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I've been thinking about art a bit and I would really like to have my things in one portfolio again, even though I haven't really made much in the last few years. I will try to upload these few artworks as long as I can find the motivation to do so.

I've started to get into pottery in the autumn of last year, so you will hopefully see some of my clay sculptures then. This is currently the medium I work most often in, since the sessions at the atelier I go to are quite therapeutic for me. My drawings have been nothing more than sketches though, now that I have been done with all kinds of university for quite a long time, so I lack the patience for that.

I have deleted the thousands of messages that have accumulated in my inbox here since I can't possibly look through them. Sorry for ignoring anyone who tried to contact me during my hiatus.
  • Playing: Mountain
Here I am, emerging from the depths of the internet. The year 2012 has been a void, I had a long downtime because I kept fucking up the important task of moving on with my education/career, which resulted in sitting at home and fretting over myself for a long time. But with the start of the new year, things have changed for the better. I now have my work/internship and it feels a lot better than I could have hoped for. I'm trying to keep up with things and people that are important to me, and trying to pass for a reasonable person...

Recently I spent two weeks at uni again for a series of seminars, strange to be brought back to that place. It isn't what it used to be, a lot of my old friends and purpose friends are now missing because they moved on in time, and the department seems to disintegrate slowly... But sitting in a stuffy, artificially lit room with a voice reciting pharmaceutics-related monologue to me inspired me to hold some pencils for a while again. I know art is still a part of who I am, and I'm not just supposed to consume other's work. It's shameful how very, very little I make myself nowadays. I'm always aware that I ought to work on it, but it's hard to take the time for it when I could be doing some much less challenging, unimportant time wasting instead. Need to think about that some more.

One more thing, my last feature journal has been sitting here for over a year, so I think I displayed those artworks for long enough now :) But here's a new feature with some recent works of someone who evidently hasn't forgotten about me in all this time!

:iconlittleartistren-ren:
PIGEON TIEM by LittleArtistRen-Ren Lighting Of The Lanterns by LittleArtistRen-Ren Shatter Every Window Until It's All Blown Away by LittleArtistRen-Ren
A few days ago I was featured in aboveClouds s journal, so now I'll add my part of the trade. Maybe somebody is still interested :)

Rules:
1. For each of the 20 (lol) first people answering this journal, I will put their avatar and the three deviations I like most from their gallery on the list!
2. If you answer, you have to do the same in your journal, putting the tagger on the first place. The idea of this is not to get a free feature, it is to spread art around for everyone!

~

1. :iconaboveclouds:
Things That Hide Away by aboveClouds Storm Front Battle by aboveClouds Snow Games by aboveClouds

2. :iconbewildermunster:
Jackalope on a Mission by Bewildermunster Little Mountain Dog by Bewildermunster Three by Bewildermunster

3. :iconlittleartistren-ren:
Piping Plover by LittleArtistRen-Ren Fear by LittleArtistRen-Ren Dreams COLORED by LittleArtistRen-Ren

4. :iconmomopocky:
-LATE- 2008 Secret Santa by momopocky Born Of Fire by momopocky I Must Sleep Now... by momopocky

5. :iconullakko:
Night Watch by ullakko :thumb282748927: feeding the pets by ullakko
I've moved again, this time to a more permanent place and finally with my weasel, which feels right. I have become a burgeois now at the age of 22 years. We have pastry forks. My parents were in awe when I served homemade cake. Maybe I should go and reserve a plot on the local graveyard for later, just to be sure!

Ahead lies what feels like it's gonna be the hardest time of my life so far, my final exams around march next year. It's gonna break me for sure. But for now, I just have a lot of the usual uni stuff, lab time is sped up and compressed and hard to follow. I go from one day to the next without thinking about much good stuff. The first one of the three little exams will be soon, and some presentations. I miss my old circle of friends. Hard to keep up with everything else, too. I try to make some art at least.
  • Listening to: Radiohead - No Surprises
  • Reading: Last chance to see - Douglas Adams
I've moved into my new mini appartment now, indeed it's much better than the old tiny room at the student dorm. We bought some furniture, which I like very much, and also some kitchen equipment. So far it feels ok. Also I succeeded in some of my Uni tasks so far, but there's more ahead.
I tried drawing some stuff, mostly nothing upload-worthy. I don't get a lot of feedback on the stuff I deem worthy either, of course all the legions of unknown artists here have the same problem and it doesn't help a lot if I upload only one thing per month or so!
Enough with the whining then.
  • Listening to: Astronautalis
  • Reading: Everything is illuminated by J. Safran Foer
  • Watching: My little Pony - Friendship is magic
  • Playing: Rift
Found an appartment. Got to manage all that stuff about moving now. I hate that damned lab and all the other uni stuff, it's a lot of stress. I hope I don't lose it completely.
Got a few 1000 messages from watches etc accumulated.. let's see when I can start to look at them.
At the moment I'm trying to find a new appartment because I'm slowly going crazy in my 13 m² dorm room (plus shared bathrooms + kitchen for the whole corridor). Turns out it's even harder than I anticipated. 1-2 room appartments are not only very expensive but also very very scarce. There are always 20+ (and appearantly, sometimes over 50) other applicants no matter where I go. All this is adding to me going crazy faster.
Also uni is starting again on the 4. which sucks because I'll have less time to look at appartments and even more stress.
I'll continue my search until I drop dead.
So things are looking pretty bleak and I didn't have the leisure I hoped for this vacation. I spent all of it (5 weeks) in Hamburg on my search and didn't even visit my boyfriend once. Of course haven't been drawing anything either (except the Uniwalter on one lucky day) even though I should. It sucks if you have to force yourself. Also there's all those other people with their problems that stress me, too.
One of the few things that make me happy is Pokemon White which I'm playing in my usual incredibly slow manner. My favourite is Munna which is a pink stubby tapir/Baku monster with a flower pattern.
Es geht um die unfassbar miesen Haltungsbedingungen von Kaninchen in der "Lebensmittelindustrie". Ob ihr Fleisch esst oder nicht, so soll man Tiere auf keinen Fall behandeln dürfen, und ich hoffe, ihr seht das genauso.
Hier ist die Petition, sie ist auf der offiziellen Petitionsseite des Bundestags, man braucht also eine Registrierung. Aber erstens dauert das nicht lang und zweitens gibt es auf der Seite öfter mal eine Petition, die es sich zu unterstützen lohnt. Also zeichnet mit!

epetitionen.bundestag.de/index…

Mehr Infos und Fotos von den realen Zuständen:

www.vier-pfoten.de/website/out…




------------------

Features!

:iconinner-etch: inner-etch, famous for her diary-comics about alcohol, bearded men and the rabbit Walter.
zoe vs tim - 'pillar pancakes by inner-etch THINGS THAT HAPPENED 050 by inner-etch hobo by inner-etch Cranedeer by inner-etch MysticalUnicornIncenseBurner by inner-etch

:iconbirdkisses: birdkisses, who is really good at drawing canines with plenty of paws and trippy designs.
Burial by birdkisses Satellite Heart by birdkisses The bricks are bright and free by birdkisses take me down by birdkisses We go everywhere together by birdkisses

:iconglad-sad: Glad-Sad makes beautiful drawings, paintings and engravings and also the neatest detailed little avatars.
:thumb189826994: :thumb189359021: :thumb151720843: Teal Owl Icon for Ginnunga by Glad-Sad RubisFirenos Icon by Glad-Sad

:iconenonea: enonea is better at drawing humans than I will ever be! Very creative and skillfully made paintings too.
A tractor and a marine anthro by enonea frostbitten by enonea My Patronus 2005 by enonea 5ofC - Seeking Solace by enonea TAC - My future as fertilizer by enonea

:iconlaguwaga: laguwaga, who knows that Typhlosion is a badger (not a ferret!) - though my fav is the awesome cormorant pic.
GHOST by laguwaga TYPH by laguwaga Illness by laguwaga Strange terrain by laguwaga

---

(Sketch-)Trades: open, but very unreliable
Commissions: open, can take long, price: to be discussed, payment via paypal (no DA points)
If anybody is interested, I'll put some little features in my journal. I don't get many visitors but who knows, somebody may discover your artttt.
Just show me up to 5 of your pictures, if you give me less than 5, I will choose the rest from your gallery.

Features!

:iconinner-etch: inner-etch, famous for her diary-comics about alcohol, bearded men and the rabbit Walter.
zoe vs tim - 'pillar pancakes by inner-etch THINGS THAT HAPPENED 050 by inner-etch hobo by inner-etch Cranedeer by inner-etch MysticalUnicornIncenseBurner by inner-etch

:iconbirdkisses: birdkisses, who is really good at drawing canines with plenty of paws and trippy designs.
Burial by birdkisses Satellite Heart by birdkisses The bricks are bright and free by birdkisses take me down by birdkisses We go everywhere together by birdkisses

:iconglad-sad: Glad-Sad makes beautiful drawings, paintings and engravings and also the neatest detailed little avatars.
:thumb189826994: :thumb189359021: :thumb151720843: Teal Owl Icon for Ginnunga by Glad-Sad RubisFirenos Icon by Glad-Sad

:iconenonea: enonea is better at drawing humans than I will ever be! Very creative and skillfully made paintings too.
A tractor and a marine anthro by enonea frostbitten by enonea My Patronus 2005 by enonea 5ofC - Seeking Solace by enonea TAC - My future as fertilizer by enonea

:iconlaguwaga: laguwaga, who knows that Typhlosion is a badger (not a ferret!) - though my fav is the awesome cormorant pic.
GHOST by laguwaga TYPH by laguwaga Illness by laguwaga Strange terrain by laguwaga

*your feature here*

---

(Sketch-)Trades: open, but very unreliable
Commissions: open, can take long, price: to be discussed, payment via paypal (no DA points)
i've been on vacation for a few weeks now and there's still plenty of time to relax. i don't do much except for a little origami. you can look at the stuff i folded at this folder:
gescheitert.deviantart.com/gal…
next thing to do is a trip to the baltic sea with my mother and weasel. it's gonna be nice :)

---

:icontapirfans: tapir fans unite!
:iconthedivinecervine: deer fans unite!
:iconthe-suidae-family: pig fans unite!

:iconmorbidhyena: my stock photography
  • Reading: roman diaz - origami essence
i completed my last major task for this semester today, all that's left to do is listening to a few lectures. after that, i will have a tiny research project at the start of semester break. i'm actually looking forward to it, it sounds like fun. but first, i will meet my sister and hopefully the rest of my family soon.
i haven't been making any real art, and, as always, i'm too lazy to scan all the little sketches. i've got lots of little things to do and i keep procastinating..

---
tapir fans unite! :icontapirfans:
my stock photography: :iconmorbidhyena:
  • Listening to: pullman
  • Reading: hermann hesse - demian
  • Eating: falafel
  • Drinking: grapefruit juice
i'm at semester 6 now, looks good so far. i will have to go through semester 5 after that because of my fail and some crazy rules at my uni, i'm a bit nervous about that prospect since most people of my usual group of friends will be in semester 7 during that time. we'll see how it works out this autumn.
during the last month or so i've been doing some stuff with my family. we visited german north sea island helgoland with my parents and looked at all the birds and seals. of course it was very nice. this weekend i met up with my sister (hi!) in hamburg. now i have a week of holidays but i'm not going anywhere, i have stuff to do for the uni and later i'll visit my weasel again.

in other news, i made a seperate stock photography account
:iconmorbidhyena:
because you watchers are probably not interested in that kind of stuff from me. my photography attempts are amateurish, but maybe some people can get a kick out of it or use it for their artwork, i don't know.
  • Listening to: amelie soundtrack
  • Eating: toast with tomato + herb salt
i'm playing a bit with cinema4d. not animating, just 3d modeling. i'm really bad at it and don't know how long i'll keep it up. so far it's fun anyway.
still got some free time to waste before the next big exams and the new semester. looking forward to easter + being with my family.
in other news, check out the best tapir group on deviantart: #TapirFans tapirfans.deviantart.com/
you should probably join if you like tapirs at all!
  • Eating: sugary cereal
the nightmare is over.. i passed the exam.. i'm one of the happiest 70% of the world!
  • Drinking: girly beer
another year of
pain and tears
been living for sad
21 years
and all i do
is fail and cry
how much longer will i
have to try
to

do good at uni?
shave correctly? (..)
act all fair?
cause i don't really care :/

murder my cat?
do my laundry?
wash my hair?
cause i don't really care ://

i just
don't really caaaareee :///
only a few more yearrrrssssss?

lyrics sort of (c) yotam perel
having all the usual negative thoughts. blocking them out can be easy, but not most of the time. this stuff leads to nothing.
uni is not really exciting at all, lack of motivation and the steady reminder of failing. at least i get to draw some more, because they gave us some actual lecture notes this sem. wow! so if you think i should sketch something specific, tell me here and maybe i can do it.
the world is totally a fucking vale of tears!
  • Listening to: muse all the way!
  • Reading: stefan zweig
  • Playing: dofus
  • Eating: packet soup with 400% of my daily NaCl dose
today i'm going home (7h train ride) to my parents and tomorrow my mum and me are going to drive across half of the country again for another week of vacation. it's gonna be nice.
a week ago my weasel and me were in berlin, which was nice too. i got to sketch some animals at the zoo, that was fun. lifedrawing is good because it doesn't take any imagination, very relaxing.
so i failed that last exam, the only one i needed, now i can't take the state examination this summer, like a lot of us because it was just.. very hard. i'm losing half a year, it's kind of depressing but i'm also happy about the free time. i have been to a revision course the last 11 days, started it before i knew about the exam outcomces. that was VERY exhausting. 12 hours of lecture/seminar every day, and sleeping in a youth hostel. for the test that i can't even take now. but it still helped.
eating wasn't so easy, too, because they didn't have any vegan meals of course, and hardly any time to get something for myself. i managed to survive, anyway.
tomorrow, i'm going to visit my weasel for some time, hang around doing nothing and then go on vacation in berlin. i'll hopefully get some actual cooked food soon! after that, i'm going on another vacation with my mother, to the baltic sea on that one tiny island where we were so many times before.
when the semester starts again, i'll listen to the lectures for the 5. semester anyway, don't know what else to do with the time and it will help when i finally get to the 5. semester (if i ever get there :( )
bah, my english is awful today. also, my laptop is doing strange things. the monitor starts to flicker after it's been on for a few hours. i hope i can fix it :/
  • Reading: 13 reasons why
my life is boring. i don't do much. i have lots of work at the uni. i don't produce any interesting art. hopefully things will get better at the end of august, but who knows!
  • Listening to: mogwai - take me somewhere nice
  • Reading: my notes from the lectures
  • Eating: toast with peperoni
technically it's semester break, but i have practical courses like always. i am now done with physical chemistry (except for the colloquium) and the next 2 weeks are dedicated to microbiology. i spent the last weekends with the weasel, hanging around, going to the zoo, and other cheap (the niveau, not the price) entertainment.
life is moderate, moderately exciting and depressing, seen as a whole. most food is now vegan, i don't feel better or worse actually. i'm going home for easter, that will stop me for a few days. i can't expect that from my family, to support my new complicated behaviour. it'S a big topic anyway, bigger than i would like it to be. but there's just nothing else happening.
i draw only bad sketches, tapirs all over again, nothing fancy. i'd upload it if it was worth it.
  • Listening to: katatonia - discouraged ones
  • Playing: viva pinata DS