ErinPtah's avatar

Tattered At The Seams

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By ErinPtah   |   
Seamus Noblet and family, including Geoffrey and Chuck, George, and Clair.

This was early art for the story Why Should I Care? You can see in it which plot points have been there since the beginning (like Geoffrey's blindness), and which changed along the way (like the fact that Seamus has been caught in a wedding dress without shaving properly).
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anonymous's avatar
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thngwhtsqks's avatar
:-/ So, I do not have a paid account and cannot give you an official critique, but here is my offering of thought out feedback at least:

The first two things I notice about this picture are the background and the composition. The background I love because it is a subtle texture that looks like a brocade, but not with overwhelming detail that draws the eye away from the center of the picture. The creamy color is the perfect match to the cool earthtones used for the characters.

The composition is a classic movie poster style, which fits the theme you have of making movie posters/trailers for your stories. For the most part it is balanced with Seamus rightly the center of attention and his parents getting equal weight on either side of him. I am a little surprised by the lack of weight George carries in this picture. Perhaps it is his zen nature that keeps him from hogging the spotlight ^_^ I think Seamus' veil (which is a lovely effect in itself) partially covering George is what adds to the feeling that he is part of the background. (One more note on the background - while the top corner folds look gorgeous, the small dark fold in the bottom left corner is a bit distracting as background).

Details, my favorite partt! George's glove is dashing, but in combination with the rose I keep thinking he is Tux Jansen, er, Tuxedo Mask. His expression of playful joy is perfect! At first I was going to say that George's sweet round face made him look to young, until I remembered that Seamus is older than him; in which case, he looks perfect. I love the way Chuck is angry/fearful and protective of Geoffrey all at the same time. I think Chuck looks a little too much like Stephen, only because I think Chuck's hair is usually a little messier, or at least fluffier than Stephen's since he is a high school teacher not a television personality. Seamus is utter perfection in every way. I love the detail of the lace at the end of his glove/sleeves (did Charlene wear those?) and his necklace and tiara/veil are just fancy enough. Most of all, I love how masculine his body is, the shoulders broad and arm muscles defined. The way his hand rests on his face, he looks bemused, subtly defiant, content, not at all affected by the bookend glares.

Overall I would give 5s for Vision, Technique and Impact, only a 4 for Originality, but I think that is because I am so familiar with your style, but that doesn't decrease my love for it!

((I hope that was helpful and not annoying X/))
ErinPtah's avatar
Ahhhh, this is awesome!

The original idea was just to do Seamus and his parents, but then I realized it needed someone between Chuck and Seamus for design's sake, so I went with George. Thus his background-ness. (Now I wish I had put Jerri in it somewhere. A proper movie poster for the story wouldn't be complete without her.)

I often worry that I'm drawing Seamus too young-looking. George, on the other hand, has a smooth round face deliberately - he gets it from his Korean bio-dad - and people always think he's younger than he is. (It gets to be a serious point of irritation when he's trying to get started professionally and colleagues still treat him like an intern . . . but that's another story.)

Making the distinction between Chuck and Stephen ought to be an art form. Oddly enough, my mental image is that Chuck's hair is usually flatter - Stephen, with the professional stylists, gets more volume in his. Clearly this is a sign I should go back and watch the shows more =P

It sounds like you've seen exactly the things I want to show in Seamus. "Bemused, subtly defiant, content" is just what I was going for.

I redesigned the dress between here and the finale, and the lace detail on the gloves didn't fit with the new image. Which is a shame, because I loved drawing it.

Gloves from Charlene probably wouldn't have fit Seamus. Those masculine muscles, y'know =)

Far from being annoying, this was a fantastic comment to come home to. I may have to request critiques on everything I do now :D
thngwhtsqks's avatar
^________^ yay, I'm glad this was helpful/pleasant/something. JERRI would be awesome...have you drawn Jerri yet? Right after I wrote this critique I looked at a picture of Chuck, and you're right, his hair is much more lank rather than coiffed like Stephen's. Auggh, Seamus is PERFECT (and so HOT), and so, I realized later, is George ^_^ I love the way he looks exactly like his baby pictures! (see, this is the fangirl OMG SQUEE comment now) Hee, I may have to get a paid account, so my critiques count for something :-p
ErinPtah's avatar
I've drawn Jerri once - [link] - I'm told she's too pretty, but eh, it was my first try =)

It has been crazy-fun drawing George at different ages. I have plenty of OCs, but this is the first one where I started at birth and worked my way up from there.
Hetalia8P's avatar
I'm slightly afraid of Chuck in this picture. I think he's snarling at me.

George looks adorable!
aslann1211's avatar
aslann1211Student Digital Artist
Your drawings for your fanfiction are always great. This, of course, is perfect. I'm a big fan of your stories and I'm reading a big amount of your LiveJournal.

Right now, I'm in the middle of reading "Expected". After I finish that story, I'll continue onto "Why Should I Care?".
ErinPtah's avatar
Oh, awesome. Thanks~!
anonymous's avatar
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