Published: October 21, 2002
"On That Black and White Mixture Color-Thing"
[Ugh.] I cannot tell you how much I dislike the color grey. No, I lied; I can. For starters, it's not even a color. It's a mix of two other non-colors, black and white. I mean, I can tolerate black or white because they're special (plus they're "opposites", so they are essential to the world of light and darkness.) But...grey... is the most "blah" of all the colors. It makes no visual stimulation; a person doesn't walk up to a grey wall and say, "Oh my! This wall is strikingly grey! I just cannot believe how grey this wall is! Oh, the impact on my eyes! Grey!" You see my point. Grey can also be used as a euphamism for being neither high nor low ("grey area"). I don't know about you, but I'd rather be one of the extremes and know exactly where I can head instead of being labeled "grey" and perpetually vacillating between my choices. I'm already wishy-washy as it is! Don't get me wrong; there are plenty grey things that I love, like my [soon to be] car keys or most greyscale photographs. Even still, nothing brings more life to a picture or an object than a splash, even a hint, of true color. Grey is the ultimate teen movie--it tries to be cool but it's really just a boring plot underneath. Grey is Brown's poser, trying to represent multiple colors by gradation, yet simply doesn't make it. Grey is a would-be blob, an annoyingly tangled computer cable, the most boring sanitarium you've laid eyes on (even though those are supposed to be white, right?) Grey is an abomination to the senses.
Yet, I can feel a wee little bit of respect for grey. It has to represent all the different shades of right and wrong. It gives a bit of solace to the colorblind--hey, at least they can see! Most of all, grey has to put up with all the crap I just threw at it a moment ago.
So, I guess grey isn't so bad. It's definately no sore loser!