firekitty29

Here it is,my last post of 2012.Don't know what to say except thank you.Thank you to all my followers who have stayed with me through my spam and fangirling and emotional turmoil throughout this year.It's a gift,really to have you guys.And to the people I follow,I love you too.I look up to all of you.My followers and followees,I love you,you are all beautiful human beings and thank you for keeping me alive and well this year.I hope I live and laugh and cry with all of you in 2013.Even if I will probably meet you in person,I'm just saying it's an honor and a blessing to call you guys my followers.

Hey guys this is a lil entry on just how I love you all.To be honest,I don't know what I'd do without you.You're all amazing,all of you, haters included.I came on dA and Tumblr,trying to at least find some consolation and comfort and a little bit of sanity in life.I got that,and friends,real one snot like the fake ass ones I have over here.You all did ,more than you think you did,every time I get an ask in my ask box or have some fave my art,I feel the need to run up and down the block screaming 'people Love Me!!'.I'm like that because over here,I have no real friends or anybody that really cares about me.My parents just stress on my looks and grades,not much else.I went into depression some years ago and struggled with self harm and a short term bulimia that lasted a couple weeks.I was actually on the verge or suicide until you guys stepped in.Flooding me with the love I never got,the family and friends I never had.The only people who accept me for who I am and what I do.And yes haters,I'm talking to you too.And those who probably don't even know who I am.You guys brought me out of the dark and onto a road to recovery.So to dedicate my honor to you amazing and wonderful ladies and gentleman,I made up a song,even though words can't explain how you much you all mean to me,I thought this would be enough.Enjoy

'Darkness clouds my heart and soul,they left me here.Out in the cold.
Left me here in the cold without a hand to hold.
Never saw the light until you came.
Lonely,lost,faded,gone.But thanks to you I can live on.
I can live on,I can live on!!
You gave me wings to fly,told me never say die!!
So you took my hand and  said we'll go and burn the night!!
I've cried a river of tears,but you all took away me fears.
Cause you took my hand and said,lets go and burn the night!!
I try find myself,only to find out I was owned by the world.
I tried to find myself,since I was a little girl.
I hid in my mind,with the black sky.
Asking over and over why??Why??Why??WHy??Why??
You gave me wings to fly,told me never say die!!
So you took my hand and  said we'll go and burn the night!!
I've cried a river of tears,but you all took away me fears.
Cause you took my hand and said,lets go and burn the night!!
I never thought I know such people like you,
Your my bffs,my bros did I mention I love you??
When it was stormy in y heart you made it shine
You took my from a place called cloud nine.
Because you told me  go burn the night!!
You gave me wings to fly,told me never say die!!
So you took my hand and  said we'll go and burn the night!!
I've cried a river of tears,but you all took away me fears.
Cause you took my hand and said,lets go and burn the night!!
You gave me wings to fly,told me never say die!!
So you took my hand and  said we'll go and burn the night!!
I've cried a river of tears,but you all took away me fears.
Cause you took my hand and said,lets go and burn the night!!'


Sorry if its horrible.So lastly I would like to thank you all for being my friends and enemies.I  love you all and I hope you live the longest life ever humanly possible.

Thanks again

Well today I went out to the mall to get some clothes,you see I'm coming out of that pink and pandas style and finding my own personality and stuff.So now I usually go to Hot Topic and buy most of the goods from there.So after coming home my mom sees the bulging Hot Topic bag in my hands.She asks what's in there,I say clothes.So she tears the bag out my hands and basically curses out my clothes,saying they're nonsense and shit moms say and what not.She pretty much hates everything I do outside of school,so any time I write a poem or put on some First to Last she just loses it.She thinks everything I know and love is trash and that she would burn everything I had just to keep her from losing it.My point is that parents have to realize we're not going to be those little zombie that went with everything they said.No.We're all just finding ourselves to find out who we are and where we're going.My mom doesn't really worry about me,just my grades.I don't care really,I just need her to except the fact that I'm not that little anymore.I'm the big girl who sits in the back of class writing songs and drawing.If I just get her to accept me for who I am,that would be great.Any ideas on how to do that??Leave comments down below.Thanks for the help people

This week went pretty well I guess,not much happend.I drew some stuff,wrote some poetry,watched some TV and went out and got a deadmau5 hoodie for the hell of it.But the only thing weird is what happened yesterday.You see,there's this kid,David,he likes me and makes that pretty obvious,by always walking behind me and leaving me cheesy love notes.I tell him leave me alone because we're only friends and nothing more but that just seems to be egging him on.I've kept my distance but its not working either.And I'm already really low on status in school and I really don't need someone like him dragging me down.But the point is,yesterday at the end of school he gave me a little something,it was a song to be exact.Called 'Run Away With Me'.Most girls would be so happy that a guy would write songs for them,or so I assume.But it kinda pissed me off.So I crumpled it up and stepped on it.And I saw him watching me,the kid ran away,he looked pretty sad.But I honestly don't care.Or didn't.Now I'm just a walking pile of guilt.It's not that I don't like him,its that I'm just scared.Scared that he's gonna see that darker side.Scared that he was like the last kid who liked me but only wanted me for my body.I mean I've never been truly loved before,I don;t know what it feels like.I don't know what to do or what to say to him,should I beat him up or just kindly tell him that I'm not interested??Or just let him love me??I honestly don't know.So I'm asking all you anons or watchers or the rest of dA,their take on this and what they think I should do.I know I sound like a little weirdo but just tell me what to do.I really need the help…

Now this is a rant for all those who hate Skrillex or his music.If you like Skrillex your good,but to the haters who tell him 'eat shit and fucking die' on his Facebook,sit your butt down and listen.

Sonny grew up knowing his entire biological family, but knowing them as friends, having no idea they were related to him. He was only 16 when he found out he was adopted and he'd known his biological family his whole life.
He was sent to boarding school.
He said in an interview he grew up in an area where the only real socializing he did was going to gigs, music was all he had.
He's struggled with bulimia.
He's struggled with self-harm.
He's struggled with depression.
He's struggled with self-hatred.
He's  still in a battle with himself over low self-esteem, low confidence and a negative self-image, which he's trying to overcome.
He's been through shit with record labels.
He had to make a name for himself all over again after leaving FFTL, with no help from his label.
As soon as he made a name for himself, his label found a loop-hole to get him back, doing what he didn't want to do.
He's had albums and songs he'd spent a lot of time on stolen from him.
This is just the tip of the iceberg. The fact that he still puts so much into what he does, he still cares about his fans so much, he still has a huge smile on his face every fucking day, he still manages to love his life, love what he does, have no bitterness, personally I think it's pretty fucking amazing.
So don't sit there saying he has it easy. Until you've lived life in his footsteps, you don't know what you're talking about.

I live with self harm,I hate myslef,I'm depressed and everything else except bulimia.My parents hate me,I have no friends nobody really gives two shits about me.But I sill manage to go out every morning with a smile on my face,come on here a treat you guys like my bestest friends,despite my life.I might not have money,I might not be Skrillex,but I suffer like he has in a few ways,cpoy and paste if you feel the same way or almost the same