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Funko Spyro by Evilhumour-Author Funko Spyro :iconevilhumour-author:Evilhumour-Author 2 0
Literature
Death is forced to take a vacation: Chapter Nine
I walked straight up to the castle of the royal family, with the map that had fallen into my head leading me to an out of the way office, where a stallion was looking out at me.
“Who are you and how did you get in here?” he asked me, frowning as he started to push himself up from his chair.
“Fall Harvest, sir,” I said, bowing my head. “I’m here for the new gardner position.”
His frown deepened, staring harder at me. “How did you hear about this; I only started posting news for this opening yesterday.”
“I have good eyes and ears, sir,” I told him. “I listened when somepony told me about the opening earlier today and I wish to apply.”
He continued to stare at me before shaking his head and walked past me. “Follow me, kid,” he said snappishly, leading me out a very long and dull path that made me think he was trying to lose me or something. Little did he know that I was determined to have this job an
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Literature
Death is forced to take a vacation: Chapter Eight
For the next little while, I began to learn how to do my job more and more, with me splitting myself up to cover multiple deaths that were happening at once while exploring the alicorn kingdom now that I could do so without having to worry about money, food, class or anything like that.
“You were exploring the alicorn kingdom?” Twilight asked, tilting her head while looking at Helheim. “I thought she-”
“Lady Helheim,” both Fall and Causality interjected, causing Helheim to roll her eyes that she formed for that sole purpose.
“I mean, Lady Helheim didn’t want to be known so…”
“Back then, I had more trust in my Reapers to behave themselves so I allowed them to be in the mortal realm,” she said with Fall looking off to the side recluntently.
Twilight licked her lips, seemingly understanding the situation enough that she didn’t have to ask for more details.
As I was saying, I took the time to really explore
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Literature
Death is forced to take a vacation: Chapter Seven
We rematerialized in a place that, like the homes of the majority of Draconequui throughout the multiverse, is hard for somepony without their point of view to describe. But it was Causality’s dominion, the place from which she kept an eye on all their kind. In some cases literally. Don’t give me that look, Causality. My memory may not be perfect, but I will never forget how you were using a plush draconequus as a cushion for a giant fake eyeball back then. Partly because it was still there the last time I visited you!
Anyway, Causality was lounging on a couch attached to the ceiling when we arrived. She drifted down to greet us, with her grinning somehow. I would later learn that I was not really seeing her skull grin but more of a grin on her soul.
“What?” Twilight asked, tilting her head upwards. “A grin on her soul?”
“Yeah,” Causality said as she scooped up some popcorn into her mouth. “What you see isn’t act
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Literature
Death is forced to take a vacation: Chapter Six
It all began on a muggy fall morning, with me doing what I always did back then: working on the harvest. I woke up with the rest of the workers, did my usual morning routine, then headed out to see where we’d be assigned by the day manager, old Green Lake, to bring the crops-
“Wait, you were with normal ponies?” Twilight interrupted.
Fall Harvest let out a sort of barking laugh. “This was the kingdom of the alicorns, remember? It’s not like Equestria today; there were no pegasi, earth ponies or unicorns in that area, just alicorns. The other tribes all lived off in their own kingdoms apart from us for reasons I can’t remember now, but it probably seemed like a good idea to all sides at the time. I was just a normal alicorn citizen and back then, that meant I had to find work even if I was sick.”
“Hold on partner, you were sick and they let y’all work?” Applejack asked incredulously.
“They needed ponies to work the field
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Literature
Death is forced to take a vacation: Chapter Five
With a sigh, Fall began to make his way towards Twilight’s castle, ignoring the cries of the Ladies of Loyalty, Kindness, Generosity, Honesty and Laughter behind him. He only had a short amount of time before Twilight did something he would regret like calling her former mentor and kicking that hornet’s nest wide open.
“Ah said stopthere partner!” Applejack hollered at him as she tried to keep up with his pace; he was impressed by her determination, but knew she was doomed to failure: only another Death, or perhaps a Space, could keep up with a Death; he had heard of one time that some speedster had run to the end of their universe; the Reaper in charge of speedsters had followed him, only to run into the edge of time and, due to the lack of a universe after that point, had ceased to be, thus freeing their Power to pass on to another while the speedster they’d followed had run safely back to their own time period.
Pushing her words out
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Literature
Death is forced to take a vacation: Chapter Four
Following Pinkie into Sugarcube Corner, Fall looked at the menu and began to see what he could get to eat quickly and be out of Ponyville before word about him got out. It would be a terrible vacation if he had to look over his shoulders the entire time for the sun about to set his flesh on fire.
“Hey Harvest, is the trip you’re going on long?” Rainbow Dash asked him, causing him to refocus on the world around him.
“Oh yeah, pretty long, very far away,” he muttered still distracted before he realized what he had said.
“Oooo, we need to get you something big then, Harversty,” Pinkie Pie said, causing him to sigh internally at his slip.
“There’s no ne-” Fall began only for Pinkie Pie to disappear on him with Rainbow Dash dragging him off to a booth that was thankfully not in view of the street.
Settling down into his booth, he noticed it was really out of the way and the ma
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Literature
Death is forced to take a vacation: Chapter Three
Fall Harvest had a million different thoughts going through his head, mainly how to escape this situation but nothing came up that wouldn’t raise any flags. He knew that he would have to run fast before word got back to Princess Celestia that he had resurfaced and she started to burn down the countryside looking for him. And depending on how enraged she was, he just might have Hollow Grave appear by him and start smacking him upside the head for increasing her workload.
Then again, she might just do it for the fun of it. He knew he would bug himself if he was her; he could be such an asshole at times.
Wait…
“Is everythin’ okay, partner?” Applejack asked, tilting her head up at him.
“Oh yeah, everything is fine, perfectly fine, fine as could be!” he said with the mare giving him a flat look that told him he needed to work on his lies.
“Great!” His vision was suddenly nothing but pink. “
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Literature
Death is forced to take a vacation: Chapter Two
Fall Harvest debated whether or not he should go stop Apple Bloom from getting her sister involved. On one hoof, it might solve a lot of future headaches and issues and problems that would no doubt arise from being in Ponyville.
But on the other hoof, he was on vacation, being visible was not a massive issue. He shouldn’t have to work that hard if he was sent to enjoy himself on his down time, right?
Then again, it wasn’t the smartest ide-
“See sis; he’s an alicorn!” Apple Bloom shouted, causing Harvest to snap his head up as the two ponies came rushing towards him.
“No I’m not,” he said automatically, with enough conviction it was almost believable.
“But,” Applejack blinked, trying to reconcile his claims with what she could see with her own two eyes. “You’ve got wings and a horn; what else could ya be?”
“I, my good mare, am a winged
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Literature
Death is forced to take a vacation: Chapter One
Helheim, Lady of Death of this dimension, was perusing her dominion, checking the souls that were set to be tortured when a demon came to her side. She cast her eye down at the beast, and while she could just get what she wanted through touching its mind, Helheim decided to use a voice in this occasion.
“What seems to be the problem?” she asked, using the voice of a former mass murderer instead of her own voice.
“Mistress Hollow Grave is complaining about Master Fall Harvest again,” the demon said in a grating tone that also carried the unease of having to pass this message along, its claws scraping the ground awkwardly.
Helheim let out a sigh in her own voice, shaking her head at her ancient Reaper. At least it was not Nidhogg as those fights were never pretty but then again, Harvest always managed to get under her proverbial skin along with the rest of her Reapers.
“Is he in his dominion?” she asked the demon which it nodded.
“Yes, Mistress H
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Literature
Apple Coloured Rainbow: Omake Chapter One
The alternate reaction…
“Sit you two, we need to have a talk,” Granny Smith said sternly. Gulping, they made their way to their chairs.
“First things first,” she told them when they’d sat down. “Ah don’t mind ya gettin’ together… but could ya not do it when the rest of the family’s goin’ to be around?”
Blitz’s jaws dropped, then he straightened himself out and threw her his best salute. “Ma’am, yes Ma’am!”
“Then we’re good.” Granny stood back with a smile on her face.
“So… yer not mad?” Applejack asked hesitantly.
“Sakes alive, you think Ah’m mad over this?” Granny waved her hands. “It’s obvious he’s crazy over ya and ya both plan to make this last. Now, Ah’m no fool, an’ Ah know Blitz here ain’t yer first rodeo, but at least yer nothin’ lahk Apple Brandy back in Rainbow Falls.
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Mature content
Apple Coloured Rainbow: Chapter Four, Mature :iconevilhumour-author:Evilhumour-Author 0 0
Mature content
Apple Coloured Rainbow: Chapter Two, Mature :iconevilhumour-author:Evilhumour-Author 1 0
Mature content
Apple Coloured Rainbow: Chapter Five :iconevilhumour-author:Evilhumour-Author 1 0
Literature
Apple Coloured Rainbow: Chapter Four, Clean
“And that’s what we need to do, Blitz,” Blaze said as the pair did a slow circuit in the air. “Or what you need to do; we just need to work on the timing when we spread out from Fire and Glide’s burst from the start and then make sure we are parallel Silver and Surprise when we do our spins.”
“Right,” Blitz said while mentally visualizing what he would need to do - he’d be flying behind and below Glide, while Silver Zoom was doing the same above, and midway through the routine they’d fly in spins to meet one another in midair and change sides to do the whole thing in reverse but faster. And of course, Firestorm, Blaze and Surprise would be mirroring them on the other side of the arena.
After that part, Blitz knew things got a lot easier for him as there were less critical stunts, though they still required making precise timing with his partners. What he mainly had to worry about at that point was flying in sync
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Literature
Apple Coloured Rainbow: Chapter Three
Rainbow Blitz dropped his duffle bag beside his seat as he leaned back into his chair after waving goodbye to Applejack, sighing as he rubbed his face.
Despite Applejack saying she was fine with him being away for their first anniversary and the fact that he knew she wasn’t lying to him, Blitz felt terrible about being away.
As much as he hated to, Blitz knew that he would need to push AJ out of his head soon so he could focus on the show and mentally prepare himself to get ready for all the tricks he would need to do with Blaze.
She was a good Bolt that relied on speed and agility for her stunts, which Blitz could respect immensely. Sure she wasn’t a star like Firestorm or Glide or Fleetfoot but she was still an impressive flyer nonetheless.
And despite how good he was, Blitz knew he was still too new on the field to be considered a big star and had quite a ways to go before he could stand next to his idols in front of the cheering crowds.
Reaching int
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I walked straight up to the castle of the royal family, with the map that had fallen into my head leading me to an out of the way office, where a stallion was looking out at me.

“Who are you and how did you get in here?” he asked me, frowning as he started to push himself up from his chair.

“Fall Harvest, sir,” I said, bowing my head. “I’m here for the new gardner position.”

His frown deepened, staring harder at me. “How did you hear about this; I only started posting news for this opening yesterday.”

“I have good eyes and ears, sir,” I told him. “I listened when somepony told me about the opening earlier today and I wish to apply.”

He continued to stare at me before shaking his head and walked past me. “Follow me, kid,” he said snappishly, leading me out a very long and dull path that made me think he was trying to lose me or something. Little did he know that I was determined to have this job and was very stubborn so I kept up with him all the way until we got outside. He turned around in surprise that I was still there but he tilted his head to beckon me on forwards to a more secluded part of the gardens that was highly unkept and had a large hedge that was begging for somepony to turn it into a sculpture.




Causality made a large coughing sound that suspiciously had the noise of ‘dork’ in it, and Fall Harvest gave her a pointed look while the mares began to snicker.




“Okay, let me see what you can do,” he told me, tilting his head towards all of the mess, not that he needed to as it was really annoying for me to see. With my horn glowing in my alive magic color, I began to fix up the garden, adding my own personal touches to it while I trimmed down that darn hedge into something more appropriate and don’t ‘cough’ again Causality, I know how it sounds and you don't need to say it.

The head of the grounds, Hedge Clipper, kept his eyes on me as I did my work, finishing with making the hedge much smaller; despite how much I wanted to fix it up into something more fancy-looking, I needed to show I could be reasonable.

He kept quiet the entire time until I was finished and placed my tools to the side, giving him a hopeful look as he began to inspect my work. He got low to the ground, muttering to himself as he made his way slowly around the garden before he stopped at the hedge with a ruler levitating in his magic. He placed it on the hedge and leaned in close before shaking his head which was when I started to get worried.

“It’s fair,” he said, turning to face me. “You managed to tame the ground and flowers fine, albeit not to our standards and the hedge is uneven.” I must have frowned or something because he softened his eyes at me. “But it is good for somepony as young as you and you are the first to truly apply for this position.” He then frowned at me again and flicked his wings. “How did somepony as young and talented as you wind up needing this position?”

I froze as I wasn’t expecting this line of questioning even though it made perfect sense for him to ask me that. Still, I was very talented at lying my plot off so I said, “To be honest, good sir, I was sick for a long time when I was younger so I had a lot of time on my hooves to tend my craft, and you can see the results, yes?”

He looked at me, taking a step backwards. “Are you healthy now, kid?”

“Of course, sir,” I took a deep breath in to show that I could. “I can promise you that I would not ever get ill or sick if you do hire me.”

He continued to look at me, shifting on his hooves as he tried to decide what to do with me. “You have your own residence, I presume; we do not have room for any colt that will get underhoof and we do not wish to see any indecency if I choose to take you on.”

“I promise you sir that I would do nothing of the sort; you can trust me to do my job without fault or any issue whatsoever,” I promised him, holding my hoof out to him.

He shifted on his hooves before he sighed, and shook his head. “I will let you on for a week to see how you do; if you do well, we will see if we keep you; we might even assign you a place here.”

“Thank you sir,” I said, a smile breaking out on my face with him doing the same. “I am ready to work right now, sir.”

“Good lad,” Clipper said as he placed his hoof on my shoulder. “Come, let me show you more of the grounds and what will be your assigned area to tend to.”

From that I-




Fall,” Causality whined, sprawling outwards on the floor. “You’re not going to bore us with a yammering story about how you started to weed the grounds, are you?”

Fall blinked, a hoof raised in the air. “...Maybe?” Causality let out a louder groan, throwing her skull backwards.

“Come on, it can’t be that important, right?” Dash asked. “I mean, about the only one here who actually cares about that sort of thing is Applejack, and maybe Fluttershy, since I know she’s got a small garden of her own for some of her animals.”

“Ya pardner, and no offense, Ah kinda want to hear you and the princess got together,” Applejack said, her eyebrow raised.

Fine,” Fall pouted, crossing his arms across his chest. “I’ll condense it, seeing that none of you care about gardening.”

“Very astute, Fall Harvest,” Helheim said with Fall huffing loudly.




Well, as nobody - pony or otherwise - cares about my time as a gardner, I’ll summarize it. I kept to my area more or less for the first week, with Clipper keeping an eye on me, giving me a few praises and a couple of critiques - stay quiet Causality, you wanted me to skip this part so you don’t get to interject now.

During that week, I saw Celestia from a distance mostly, nearly every time from her window. No wait, not like that; I mean I saw her through the window of the room she was in when she was working with her tutors and a few times in the window of her bedroom.

Even glimpsing her was a jolt of joy for me back then, but from both what is simply proper and a rule of my employment, I never really did anything to attract her attention.

Or so I thought.

One day, I was tending a small garden at the base of her tower; a small inlet really that had a tiny fountain, a few flower beds and a couple of other stuff, but I guess you’re not really interested in all of that. As I was saying, I was working in the field when I heard somepony coughing. Looking around me, I couldn’t spot the pony so I went to pick up my tools when I heard some more coughing.

Flicking my ears upwards, and I looked up to see Celestia stretch her head out of the window, leaning on the sill and looking down at me. “Hello down there,” she called out with a singsong tone.

“And hello up there,” I called back and due to her smile and the tone of her voice, I stupidly said, “Do you get a joy out of seeing those below you getting dirty for you?”

A moment later, I froze, my mouth hanging open as I realized what I had just said to her and was terrified that I had completely ruined my chances with her when Celestia started to laugh.

“Oh my father’s stars, that was horrible,” Celestia snickered before she launched herself out of the window and flew down in a graceful spiral before landing in front of me.

“Well, along with me being good with my hooves at digging this fine dirt, I am even better at verbal fertilizer,” I said without thinking again, and Celestia laughed more.

“You are awful,” she chuckled, clicking her tongue. “My name is Celestia, my good pony. And yo-”

“Really, I thought your name was Rose, young lady,” I said, picking one up with my magic. I leaned in close to examine it before I flashed her a grin and levitated the rose over to her. “Both are extremely beautiful after all.”

“Flatterer,” she said, taking the rose and batting her eyes at me. “Now, what is your name?”

“Fall Harvest,” I said, dipping my head to her. “I am the new gardner.”

“So I’ve seen,” she said, walking past me, examining the garden which I should have realized was her garden. “You've done a fair job here, mister Harvest.”

“Thank you very much, Celestia,” I said, and as per usual without thinking. She turned to face me as I hadn't used her proper title but she didn’t seem offended or anything.

“I should thank you, for taking care of my private garden,” she said, looking at the bed of rhododendrons and smiled. “The rhododendrons are really blooming; they usually don't do well.”

“That’s why I put a lot of attention on it,” I said, moving next to her with our sides brushing against each other briefly. “I didn’t want them to die and have you disappointed in me.”

“It is perfectly okay, mister Harvest-”

“Please, I prefer Fall,” I said with her giving me a smile. “Mister makes me feel so old.”

“I completely understand; being called princess all the time makes me far older than I am,” she said and then sighed sadly. “You cannot possibly imagine all the duties and responsibilities ponies expect of me.”

I frowned to hear her so sad and shook my head. “I can only guess,” I said as I pawed the ground - not hard enough to dig up the grass, luckily.

She let out another sigh before looking at me. “Thank you again for making this area so peaceful for me, mister Harv-, I mean Fall. I need to get back soon to eat lunch.” Her eyes darted to her room when I made my mind up.

“Wait; give me a moment. I know of this good little café, I will be right back,” I said to her with Celestia giving me a raised eyebrow.

“All right,” Celestia said to me, causing me to spread my wings and take off. I waited until I was out of sight before I teleported away to the place I’d told Celestia about, and quickly made my way into it and placed an order for the tastiest sandwich they had. On a whim, I bought her a tasty dessert as well. I didn’t know if she liked them but it wouldn’t hurt to try and it would be a nice gesture.

I then made my way back to the castle and to Celestia's private garden, only to see that she was gone. Frowning in disappointment, I was thinking that she had stood me up when I heard Celestia talking above me, to one of her tutors I thought. Turning my head upwards, I saw her back in her room, talking to somepony I couldn’t see. She turned her head in time to see me for a brief second before looking back into her room.

Seeing that she couldn’t come down, I placed the food I’d gotten her under the bench and placed a spell that would prevent others from seeing it except for Celestia. I then got back to work, tending to the grounds with a whistle on my lips while simultaneously doing a light review of my other selves taking in souls from the kingdom. I was doing a better job at reaping and hadn’t bungled up recently in what I said to them; and in the recent weeks, that bastard Kelvik had been telling me that he felt, based on what he’d seen, like I was made for this position. At the time, getting those types of compliments from other reapers, and especially from him, meant the world to me.

Still, what kept my attention was the hope that Celestia would have taken the food I got her. The next day, I went over to the bench and found the lunch I got her was gone. I then heard a singing voice from above. Flicking my head upwards, I saw that Celestia was there humming a song from her window, looking down at me with a smile on her face.

Smiling back at her, I tipped my head towards her, knowing that I’d made the first right step.
Death is forced to take a vacation: Chapter Nine

There are many Reapers, those who monitor the souls of the living and guide them into the realms of the Dead. Now, one is being forced to take a break from his duties. Sent into the land of Equestria until further notice, he meets with one of his charges.

This is the story of Fall Harvest, the Death of Alicorns… and the past he will reveal to Princess Twilight Sparkle.


Chapter Eight | Chapter Ten



A story brought to you by :iconanonemousejr: and myself, part of the Harvest-Verse of the Powers That Be Multiverse.


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For the next little while, I began to learn how to do my job more and more, with me splitting myself up to cover multiple deaths that were happening at once while exploring the alicorn kingdom now that I could do so without having to worry about money, food, class or anything like that.




“You were exploring the alicorn kingdom?” Twilight asked, tilting her head while looking at Helheim. “I thought she-”

“Lady Helheim,” both Fall and Causality interjected, causing Helheim to roll her eyes that she formed for that sole purpose.

“I mean, Lady Helheim didn’t want to be known so…”

“Back then, I had more trust in my Reapers to behave themselves so I allowed them to be in the mortal realm,” she said with Fall looking off to the side recluntently.

Twilight licked her lips, seemingly understanding the situation enough that she didn’t have to ask for more details.




As I was saying, I took the time to really explore the world that I never got to know. It was amazing how many fancy parties I got to observe now that I didn’t look like a starving poor colt and I was really settling to my new life with Causality, George and my fellow Reapers helping out. As well as Lady Helheim, of course.

I was walking with George, the Reaper of Griffons, down a street while he was telling me about some of his past clients and how to handle large crowds of souls that were still hostile to each other when we hit a massive crowd of bodies that blocked the main street. Normally, we would have to push and fight our way to front if we were mortals but as who we are, we just made the crowds part for us using some of our gifts that make mortals skittish around death. Within a few seconds we were at the front of the crowd, just behind some of the guards that were holding everyone back. Even though George was a Reaper, he still got some suspicious looks as he was a griffon.

Craning our heads out as to see what had every-




“Hey, what does he look like?” Rainbow Dash asked, causing everypony in the room to groan. “What? I’m curious.” She said defensively.

Helheim snorted before replying, “Like a griffon. Eagle Vulture head, body like a puma. Fairly big for his body type. And much better looking in death than the half-starved state he spent most of his life in. Great guy, but terrible hunter. I do hope he is happy with his paradise.”

Rainbow Dash blinked and shrugged. “Cool, thanks.”

Can I continue, now?” Fall sniped loudly, causing the mare to wince a bit.




We were craning our necks out to see what caught everyone’s attention when the crowd began to really push forwards with the guards pushing them back.

“Look, Fall,” George said to me, with neither of us worried about being overheard. “Look at their livery.”

I leaned forwards and began to see beyond the markings of the royal family. I could see additional and personal liveries in place on their uniforms; such as the scale of the king or the Crossed Sabers of the queen, but the sun and moon were new to me.

“Yeah, I do-” I froze as I saw both the king and queen in one carriage with their daughters in the next one behind them. The younger one was Luna; I knew that much back then even when I was alive. She was a dark coated filly, like midnight blue dark and looked completely bored.

Of course what caught my eye was Celestia; she was so beautiful even then. I remember that moment perfectly well; she was sitting on a velvet cushion next to her sister. Her coat was a striking white colour, dazzling in the morning day with a flowing pink mane that sparkled like jewels and when her eyes flicked past me, I felt my legs go limp.

It took me a bit before I realized that George was snickering loudly as he led me away from the front line of the crowd. “What, what’s so funny?”

“Nothing kid, absolutely nothing,” he grinned, clicking his beak. “Just going to guess that you never saw a mare when you were alive, did ya?”

I snorted and bumped my side into his. “Of course I did,” I said, rolling my eyes. “There were those who ran the workers hut during the time I worked at Lord Apple’s farms and there was the-”




“Wait, did yah just say Lor’ Apple,” Applejack suddenly spoke up. “As in, an alicorn who was part of mah family?”

Fall nodded. “A lot of ponies nowadays have relatives in the old alicorn kingdom. Your family was no exception. In fact, I...” his raised hoof hovered where it was, his face suddenly sad before he dropped the limb to the floor with a loud clop before he cleared his throat. “Never mind, let me continue.”




What was I saying? Oh yeah.

“And there was Lord... I don’t remember, who had several mares running the kitchen and-”

“That’s not what I meant, kid,” George said, rolling his eyes at me as he fluffed his feathers. “I meant one that was your own age.” He turned his to the side before adding in. “Your own mortal age when you were alive, of course.”

I blinked, my ears tilting to the side as I thought of it. “Not really, I mean there were a few that did exist but they were just as busy as me working in the fields.”

He let out a sigh, shaking his head at me. “Before Freya or Causality gets involved; just going to guess you were never in love, were you?”

“Well, no,” I admitted. “Never really had the opportunity. I was always busy working, just trying to get by.” I then stopped and looked at him as what he said kicked into my head. “Wait what? Me and her. Come on, I mean sure, she’s absolutely stunning and any colt would be lovestruck by her but I don’t have a chance with her!”

“Oh, and why’s that?” George asked him with a grin on his face, sitting down.

“Because I’m me and she’s her?” I said, pointing out the obvious.

“You mean you’re an Adjunct to a Power and she’s a daughter of a Power?” he said, waving his talon as if to encourage me to say more.

“Well yes but still, she’s all that,” I tilted my head towards the procession of the royal family and then gestured to myself. “And I’m…” I trailed off, looking at the dirt and grime and was acutely aware of how… not poor, per say but underprivileged I was when I was alive. How nothing I was and how low that made me feel.

“You’re what?” George prompted me, snapping me back into focus.

“I’m not, George,” I said, my body drooping a bit.

“Kid, need I remind you that you’re not that anymore?” George said, slapping my arm. “You’re in better shape than you ever were, you’ll stay that way until the end of all existence, and you’ve got a position of power and responsibility now that you’ll have until it’s time for you to retire.”

“I know, I know,” I said, shaking my head.” But still...”

“So why don’t you griff up and see her?”

“She’s still royalty, and I’m… well, I was a civilian,” I shot back. “How would it look to the rest of the ponies around here if some random guy came out of the crowd to talk to her? Not to mention that the guards would probably assume I was a threat and jump me and then the whole nature of who I am would get out and cause a massive incident or something.”

“Then don’t be an idiot about it,” George snappeed. “Your talent is growing stuff. Get a job there and see if you can get chance to meet her.”

“I don’t know, sounds kinda wrong to me,” I said, shaking my head. “False pretence and all that. Besides, I don’t know if Lady Helheim would approve of it.”

“She doesn’t care all that much as long as we keep to our tasks.” George countered, shaking his head. “In fact, it would show how much you’ve come if you could continue to handle all the differents souls you need to collect while keeping a cover life here.”

“You really think Lady Helheim would approve of this?”

“Yes, I would,” Lady Helheim said, causing both of us to jump in surprise. She was accompanied by...




“Hey Fall, you okay?” Causality asked with concern, placing her claw and hoof on Fall’s shoulders.

“I’m okay, it’s just been a very long time since I last thought of him.” Fall replied with Helheim looking incredibly angry for a moment, the expression on her face so dark that it cowed anyone from speaking up.




Lady Helheim and he were standing front of me. Kelvik smiled at me and I smiled at hm. Back then, we were very close friends, a reflection of how the alicorns and the centaur kingdoms were close to each other. Anyway, Lady Helheim gestured towards him. “Kelvik works openly with the royal family of the centaur kingdom, mostly with Prince Tirek and his brother Scorpan.”




Jaws dropped all over the room at that.

So did a few copies of Jaws, and Fluttershy looked at Discord, who did his best to look innocent. “What? You know I can’t resist a good pun!”

Fluttershy shook her head in amusement. “Oh, Discord…”

“You give us a bad name, Discord,” Causality grumbled at him.

“At least this time it was a harmless prank,” Twilight interjected as she levitated the books off to the side, clearly planning to look at them more closely later. “Still, Kelvik worked directly with Tirek? How…”

“Tirek had lusted for power from a young age, even before he caught Kelvik’s eye,” Helheim put in from where she was manifesting. “He learned of a hermit who called himself Sendak the Elder, who taught him some dark skills and later figured out how to steal pony magic; he was the one who showed Tirek how to do so as well.”

“Then… this Sendak, he’s the reason Tirek came to Equestria and tried to steal our magic all those years ago?” Twilight looked aghast. “Please tell me we don’t have to worry about him escaping and causing trouble for us too.”

“It is my fault for being too trusting back then that I did not investigate the then Lord of Magic’s concerns about Tirek as Kelvik assured me the centaurs were, for the most part, interested only in peace,” Helheim said. “King Vorak, in particular. He strongly disapproved of Tirek’s ambitions when he learned about them and ordered Sendak imprisoned for his crimes against the pony kingdoms; the hermit reportedly died in the mines not long after, but by then it was too late to stop what had been set in motion. If more had been done…”

Twilight’s eyes darted from Helheim to Fall Harvest who was glowering angrily, pawing deep grooves into the floor and any further questions she had died as it seemed to be only enraging him further.

“I see,” she said quietly. “Go on then.”




Right. Well, that was before I knew what kind of person he really was, so at the time I was willing to gladly accept his advice and follow in his hoofsteps.

“I feel it would do you good to learn how to work the mortals and addressing this absent area of your knowledge would be very beneficial,” Helheim told me. “So I want you to go the castle, and explain that you are a young gardener that is seeking employment.”

I flinched as a wave of information was put into my head; all the necessary information that I would need to say to the guards had just been provided by Lady Helheim. While I wasn’t all that confident in this plan, I would never argue with Lady Helheim and-




HA!” Helheim laughed loudly before she coughed and waved Fall on.




As I was saying, I would never argue with Lady Helheim and trust her decisions without question. So I bowed my head and made my way to the castle to get a job.
Death is forced to take a vacation: Chapter Eight

There are many Reapers, those who monitor the souls of the living and guide them into the realms of the Dead. Now, one is being forced to take a break from his duties. Sent into the land of Equestria until further notice, he meets with one of his charges.

This is the story of Fall Harvest, the Death of Alicorns… and the past he will reveal to Princess Twilight Sparkle.


Chapter Seven | Chapter Nine



A story brought to you by :iconanonemousejr: and myself, part of the Harvest-Verse of the Powers That Be Multiverse.


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We rematerialized in a place that, like the homes of the majority of Draconequui throughout the multiverse, is hard for somepony without their point of view to describe. But it was Causality’s dominion, the place from which she kept an eye on all their kind. In some cases literally. Don’t give me that look, Causality. My memory may not be perfect, but I will never forget how you were using a plush draconequus as a cushion for a giant fake eyeball back then. Partly because it was still there the last time I visited you!

Anyway, Causality was lounging on a couch attached to the ceiling when we arrived. She drifted down to greet us, with her grinning somehow. I would later learn that I was not really seeing her skull grin but more of a grin on her soul.




“What?” Twilight asked, tilting her head upwards. “A grin on her soul?”

“Yeah,” Causality said as she scooped up some popcorn into her mouth. “What you see isn’t actually my real skeleton but more of a projection of what I would be doing if I still had any kind of body. This,” she waved her velociraptor claw to herself. “Is partly my magic, partly Lady Helheim’s magic making an impression of that’s projected outwards to all the senses.”

“Yes,” Fall said, eyes darting to the mist person. “We might be able to change what we look like but our power comes from Helheim.”

“So, I could change myself into anything I want to and Fall here too if he wasn’t wearing his original bones,” Causality said as she tossed some popcorn towards Fall who managed to snatch it before it fell onto the ground, showing the two had done this in the past many times. “Moo-yah!” She laughed, holding out her left cow’s hoof to Rainbow Dash, who high hoofed it back. “And before you ask, Twilight, Fall using his bones, or any others, gives him the power that creature had.”

There was a loud whack and the two Reapers were suddenly holding their heads. “And before these two Reapers of mine speak any further, let me remind them of what was supposed to the actual conversation.”

“Sorry my Lady,” they both mumbled, looking sheepish.




“Hey again, new guy,” she said to me before turning to look at Lady Helheim. “Let me guess, you want me to show him the ropes?”

“That is what we talked about, Causality,” Lady Helheim said, causing the thing - oh, alright, if it would stop it with the glares - causing the draconequus to fold and nod her head. “Fall Harvest, I leave you in her most capable of hands.”

And with that, she was gone, leaving me alone with Causality.

“Okay new guy, first things first,” she said, clapping her claw and hoof together. “Might not have heard of what I am or seen my kind as there are very few left and can be extremely territorial of what they consider to be theirs. You more than likely will see some ponies that died due to them trying to get in between a draconequus and their ponies.” She giggled as she directed me to someplace where I could sit down even though it was on the wall.

“So your kind is called draconequus?” I asked her, causing Causality to jolt and then faceclaw.

“Yeah; that’s what mine are called,” she said, shaking her head. “Now to the other stuff; you.”

“Me?”

“Yes,” she said in the same calm tone that Light Peanut had. “You saw him send your body here, right?”

“Yes…” I was confused.

“Well, how do you think you are still appearing as this?” she asked me gently, causing my eyes to widen.

“I -I- I don’t know,” I stammered in greater confusion, looking at myself.

“Hey, relax there, new guy,” she hushed me, placing her claw and hoof on me. “It’s one of the better ways to break the news to new guys like yourself. This here is just a projection of what you should look like if you still had flesh. Come, look at yourself.”

She directed me to a mirror where I could see my reflection and I frowned at what I saw. “That’s not me,” I said, tilting my head to the side.

“Yes it is, Fall,” she told me, clapping me on the back. “You were pretty sick and malnourished when you died. This is what you should have looked like if you were healthy.”

I looked back in the mirror and placed my hoof on it. I was a head taller, and my entire body had become more fully built - I wasn’t muscle-bound by any means, but I was no longer thin enough that I could count my ribs at a glance. My wings were covered with healthy and clean feathers. Even my mane was better; it looked like it had been washed and grown out.

“Whoa,” I said.

“Yeah, I know what you mean,” she laughed, patting me on the back. “This is what I looked like back when I was alive.”

Turning to look at her, I saw she had shifted forms. She now had the head of a futabasaurus (though not its neck) on the hunched body of a smilodon, while her right arm appeared to be that of a velociraptor and her left arm was that of a cow. Her legs were from a mastodon, and her tail was that of a spiked stegosaurus. I saw that she also had wings, one of an ostrich and the other a pterodactyl.

“That’s pretty interesting,” I said with a smile on my face before I realized that I knew what her body parts were even though I’d never seen or heard of these reptiles or animals before when I was alive. “Wait, how do I-”

“Know all of my parts?” she asked me before tapping my head with a claw. “That’s Lady Helheim for you; she wouldn’t want one of her Reapers to be uneducated so she placed all kinds of basic and background knowledge in your noggin. Though it would be a good idea to learn how to do it yourself in case you’re ever cut off from our Lady for some reason; don’t worry, I’ll show you how to turn off the smarts later on and help you out.”

When I had been conventionally alive, I knew that while it would have been nice to know my letters proper, I could have never done it. Now, however, I was realizing certain advantages to my new state of being, and having the opportunity to actually learn how to read and write, along with whatever Helheim put in my head, was definitely one of them.

“Thank you very much, Causality,” I told her, tilting my head. “And I have to say that your kind is very interesting; I wish I had had the chance to meet more draconequus.”

“Thanks Fall, but there’s not much of my kind left,” she said as she changed back to her hooded cloak and bones appearance, although her smile was still clear on her face. She squeezed my shoulder, turning me to the mirror again. “Also, the plural for my species is draconequui.”

I nodded. “Right.”

“And now that you know that, this is what you look like now.”

Before I realized what had happened, I saw that I was wearing the same black cloak as she was and I was looking through my empty skull. Instead of being scared out of my mind, I was strangely okay with all of this. I pushed back my hood and ran a bony hoof over my skull and horn and it felt completely normal to me. I was about to push the cloak off of me but something stopped me and told me it wasn't good idea.

You don't need to do that, Causality. Seeing my bare bones won’t cause you to puke.

“You doing good there, kid?” she asked me, concern on her skull.

“Yes, I am,” I said before turning to look at her. “Did you do this so I wouldn’t be freaked out?”

“Of course,” she said, pride in her voice. “No point in springing the whole deal at once if you were not ready for it.”

“Speaking of,” I said, looking at my scythe. “How does this work exactly?”

“Like you, it is an extension of Helheim’s will so she, and we, can do our Role. With a lot of time and practice, you will not really need it to send your assigned lot to the Judge but for the moment, it will act as your crutch.” My eyes went wide as I remembered I was the Reaper of Ponies and I didn’t even know the first thing about the whole alicorn kingdom, let alone anything of the other pony kingdoms. “And before you ask, you don’t need to worry about the pegasus, unicorn or any other kingdoms or outlying villages or what have you; I will take care of them while I help you learn how to do your job by practicing with the alicorns.”

“Alright,” I replied, feeling at ease. “As you are my instructor, what will you be teaching me first?”

“A number of basic things; how to split yourself up, how to change your appearance so you can blend in better in the mortal realm, basic magic, and other odds and ends.”

After that, she began to train me in the basics of everything. I’m not sure how much time passed or if any did pass but by the time she said we were done, I knew a lot more than what I had started with. Some things were a bit difficult for me at the start, like changing my appearance, splitting myself up and a few more things that are a bit more suited to draconequui than ponies.

Still, Causality told me that there was no better way of getting used to my job than to go out into the field. So that’s what we did, leaving Tartarus for the first time since I’d died.

We appeared in an old manor, both of us intangible and invisible. I looked at Causality for guidance but she simply shrugged her shoulders and waved me along. Rolling my nonexistent eyes at her, I moved along the rooms. I knew someone was due to die today but I wasn’t advanced enough in my training to really tell who it was by my Power alone yet.

I floated up through the ceilings until I saw a stallion dead on his side and thought I’d found my appointment.

“Hello,” I said, fumbling with the scroll that held the name of the pony I had to bring to the Judge. “I-”

“Who are you,” the pony asked me, causing me to stumble in surprise.

“I am Fall Harvest,” I said, trying to get everything under control but failing to do that. “I am Death- I mean, I am your Reaper. Wait, not your Reaper; I mean I am a Reaper-” I couldn’t even close my eyes or take panicked breaths of air. “I’m so sorry; this is my first day…” I looked at the list that gave me the name. “Mister Clean...”

“That… that’s not my name, sir,” the stallion said. “That’s my maid’s. My name is Dirty Money.”

“Oh geez,” Causality said floating up from the floor, holding out her arms to both of us. “We’re so sorry about this; like he said this is his first day. I’m supposed to watch over him and he kinda fumbled a bit but I had no idea that you’d be a near us experiencer.”

“It’s… it’s quite all right, I am getting on in years, and with the health problems I’m having, I’m not surprised if I’m higher on your list,” the stallion said as he tried to calm his racing heart. “Though I will miss my maid after all her years of loyal service… just how did she die? I… I want to tell her family it was peaceful, or at least that she didn’t suffer.”

“She died in service for you,” I said, looking past him and to the soul lurking the hallway I was able to see and read now. “She saw that you’d collapsed and raced to get you aid. She had unfortunately slipped on the top stair and broke her neck falling down.”

“Terribly sorry, sir,” said a mare that I had just seen trot into the room, “It was very clumsy of me to trip like that while trying to get help. Won’t happen again, I assure you!”

“Clean Duster, my dear, I do not think it will be an issue considering that you have passed along,” Dirty Money said. “As I said, you served me and my family well for these many years and I will ensure that your family, the Dusters, will be well rewarded.”

“Thank you sir,” she smiled brightly at her former master before turning to face me. “I am ready to go sir,” she said with a bow, the soft yellow coated alicorn mare flashing a smile at me.

“Very okay,” I said, wincing as I fumbled my words again. Holding out my scythe, I raised the blade to her with her backing up. “When I… um, slice through you, you will appear in in a very long line. You will need to wait your turn to face the Judge to see where you will need up for your afterlife.”

”You mean there’s a chance I could be in Tartarus forever?” the mare wilted, taking steps backwards with me noticing with morbid fascination that she was quickly approaching the top of the stairs.

“I cannot believe that you, of all ponies, would be sent to Tartarus,” Dirty said as he walked past me, placing a hoof on her shoulder and stopping her from moving any closer to the stairs. “I am certain that a mare that would risk her own life to save another’s would be bound for Elysium.”

“Th-thank you sir,” she said, tears in her eyes before she turned to face me again. “I’m ready to go sir,” she said to me. With that, I raised my scythe and sent her off to be Judged. I felt the soul pass through the realms and a smile formed on my face. I then blinked, or did the skull equivalent of one, and turned to face Dirty Money.

“Um,” I said, trying to recall exactly what Causality said to do in these situations as Lady Helheim wasn’t -

Still is not.

-all that keen on being publicly known.

“Don’t worry sir,” Causality said softly, placing a hoof on his shoulder. “You will not remember most of this; just small fragments and such.”

“That doesn’t seem-” But before he could finish, his soul flashed back into his body and he woke up. Tilting his head and rubbing the bruise, he began to call out for Clean Duster. We left the house through the roof as he left the room and made the discovery.

“Well Fall, that was not the best of starts,” Causality said as we floated past the manor. “More than a few big mistakes but you’re lucky that he was a near death experiencer and not someone that cheated Lady Helheim. That means he won’t remember most of what you said; maybe one line or two.” I must have looked depressed because she punched my shoulder. “But you did about the same as me, Nidhogg, George and every one of us when we started.”

“Really?” I asked her, turning my head to look at her.

“Oh yeah, I completely bungled my first run; I let the guy talk me into letting him wager for an extension of his lifespan. Said it would be fun. And honestly, what harm could a few extra centuries do for a creature that normally measures its life in eons?” She let out a weak chuckle. “Turns out he was very good at senet and he actually won. Lady Helheim was pissed and I’m not sure why she didn’t just boot me off to the Judge beyond the fact that there were so few draconequui who were suitable for this job; I think literally one out of every googolplex could have the potential to fill the position and there aren’t even close to that many draconequui left.”

“And how many is that in numbers I actually understand?” I asked, my implanted knowledge falling short.

Causality considered. “Well, a googol is the number one followed by a hundred zeroes; a googolplex is one followed by a googol zeros.”

I blinked, the number falling into place within my head. “Wow. That’s a big number.”

“Tell me about it,” Causality agreed. “But you see what I mean, right?”

“Of course,” I told her. “It means there’s almost no chance of ever finding another draconequus who could be a suitable replacement if something ever happened to you.”

“Bingo, new guy,” she said and then she seemed to get sad. “That means I’m stuck with this job for a very long time. There are a few decent members of my kind out there, don’t get me wrong, just none ever suitable for being a Reaper. So I either got to wait until one pops up or they all kick the bucket before I head off to my paradise.”

We stopped on a cloud, looking at her for what seemed a long time before I asked her. “What do you think yours would be like?”

“Like the world I grew up in; much bigger trees and ferns and stuff instead of these toothpicks trees we get now. Proper high temperatures rather than all this cool weather we’re stuck with now,” she grumbled with me tilting my head as it was just the start of harvest season, with it being a crucial time to get the products in as we were dealing with a heat spell. She noticed the confusion on my face and gave me a wry grin. “Kid, and I say this in all seriousness, I am literally old enough to have seen the first snow this planet ever got.”

My jaws dropped as I tried to figure out how that was possible.

“Draconequui age differently, remember?” she said with a chuckle at the expression on my face. “I may seem ancient to you, but to my kind, someone who’s a million years old isn’t even the equivalent of a teenager yet. That kind of lifespan means it’s not easy relating to non-draconequui, but I managed, even before I got this position.”

“Will it start to make sense with time?” I asked her, tilting my head upwards at her.

"Yeah, it will," she said sadly. She then bumped my side and grinned at me. “But hopefully, you'll get your replacement soon before it gets too long for you.”

“Heh,” I said, looking up at her. “You think I can handle the next one, Causality?”

“Yeah, and we’ll keep at it if you goof up again,” she said, pushing my hood over my face with a laugh before dashing off, with me chasing after her while I was laughing all the entire time.




“Wow,” Twilight said as I paused for a moment to gather my thoughts. “That’s… that’s really some story.”

Helheim nodded from her own position. “And that’s just the beginning.” She turned to Fall Harvest, who winced. “Do go on, Fall.”

“All right, all right…” Fall looked contemplative. “So… next comes the part you really care about; where I meet Celestia for the first time.”
Death is forced to take a vacation: Chapter Seven

There are many Reapers, those who monitor the souls of the living and guide them into the realms of the Dead. Now, one is being forced to take a break from his duties. Sent into the land of Equestria until further notice, he meets with one of his charges.

This is the story of Fall Harvest, the Death of Alicorns… and the past he will reveal to Princess Twilight Sparkle.


Chapter Six | Chapter Eight



A story brought to you by :iconanonemousejr: and myself, part of the Harvest-Verse of the Powers That Be Multiverse.


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Evilhumour-Author
Evil actions since whenever
Artist | Hobbyist | Digital Art
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Believe it or not, but my wolf body is not the real me. This is who I am and this is the form is where I have all my power.

And aren't I cute?

Done by an old friend, :iconkirmon64:

And a little quote

Fear those who revel in their sanity. For they are the ones that truly insane. Fear them more then anything if they know the truth, for their minds are far too gone to tell if to they are sane or insane.

My other self is a wolf with wings with a quadra-hinged mouth. So rawr!

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Hollaaaa on this crazy years which has been really hard.
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Hey thank you very much for the fav and watch!
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no problem
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Would you be willing to take a fic request?
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Sorry, I've got a lot on my plate.
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It's fine.
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Spacebattles Evilhumor has a DA and FA page? Well whaddya know.
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yup
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Ah, it's been a while. Thanks for faving my insanely old art piece that hasn't aged well!
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