I hope you all had a wonderful start into the new year. <3
My start was rather jolty and deflating than anything else.
BUT there's light up ahead, as always. I'm going to write exams at the end of January till the end of February
and then I can finally take a break from hardcore studying (well I feel like I'm doin' to much for university...)
I can't wait for my short vacation (only 3 weeks but better than nothing) and I can't wait to start into the 2nd
semester because it's going to be really awesome. I pray to the sun that I'll get through my exams quite good. <3
Did I tell you that I had to go to the hospital at the 21th of December? Because I thought I was going to loose my eyesight? Lol. I woke up early in the morning after caring about my (once again) inflamed eye the evening before. I need to heat my eye and used some strange chemical for desinfection. I accidentally put it into my eye (one needs to be very careful with such chemicals...) and it hurt really bad. Anyways I went to sleep after washing it out with no bad thoughts. When I woke up next morning I had problems
with opening my eyes. Everything was crusted and I couldn't see much but a light spot. When I looked into my eye it was slimy and seemed dull somehow. I never experienced a shock like that. I instantly started crying (what somehow was a good thing because my tears cleaned my eyes) and running around in terror. I tried to call my friend but he turned out his phone. I tried to talk to my mom but she said she's out with the dog I should call later again. I tried to talk to my father at least but he didn't react to my call. I have no money on my phone and no good Internet so I sat there all alone, in complete panic, helpless, crying and cursing life.
I had panic attacks before... but never such a worse one. I have asthma but not anti-asthma spray. It's a horrible thing to feel like
you're suffocating but it's alright, something I can handle. But to loose my eyesight... whew it's one of the worst things life
can do to me. I love seeing. I love colors, shades, structures, flowers... I love it all. And guys... treat your eyes well you never
want to loose them one day.
I went to the hospital and they figured out everything is fine it's nothing worse and I'll be able to see normal again soon.
But I'll need a small surgery.
Ohhh I have more stories of wonderful 2018. So many but I choose this one because it was my 2nd heart attack in a row.
My dog could be dead by now. Worst day of my whole year I guess? Much worse than the day with my eye-sight. It was the 22nd of December. Yay great month. Great month. I took my dog out for a walk and I free her from the leash if we get to a wide field with noone else around. She's very shy, uneasy and afraid of other dogs she doesn't know yet since she's born in a cage with her older siblings and surrounded by crazy and aggressive other street dogs. So she's afraid of strangers. I'd love to see her running around, exploring, having fun. That's why I unleash her as often as I can.
I mentioned a pair walking around on the field but I saw not dog. I didn't heard him. My dog just heard and saw him when he was already behind us. He ran after my dog and hunted her until they reached a blocked stair up to the street. My dog jumped up the stair up to the street and I cried after her but stayed where I was. It was a shock. So many thoughts so less time. I did what I did and it felt like time slowed down just for us. I cried she should STAY ; COME BACK ; SORI! So she stopped and the pair called their dog back. And OH LORD she came back to me even though the was in complete fear she came back and I could put the leash on. I'm so thankful for what ever happened there, I'm thankful that she came back and didn't run across the street. I'm still shaking while writing this down. I had such a shock that I had to sit down for at least 10 minutes to catch my breath and to stop cursing me and the other two people and their dog. And I had such a shock that I wasn't even able to cry.
By the way. The two people just smiled a "sry" at me and left. I'm still mad.
And thankful and sorry and I will never unleash her ever again on that field.
And that's really sad.
Oh no no no, that's not even the "best" of my stories.
But I'll stop here because it's pure stress thinking of all this ... wonderful stuff. c:
And how was your 2018?
I am glad it's over now. I never want 2018 back and I wish for a at least less shocking 2019.
I wish everyone a great year, a successfull and lucky year. Never give up what ever happens.
The last thing I want to share with you guys is that I maybe have to open up commissions again as soon as I have the time
for drawing again. My dog developed mysterious allergies or a chronic illness. We don't know yet. This will change things.
We don't have the money to buy the extremely expensive fodder and the medicine. Also the treatment expenses need
to be paid. I am not able to work next to my studies atm. So I'll try it with commissions once again.
OF COURSE I'll finish other pieces first and in between. <3
Enough of me. Have you had a better 2018?
Or are you happy of leaving it behind as well?
I am sorry for my broken English, I need to expand my vocabulary and let's not talk about my grammar.
I write better english than german sometimes. xd
I'm writing horrible. xD
I still have an inflamation in my left eye but it will be gone till February hopefully. c: