ebflover777's avatar
I tried and tried again
49 Watchers5.6K Page Views153 Deviations
  • June 6
  • United States
  • Deviant for 6 years
Badges
Super Albino: Llamas are awesome! (133)
My Bio
Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.

Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.

I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.

Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."

This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.

There can be only one

Favourite Visual Artist
Matt Roszak/たまにゃん
Favourite TV Shows
Craig of the Creek/Summer Camp Island
Favourite Bands / Musical Artists
Machigerita/Utsu-P/Masa/Hideki Naganuma
Favourite Books
If webcomics count, 8-Bit Theater
Favourite Games
Jet Set Radio Future/The Sims 4
Favourite Gaming Platform
Xbox original
Tools of the Trade
Medibang Paint(Android)

Comments 92

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not into scams
DarkMattachuHobbyist Writer
Thanks for the fave :)

Thanks for those delicious faves! If you like what you see, why not watch? It don't cost a thing!

Thanks for watching!

ShadowKitty99Hobbyist Artist
Hello my friend it's me EtoChan13  and my main account is unbanned now so go and watch me here on my main account ShadowKitty99 
I'll follow, thank you!