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Deviant for 11 Years
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I wear my lies like armour.
Sliding off the metal before sliding into our bed.
Truth draped over my bones in the form of flesh.
Sinew and bone cannot tell a lie.
I refuse to speak.
These lungs and the air that escapes them have been steeped in the blackness of untruths.
Any breath taken or recieved is living proof.
And your lips and their softness slide across my neck like the tightning of a noose.
Bringing a little more death with every touch of love, of which I am unworthy.
As the darkness of night envelopes us,
as the quickness of your body and the force of your rhythm masks my unwanted pleasure,
I am helpless.
I lie, unprotected and powerless.
Thick soot billowing out from my lips
with each labored breath.
My truth is everywhere.
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 7 14
I remember, quite clearly,
the feeling of rain drops that were your fingertips,
sliding down my back;
the way the droplets curled around my hips
and soaked into the top of my jeans—
that has been burned into my brain.
And I remember, like it was yesterday,
the feeling of rose petals that were your tongue,
gliding their way across the landscape of my stomach
and floating between my tan skin and the softness of the cotton
hiding me from the rest of the world.
Still, I forget, as if it weren't real,
that you love me.
I can't seem to remember
I don't need drops of rain or the petals of roses.
I need only your fingertips and your mouth.
I need only a simple look; your eyes piercing mine.
I need only you.
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 6 17
It starts with a spark
A tiny kiss that barely brushes skin
Fingers like flames tickle the soft flesh just below your ear
Heated breath whispering embers of words
Billowing through the blackened air to melt my steel heart
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 14 28
I named her Alice.
Alice against her will.
She had forgotten the letters to her name
and the numbers to her age.
"But letters are so easily misplaced".
She said, shaking her head.
One can't disagree with that.
Simple when I found her.
"Numbers can come in any order"!
She exclaimed, quite matter-of-factly.
Her why's and you's got tangled.
Swirled together in a place she called,
How did I come to be so lucky?
"Why, you opened your eyes and looked".
She said, so simply.
Thoughts of her strangle me,
leave me gasping at truths,
straws and tight-rope-wire.
I clung to her hope, held on tight to
her sense of wonderment.
Imagination getting me
Every word leaving me
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 8 9
31 and Counting
Maybe it's because I can't remember what it feels like to be young
Or the fact that I can no longer make young women fall in love with me.
It could be that I haven't danced in longer than I care to think about
It may be that the red tank top I used to wear doesn't exactly fit the same way it used to.
I know things about myself now.
I've learned things,
forgotten things,
I have a serious case of the elevens
and my grey hairs are starting to take over the black.
I had an attitude and
sly, little smirk that could
melt hearts and
break them
just as easily.
I know things about myself now.
I repeat myself.
I don't listen like I used to.
I drink too much,
eat too much,
have sex too little and
a bit more
Just a few of the things
I dislike
about knowing who I am.
Just a few reasons to
hate growing older.
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 9 17
groundhog day
I'm in this place again
Pacing back and forth
Just waiting for you to see me.
And I know it's just a matter of time.
A moment or two before the yellow
in your eyes pierces right through me.
And I fall
Packing up.
A place for everything.
This ring, that ring.
My heart and yours.
There's a place for everything,
you say.
Train's leaving in an hour.
Tracks pulling me to a place I've never been.
Never wanted to go.
But I know it's over.
Nothing here for me.
No more air for me to breathe.
It's not the destination,
it's the journey,
you say.
But I know you.
You're a wonderful liar.
My wonderful sinner.
Every strand of hair is a lie.
Wave to me this morning with your eyes closed.
Better to see me with.
But only this morning.
A deep breath in,
a sigh of relief,
I will see you again.
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 6 15
Belief by Flermigan Belief :iconflermigan:Flermigan 4 21
I felt my soul leave
about 7 days before I died.
I was driving up 93 and
just happened to catch it
floating out the window.
There are moments when
you just
And I knew.
It was only a matter of time.
So few hours left to
say my goodbyes.
Say hellos I had been
meaning to say.
I love yous.
Only a blink of an eye
to tell the truth.
And the truth was
I hadn't really lived.
I tried, yes.
But this wasn't a
It was simply a
And maybe that was enough.
Looking out the window
that day,
in that car,
it was enough.
Closed my eyes,
rolled down the windows and felt
a sudden rush of air.
A breath from someone
else's screams.
Wake Up.
7 days left to finally
open these eyes.
Finally feel,
A week to make these
30 years worth
And then
The end of a life.
My life.
It took me 30 years
to finally figure out that
it could happen
to me.
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 11 24
Truth be told,
I've only had sex a handful of times.
Minus a digit or two.
I'm a child trapped inside a 30 year old's body.
I am honest.
truth be told,
am mostly fiction.
I take the fantasy of you and turn it
into a sex-soaked love affair that's never
Use imagination to make a
That is when they're best.
Recollection by
story telling.
It's always worked because I'm
scared of the reality.
It's harder than it seems.
These days,
it's harder than it seems.
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 10 18
Like Torture
Fingertip-poise and blood-soaked confidence.
She tears through my skin.
And she strips me bare.
She sees through my autumn eyes
and she knows
she knows me.
I love her and I
like the pain she brings.
I adore the screams in the night,
the clenched fists and teeth.
It's comforting to know that only she
can make me feel this
blood-lust sort of pain.
And I've heard she breathes fire.
And I know what they mean when they say
she's poison.
Pitch-fork tongue and eyes a color
not found in nature.
She is just my kind of poison.
The way she leaves me shaking
with just her words,
just a little
She is more than I could ever ask for
and something I will never truly have.
And I'll love her for the way she left me.
For the ways I will never leave her
breathing hard and covered in sweat and
wanting more.
I'll love her for never being mine.
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 8 41
Separately the same but
so different.
"But we all change",
you say,
with a smirk and a cigarette.
You tongue your teeth and
I know,
you're lying.
We breathed that same,
salty air all Summer.
You let me rest my
head on your shoulder
and I let you
fuck in my bed.
It's all the same.
A little give and a
little take.
8 hours asleep and back to the
back to the bottles.
More nicotine than oxygen
that was us.
Those were our rides.
Those were our
Our high pitched
Dylan harmonica
and sweet, little songs
we sang
to one another.
Our silly, naive
Dancer's hands,
freckle faced,
matching birth marks and
a time in our lives that
screamed intensity and
so fucking loud,
I think the whole world could hear it.
And I realize you're
I'm missing.
We will always have
that Summer.
Those slow days,
those crazy,
always midnight
We're still there.
We're just a bit
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 8 23
And she's pretty,
My God is she pretty.
But she lacks that,
sort of,
And her breath is almost,
But she doesn't have a song.
No, no sort of,
And those fingers, so soft,
like 5, long whisps of silk
But they lack any pattern.
There's no,
sort of,
Yet she charms me,
she has that,
sort of,
That just holds you
She is flawed and she is
just, sort of,
for me.
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 9 23
The Forts
With sun bursting through clouds it's harder to find your way. The hazy,
pin stripes paint the day in a yellow tinted mask that makes everywhere seem
like home.
And I know it's only a backdrop, yet I chase the setting star up Telegraph Hill. There,
I find the souls of men who shared my passion for the lighthouse and the city
it welcomes.
This is where I find my reason and this is where that reason becomes a life. The ocean,
my quill and my eyes fill with words of waves and salt water foam breaking on
the sand.
The rays soon give way to twinkles of light in a blackened sky. The haze,
turned to smokey wisps of fire spark flickers and midnight chants of the
Summer Solstice.
I know tomorrow will bring another sun, another day of greens and blues. The ocean,
her tides and unforgiving moon will again write a song that plays the night sky like
a harp.
Melodies of the start of a season and the beginning of new life continue on. Here,
where we find the melding of souls and the image of horses a
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 8 3
Her Story Pt. 1
         It happened months ago and I still hadn't cried. I mean, I still hadn't cried about it specifically. Maybe once or twice after a night of drinking but I don't think that counts. My Mom was the kind of woman that, if you didn't know her, you'd think her rude. You'd think she was one of those mean old ladies. She wasn't, though. She was selfless and funny. My Mother carried herself like Kathy Bates in Misery, but really, those of us who knew her, knew she was more like Kathy Bates in Titanic. The unsinkable Molly Brown. A woman that spoke her mind and cared more for other people than she ever would for herself. I think that's why she lasted so long, being so sick. I think she was living for me.
         I don't know everything about my Mother's life, in fact, I know very little. The things I do know make me believe she was a superhero. I suppose every kid thinks that of their mother. In my
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 10 17
On nights the sky brings the trees a red glow,
these are the nights I think of you.
Late January skies that scream
a remembrance of mid-October,
it's this cry that floods my mind
with you.
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 9 12
A Love Song
I've fashioned eyes from barbed wire
and I poke through whatever I can to see you.
Through the streams
and red
and sinew
I will finally see you.
It takes everything
so I do anything.
Screaming from the pain,
the pain of being unveiled.
Hopping the chained links
and slicing through flesh.
If that's what it takes.
That's what it takes.
And I know what they mean now
when they say,
"once in a blue moon".
I mean,
I get it
I get it
through you.
Wonderful colors just pierce through me
A washing of grey and a stab of
Mixed with the stainless steal
of my brown.
Our names are here
but we are not.
:iconflermigan:Flermigan 10 28

Random Favourites

A Journey
My dreams are overflowing
like this waterfall.
At the bottom I stand
bare feet firm on a
mossy rock as I hold
my hands out,
palms skyward,
hoping to catch what
needs to be
chased and pursued.
The water crashes and splashes
out to me.
Cool drops sink,
slipping between
my clenched fingers.
Cleanse me,
refresh me,
release me!
I ball my hands,
grasping it, but
each drop snakes
its way out and falls
to the moss or the river below.
As if in a dream,
I jump in,
diving at inspiration,
as the water soaks my soul.
Colorful fish dart away
like lightning but I
catch one in my
Its scales sparkle underneath
a pale moon as it wriggles.
It slips through but I
let it swim,
thinking all the while.
Where is it going?
My lungs strain,
struggling for air
that I won't find
down here.
Kicking off from the rocks below,
I resurface
and look around me,
hoping to see this forest
in a new light.
A silver ribbon
touches everything,
the moonlight's fingers
searching for the sun.
Oh, how it
:iconinnocencedivine:InnocenceDivine 3 3
Britt Face 2 by acireVI Britt Face 2 :iconacirevi:acireVI 5 14 Skuld by roflraffa Skuld :iconroflraffa:roflraffa 105 19
And after you left...
The rain ran down my body
As I stood outside your house
With bloodshot eyes
And crimson tears,
My heart torn up
Within my crushed ribcage
The butterflies dying painfully
In the torpid digestive juices of my stomach
And little pink hearts bleeding silently,
Crushed by passing cars,
In puddles at my feet.
:iconfavonian:favonian 3 4
She holds the key by kittynn She holds the key :iconkittynn:kittynn 295 1 trash by butter-a-fly trash :iconbutter-a-fly:butter-a-fly 9 16 Dark Elffin Fae by queenserpentine Dark Elffin Fae :iconqueenserpentine:queenserpentine 8 10 rhythm of life by kaasic rhythm of life :iconkaasic:kaasic 1 1 yay bananas by butter-a-fly yay bananas :iconbutter-a-fly:butter-a-fly 5 11 burned out by butter-a-fly burned out :iconbutter-a-fly:butter-a-fly 10 25 Get secure by 20th Get secure :icon20th:20th 1 1 015 ID by empatia 015 ID :iconempatia:empatia 340 49
Fairytale Dreams
I want to think we have the kind of love
The needs no word other than that
That, like in stories
We can simply bare our souls to each other
That crazy, romantic nonsense
About two spirits touching
Soul on soul searing together
Everything that makes us us
Emotional intimacy
That defies physical contact
More than talking and more than sex
The stuff of stories
That I know I'm just dreaming about
:iconjysella:Jysella 1 2



Add a Comment:
HimitsuUK Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2016   Photographer
Angie-Pictures Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2014
Thanks a lot for adding „Freshly showered“ to your favs :iconflowerheartplz: and Happy Easter. :iconeasterloveplz:  
Flermigan Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2014
It is gorgeous. You're very welcome.<3
Zaphod-Beeblebrox58 Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2014
Joyeuse Paques!...Happy Easter!
Flermigan Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2014
And a happy Easter to you, sir! <3
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