, bones splintered, and organs shifted and changed, even as he refused to die.

Seeing Minilla, the only other of his kind and the only hope he had for a family at the mercy of Kamacuras and later Kumonga.

He did not know what this island made Harry see. And truthfully, he did not care because it ended now.

He sensed Harry on the far side of the structure. Good. It allowed him to tear this side asunder.

His dorsal spines flared blue and then azure death ripped into the walls of the fortress. Shrill cries came from cloaked figures as they burned to death, and tiny prisoners screamed in utter terror of the monster bearing down on them.

Godzilla reached into the prison and began tearing it apart with his claws, crushing and tearing stone as easily as the witches, wizards, and dementors that sought refuge in the structure’s walls.

Sirius Black, currently in his animagus form — that of an enormous black dog — did not know what was happening except for a couple of things. First, he might be deaf after whatever that noise was, and second, the prison was crumbling all around him. This was his best chance for freedom!

He headed towards the disturbance, only to double back on seeing the thing that was destroying the prison.

His first thought was that it was a dragon, but no dragon had ever grown so large or looked at anything with such hatred and rage in its eyes.

His best chance for survival was in the opposite direction and hoping that the tremors had broken the door open.

Other prisoners that were attempting to escape returned to their cells at the sight of him, believing him to be the legendary grimm, the omen of imminent and inescapable death.

He saw the doorway, he was so close, and then he saw something out of the corner of his eye that chilled him more than any dementor ever could.

At first he thought it was just a dementor looming over someone about to die to take their soul before death took it, but even in his haste to get away he noted the poor man’s resemblance to James. But James was dead, and he hadn’t had any family left except—

Harry! It might be a dying hallucination, but Sirus could not take that chance. He lunged at the dementor with all the strength he could muster.

It fought him, but it dropped Harry, choosing instead to use both hands to attempt to strangle him. He bit its horrible neck, trying to ignore the taste of putrescent flesh and the funeral shroud it called a cloak that punished him for that. With surprising strength, the dementor pried open his jaws and threw him to the ground.

He’d never been thrown by a dementor, but he got back up. He glanced toward the boy and they made eye contact.

Those were Lily’s eyes on James’s face. Sirius didn’t even want to know why Harry was locked up here.

No, that was wrong. He wanted to know quite badly and then he wanted to tear out the throat of whoever was responsible, but that could wait. There was still a dementor bent on taking Harry’s soul, and that was not going to happen.

To his surprise, Harry got up. He needed to use him to steady himself, but he stood up and he looked like he was ready to fight too.

And then Sirius got the shock of his life as Harry inhaled deeply and then exhaled a stream of blue fire right at the dementor.

It let out an unholy shriek the likes of which Sirius had never heard before and hoped he’d never hear again as it fled the room flailing.

Harry collapsed immediately afterward, and Sirius move to check on him, but stopped when he heard a rumble and a crash. He looked back and saw that the cell’s entrance had collapsed, they were trapped here.

Unsure what else he could do, Sirius curled around Harry protectively.

More rumbling and the entire ceiling was ripped away in an instant, and there it was. The monster that had destroyed the prison and would no doubt end their lives. It was even looking down now, singling them out.

The monster growled softly and then ripped the walls of the cell away. Before Sirius could do anything though, it gently scooped the both of them up and held them in its enormous hand.

Sirius couldn’t help it. He fainted.

Godzilla looked into his hand. Harry looked to be pale and cold, but otherwise fine. The shaggy beast looked emaciated, but from what he’d been able to sense it had protected Harry, which was good enough for him. He set off towards the Atlantic. They’d be taking the longer, warmer way back to Monster Island.

Godzilla paused some distance away from the rock that had held the prison and looked back. Then he blasted it with the atomic ray. After five-hundred years of bringing despair, Azkaban was utterly destroyed and the rock it had stood on sank into the depths of the sea.

No dog, boy, or kaiju noticed the dark mist that rose out of the water and seemed to dive into one of the dying prisoners in the water, who gasped and then vanished with a faint popping sound…

Harry Potter: Adoptive Kaiju - Chapter 26
Author's Notes: So, I feel that some explanations I couldn't add to the story are in order. First of all, how can they not know where Monster Island is when Dumbledore has been there? Simple; Fawkes took him there, and phoenix magic is very different from ordinary magic. Neither Dumbledore nor any other wizards really know where it is. A for those who remember Hagrid having a portkey, leading to the place, that was a case of "copy and paste" - the letter knew where to go, even if the makes of the portkey didn't, so they just magically copied the destination without really understanding where it went. This is also why Hagrid got sent - nobody else was willing to be the first go to a place called Monster Island.

Also, some have pointed out that I'm not spending much time on dialogue and characterizing Neville, Luna, and Hermione. The reason for that is that things have simply been too rapid-fire for them in-story to have much effect on the plot. Remember, these kids are only 12 at the moment. But I do solemnly swear that they will have more to do in the coming years, and we'll get a proper feel for their strengths and weaknesses.
Last night I finally saw Shin Godzilla. I read multiple spoilers online because I couldn't stand the wait, but some of them were so bizarre that I wasn't entirely sure what to believe going into the theater.

I'll start with the most common criticism: the movie spent way too much time focusing on bureaucracy. I know that this was meant to be a more "realistic" take on Godzilla, but the focus on red tape and backroom deals made it painfully realistic. And I don't mean painful in the "Oh, I feel for these people" way, but painful in the "When the skreonk will it end?" kind of way. If they really wanted the audience to focus on the people, then they should have focused more on the civilians and their fear of this giant monster and the pain of being forced to leave everything behind during the evacuation.

Having said that, the bureaucratic moments are less aggravating than they could be thanks to the use of really good music. The soundtrack to this movie is awesome, and I truly have nothing bad to say about it.

I will say this about the human parts of the movie; whoever wrote it had a lot of fun playing with the science fiction aspects of Godzilla. Other spoiler-y reviews have talked about the reveal that Godzilla is actually a rapidly evolving set of microbes a-la Hedorah, so I'm going to focus more on the other parts that have received less attention.

First, when Godzilla first goes dormant after unleashing the atomic ray for the first time (which, by the way, is a visual spectacle that justifies the price of admission by itself) they try to monitor him with drones, but find that they can't, leading one scientist to remark that Godzilla has some kind of biological radar system that lets him track and subdue anything he sees as a threat. This is a throwaway line that is never referenced again, but when you think about it it explains how he's able to shoot down planes, missiles, and bombs he can't even see.

Second, another scientist says that Godzilla's evolution is being "self-driven." For reasons that will likely never be explained (the director did create Evangelion and I've heard how bizarre that story is) Godzilla is forcing himself to evolve towards... something. After the team (whose title I missed because I was reading the dialogue, so I'll just call them "G-Force") get a chance to examine tissues from a spike blown off of him (by a pair of MOP IIs dropped by B52 bombers for any military geeks reading this) he also says that Godzilla could sprout wings and fly away or shrink just as quickly as he grew. Others look at the way the still-living tissue reproduces and suggest that Godzilla could be going somewhere to reproduce, and with his combination of adaptations his kind would be the new dominant species.

Finally, other reviews have pointed out that the US comes across as rather villainous. Around 90% of this is because of them jumping to the conclusion to nuke Godzilla, but the other part is because they kept his existence hidden in the first place. It does not justify anything, but something other reviews seem to gloss over is why the US tried to keep him hidden. Something that gets pointed out is that Godzilla's teeth are so malformed and crooked that he can't actually eat anything – he's still operating on the original nuclear waste pile, and the side effect of that is that his body contains entirely unique elements and molecules. It was challenging to read the subtitles and pay attention to the imagery, but I believe that they said his physiology had created an entirely new and more efficient way to generate energy.

Godzilla is – apart from that moment with the B52s – virtually impervious to military attacks. I saw "virtually" because the concentrated tank fire on his legs does force him to slow down, and annoys him so much that he makes the effort to throw a bridge at the tanks. I'm not making that up – we don't get to see him pick it up because there's a cloud of smoke in the way, but Godzilla actually rips up a chunk of bridge and hurls it at the tanks.

Throughout the movie, Godzilla's motivations are unclear, but he is very determined. When he emerges in his beige, googly-eyed, larval form he looks ridiculous but I give him credit for being unstoppable. He has only two legs, nubs where his arms should be, and no ability to stand upright but he continues to march, his back half shoving his wriggling front half along, giving him the appearance of an incredibly destructive snowplow. That said, there's a moment that can be seen as funny (or as terrifying after the reveal that people are in the building) when the larval Godzilla tries to stand by using a building as a prop, angling his head and neck to slide up the wall until he almost looks like he's about to roar in victory... only for the building to collapse under his weight and leave him flat on his face again.

The last 15 to 20 minutes of the movie is dedicated to the plan to freeze Godzilla with a coagulant. They emphasize that this will not kill him, but it will force him to shut down his internal reactor to stay alive. A lot of very technical terms were thrown around, but the basic gist is that one of those unique chemicals in his body will attach to the coagulant and keep it in his system indefinitely.

This brings us to the actual plan to take him down, which is ingenious, destructive, and a visual spectacle. First, they force him to expend nearly all of his energy to destroy 5 waves of UAVs and their missiles and then knock him over by dropping nearby skyscrapers on him. Once he's down, a small army of volunteers drive cranes up to his mouth and force feed him the coagulant. These people die heroically as godzilla charges and unleashes one last atomic ray and gets up. There's also some bureaucratic tension thrown in because it keeps cutting back to the command center where the technicians say that Godzilla is releasing double the approved amount of radiation.

This leads to the second part of the plan. Godzilla sets foot on a set of train tracks, and trains loaded with explosives are set on course to collide with him and explode. How many trains? I lost count, so I'm just going to say that it was all of them. Regardless, this is enough firepower to knock him over, and more volunteers drive up with more cranes and the remaining coagulant. There is one final moment of tension as Godzilla stands up and begins marching while charging up the atomic ray... only for the glow to fade and for him to flash freeze. And I do mean freeze; his core temperature is measured at -196ºC and he actually appears to be covered in ice.

The story ends with the two "main" characters (they barely got more screentime than anybody else) reflecting that they cut it very close. There were only around 3500 seconds remaining until the US got permission to fire the nuke, and the countdown will resume if Godzilla ever starts moving again. The movie ends with the single biggest WTF moment in any Godzilla movie ever, even if you include Tristar's abomination. The camera pans to Godzilla's tail where one more transformation appears to have taken place: humanoid skeletons with Godzilla spikes and tails are erupting from the tail and reaching for the sky. As a note to anyone (including me) who wants to write a story doing something with that, those figures would be giants if they fully emerged based on their size compared to the sheer girth of the tail.

And there you have it. There's probably more to say, and I'm sure that I forgot some details, but that's the movie in a nutshell.

TL;DR – 4/5 stars. It would be 3/5, but the soundtrack is great even during the boring bits, and every time the atomic ray comes out it justifies the price of admission.


United States


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