THIS HIATUS/MONTH IN REVIEW - June 1 - July 13
Hello everyone, wanted to give an update on all that's been going on in my life. Read on to see the details of everything!
THE DETAILS OF EVERYTHING.
So to begin, over a month ago I decided to go on a hiatus. For those of you that have been around for a long time it's not that uncommon of me. What you may not have noticed is that it was one of my longest spans of work BEFORE taking a hiatus. The month or two before then I'd been wrought with stress and depression and decided to continue going. I believed, and still do, that one can't rise to success without some self sacrifice. Finally my pressure onward popped and left me almost completely burnt out.
During my break I essentially focused on doing absolutely nothing about Get Rich or my broader aspirations with Genome Studios. Even so I still was overcome with worry and stress for... nearly the entire month of June. It was a crushing feeling getting almost no relief from such a long break.
Since then I've taken some active efforts to seek out help for my health issues. Consulting with my doctor, trying to schedule appointments with counselors, and with specialists. I have nothing concrete as of yet, but I'm still slowly working towards it as I can. I truly do want to be more healthful, in whatever way that means for me, considering I have such frequent and overwhelming fatigue.
Finally in the past few weeks, essentially this July, I've seen some lift to my spirits. Where I was hovering between -10% to +10% in the line of emotional/physical health, I'm now feeling more around 5% to 25%. I feel more capable of handling my day, I am more inspired, and though I'm still experiencing a lot of pain and fatigue, I'm able to tolerate it a lot more. I intend to... try to figure out how to alleviate some of that pain. The problem is that there's no certain way to do it and I may just be chasing my tail.
During my break I ended up buckling and deciding to invest in myself. I nearly paid off a loan I had taken to make a Genome Studios video game, Silence, almost 8 years ago. So I ended up buying a new computer that can stream AND illustrate without any lag, and along side that I grabbed a Cintiq HD22. My god does it feel like a dream. So much smoother and responsive than my old set up!
This week I managed to squeeze in a streaming session where I put together one more storyboard for The Republic... along with the majority of the stream being me troubleshooting stupid stuff with new windows updates that screw with the drawing pen... assholes...
The rest of this week I've spent taking on responsibilities I've long put off, being inspired by totally random ideas and concepts and crashing every second day.
Yesterday I did some game programming tutorials to prototype some base mechanics (the ground) for that long standing dream to make the game Silence. It was a lot of fun, though truly the concept is daunting and I only intend to screw around with it as I'm inspired.
Along with all my troubles, my artist, Gabi, has been experiencing a really rough time as well. I gave her this month off to try and recover as well.
MOVING FORWARD - THE FUTURE
So I've had a lot of time to stew on my burnout and physical health. I have been trying to push to be a successful recognized professional, however, the truth is that that reality is not coming. I pushed and held my breath as long as I could for it this year and my work isn't getting any traction and my efforts are essentially killing me and my passion for pursuing creative projects at all.
For the immediate future I will be down shifting back towards a hobbyist level pursuit. I will be slowing the comic releases back to once a week, I'll be reducing my push/pressure for patronage and rewards, and I'll be allowing myself to fuck off and explore other projects and ideas (even if it's not for a serious world shattering full time production).
In regards to Patrons, I would like to query you guys about your continued support. In no way do I want you to support me with nothing in return, but if you still like my work and are happy to follow along even during this reduced push I'm still happy to accept your patronage. The Patreon funds I accrue go towards bonuses for Gabi so that she can continue working for me and hopefully have some financial relief beyond the bare minimum I'm able to pay her.
I will also be reducing my active Social Media outreach. Juggling the outreach for 7 websites with very minimal engagement has been nearly a full time job in and of itself. I want to dial it down to a manageable bite that I can do while prioritizing actually working. Spending 20 minutes posting about streaming is both a desuader for me to even want to stream as well as 20 minutes of effort that could be going to actually streaming.
All this considered, I want to recognize for myself and for all of you that I still LOVE creating Get Rich and creative projects in general. It's still one of the basest parts of my being and won't be going away any time soon. Though I have to step back and take more care I'll still be keeping you all posted about all the random crap I'm up to and still keep working on Get Rich.
I'm not quite up to my regular working power so the rest of this month will be a little... spotty regarding what the hell is going on. But I am gearing up to get back to a regular working schedule and will let you all know once I've got there.
Thanks for reading. Thanks for your continued support.