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Rise from bed. [03:19 this time maintain randomness]  Straighten the bedclothes.  Walk to the bathroom. [13 steps; fatigue is showing]  Swallow multivitamins.  Urinate.  Shower. [filthy piece of SHIT!]  Dry.  Walk to the dressing area.   Dress. [uniform #3, facial prosthesis #16, accent #8]  Check appearance in the mirror.  Go to the door.  Open it.  Walk.

There was a time when the day would be greeted with a hearty "Good Morning!"  Various tunes would be hummed or sung to accompany the morning's routines.  A simple breakfast would start things off, made with care and savored.  A favorite book might be revisited, perhaps with the Wurlitzer playing in the background.  The day's business would be attended to quickly and efficiently:  programming, construction, research;  cleaning, exercise, meditation.  Meals would be prepared as needed, each receiving its share of focus.  Evening might be filled with poetry, a film, or more music before the day was bid farewell.

Pass by the feeding supplies - no food today.  Walk to the door.  Open it quickly and loudly. [asleep; maximum disorientation]  Put the bag over the head. [what oh god please stop no don't hurt me stop]  Strike the head, shout.  Grab the arm.  Tighter, make a bruise.  Don't torque the arm; pull straight, or it breaks.

Now the days begin at random, often spanning more hours than they should.  Meals - if they are consumed at all - consist of liquid supplement rations
(because one night he caught himself humming as he measured out the dog food he was using as a base for her meals)  

that require little preparation.  Eating is maintenance, nothing more.  Music and films are a distraction and a security hazard;
(turning to them for solace would be an obscenity)

the sound could travel to the cells and endanger the illusion.  Reading material is now strictly work-oriented
(ever since the night he'd broken down weeping in the middle of reading a poem)

because so many plans have had to be altered.
Handcuff the wrists to the bench, one notch too tight. [Siddown SIT filthy slag]  Turn on the light.  Activate recording C-27a.  Remove the bag.  Grip the back of the neck.  Shut off the recording.  Push the head under the water.  [moderately strong resistance; add a day without food]  Release.  Activate recording C-22c.  Repeat.     Count the seconds.  [seven, eight…better grow some gills, hadn't ya]  Release.  Recording C-31c.     
Repeat.         Release.         Repeat.

There is too much work to be done to allow for indulgence.  There are security systems to hack, explosives to build, physical training to maintain.  There are costumes and accents that need upkeep, interrogation scenarios to construct, feeding schedules to follow, physical damage to calculate and administer.  Delicate work, all of it, demanding the utmost concentration and care.  Everything extraneous must be stripped away.

Bag over the head.  Uncuff the wrists. [blood on the left one]  Walk back to the cell. [maintain rapid pace Stand UP you fucking cunt!]  Open the door.  Remove the bag. [nosebleed making a mess]  Shove the small of the back [wet slap of body hitting concrete]  Close the door.  Engage the lock.  Walk away.

It has been weeks now.  The tears have stopped, finally.  The dreams continue.
(Flashbacks of Larkhill; visions of Evey dead, by his hand or her own; and the worst ones – the ones of tenderness, when he would cradle her and whisper his sorrow at all he'd done to her.)

Sleep is something to be pushed past until it can no longer be avoided.

Return to the dressing area.  Remove the uniform. [large smear of blood on the right sleeve]  Remove facial appliance carefully; don't tear it.  [fucking useless waste of flesh]  Clean makeup residue from skin.  Put away the makeup supplies.  Take uniform to the laundry room.

A tiny, still-human corner of his mind hopes someday she will understand, if not forgive.

Look at bloodstain on sleeve.  [I don't know anything I don't know idon'tknowidon'tknow]  Soak garment in cold water.  Clean out the blood .[fucking piece of SHIT what are you looking at]
  Clean.         Out.  [hold him hold him down fucking talk back to ME will you HOLD 'IM DOWN gonna teach you a lesson that's what hit 'im again fucking hit 'im yeah how ya like that you scum-fucking sonofabitch]

It hopes she can find him again, if she does.

~ Finis ~

Noun: method acting - An acting technique introduced by Constantin Stanislavsky in which the actor recalls emotions or reactions from his or her own life and uses them to identify with the character being portrayed.  []
This spewed out rather suddenly, although bits of it have been lurking in my head for months now. (and I'm glad to have those bits out of my head, thankyouverymuch...)

Inspired in part by :iconsaniika:'s art here.

- All stories housed in order at my website.
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ewigestudentin Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I can totally understand why you were glad to have these bits out of your head back then. They are really scary. But this is just the kind of angst I love in V4V stories so I enjoyed this part more than I probably should O.o #guiltypleasures
FugueState Featured By Owner Apr 9, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Well, I'm glad you did, so don't feel too guilty! :) As much as I enjoy writing "fix-it" fics, I also like (although "like" isn't exactly the right word) when something disturbing becomes inspiration.
no-road-jess Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2009
My God, that is incredible.
This is an amazing idea, I always wondered what was going through V's head throughout his toture of Evey. His pain was beautiful, well done!

Are you writing one from when Evey walks back into the Shadow Gallery?
FugueState Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you very much :thanks:

I did write that, actually - it begins in "Awaken", then continues in "Questions". :)
no-road-jess Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2009
What I meant was when Evey stumbles around the corner into the Shadow Gallery. But Awaken and Questions were amazingly well written, but my favourite out of all is Mending II.
chibi-seijitsu-chan Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2009
Just . . .wow! I really admire the style you used in writing this.

It must've been hard for him to put her through all that.
FugueState Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you! I think it was, at least for V in the film. I'm not so sure about V in the graphic novel... :paranoid:
chibi-seijitsu-chan Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2009
Yes,indeed. I had the pleasure of reading the graphic novel not so long ago, and he's pretty different from his film version. Both are very entertaining, though.XD
TyrineCarver Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2008  Professional Digital Artist
D': Oh my gosh, how heart-wrenching. *sniff* *cries for a bit, then faves*

Very well written, I always felt that this particular episode in their relationship was one of the most original and emotional of any every recorded or created and I do love it when people portray it so wonderfully. Wonderful.
FugueState Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2008  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you - it was disturbing to write, but it needed to be done. :dohtwo:
saniika Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2008  Professional General Artist
And I am glad you did so. <3
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