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My new album is out.  Thanks to the IDMF label for helping me reach a larger audience.  Someone asked me what the album title means.  It is basically a reminder that as long as you keep growing, there is nothing to be truly disturbed about.  Growth is really the central job of any organism.  Most of the other things we get upset about are just preferences.

Anyway, the album is potentially free or you can pay any amount you want.  This money will help fund the IDMF label which is nonprofit.  If you'd like to support me specifically, consider buying a painting.

There is also a music video for one of the songs here:…
  • Listening to: Atoms for Peace - Amok
It has been a long time since i painted or made digital art, so i just stopped using this place.  I got some new supplies and made a painting today so i am back!  While i was gone i released an album or maybe two, you can find them at
  • Listening to: Alva Noto - Uni Pro "Univrs"
  • Reading: Finding Flow…
  • Reading: Boundaries of the Soul by June Singer…

Here is my new album. Enjoy
  • Listening to: Flunk - Karma Police
  • Reading: Games People Play by Eric Berne
  • Drinking: your soul
It is school time again.  So far it is enjoyable except that ive had headaches often.  The art class came with $130 worth of cool supplies.  Looking forward to using oil pastels in class and learning more about how to be smooth with them.  I really should be sleeping so i am going to lay in darkness now.
  • Listening to: Neurosis - Times of Grace
  • Reading: your mind
  • Playing: pandemic 2
well, i went and injured a nerve in my right arm. long story short, physical therapy is helping but it just doesnt feel right to paint anymore.  so i bought a 9x6 in notebook and i resolved to fill it with crayon, oil pastel, and whatever else arts.  its been a lot of fun so far and using crayons has been a great way to find my way back to the mindset of a child. it also helps that sometimes i am drawing with my younger bro dylan who is great. he likes to crash toy cars a lot its fun.
  • Listening to: Zu - Chthonian "Carboniferous"
  • Reading: Kali Kaula-A Manual of Tantric Magick by jan fries
  • Playing: pandemic 2
Hey this is great, i can talk about myself.  I made a new 2 disc album for example.…

Ive done a lot of painting lately despite an arm injury.  I cant play guitar so i took up chess again.  Have any of you noticed the constant blizzard of art here starts to sort of numb you, making it difficult to notice and appreciate subtle pieces?  That feeling is bugging me...i have over 900 deviations in my mailbox i havent looked at.  The thought of going through them almost feels like a chore, and that is not ok with me.  Is the same thing happening irl, a mind numbing explosion of media?
  • Listening to: Meshuggah - Closed Eye Visuals
  • Reading: Logical Chess: Move By Move - Irving Chernev
  • Drinking: tea
If there is a painting you are interested in buying, simply send me a note here (or email and we can discuss details.  Here is an easy link to my paintings (most of the older ones have been given away or painted over).…
  • Listening to: Baxter - Oh My Love
  • Reading: Jung on Active Imagination…

I really love this painting, this was the one that felt like i had finally found my style or voice or something.  Also its just nice to have on my wall.  On the other hand id kind of like to start selling my paintings both online and in my hometown.  i forget the exact dimensions but its something like 30x40 or maybe a bit larger.  Acrylics and texture paste, ready to hang.

The real problem is deciding on a price.  My first piece sold to my landlord who took $50 off my rent that month haha.  My second piece was sold for $100, altho i suspect the buyer was unhappy with the frame.  I checked google shopping for prices of abstract expressionist paintings and they range $100 to $1300, but the average is probably $250.
  • Listening to: Pallaschtom by Ruins
  • Reading: Jung on Active Imagination…

Here is the new album w00p.
  • Listening to: Sleep - Jerusalem (pt. 2) "Jerusalem"
  • Reading: postmodern social theory by george ritzer…

My newest album is finished and whatnot.  It is full of sound waves and sound particles.  Drink deeply.

It is always so fulfilling to finish up all the little detail work involved in an album.  I still havent slept just from pure creative energy lol.  I wont fill this box with too many thoughts but deviants might be interested in the fact that much of this album is inspired by color field painting.  Some of the tracks are named with my favorite color combinations.

  • Listening to: kris cadwell - a minor thing
  • Reading: Modern Sociological Theory

My friend chris made a video and used some of my music in it.  I really like the sunrise.
  • Listening to: mick harris
Tonight i feel like a lot of optimistic choices i have made recently are starting to take root in my thoughts and perceptions.  I feel like i am learning a lot about emotions that was very mysterious to me for many years, and while normally i would be quite impatient about getting on with my plans (which have been delayed about a month), i now feel more accepting of the long term efforts that will be unavoidable in these projects.  I find myself more focused on the fact that i managed to initiate these plans at all and have cut myself enough slack to actually feel proud of myself for once.

I think soon it will be time to express this optimism with art in some way, which seems out of character for me...but then again, looking back on my color field paintings, they are quite bright, expressive, perhaps trusting of the audience.  They definitely felt like accomplishments, and as a bonus other people seemed to have personal experiences from viewing them that were far different from mine (which was my hope/intent).

I've also recently started making songs again; having a creative block in music is one of the most emotionally draining experiences for me, so this has been a huge relief.  I think i will post a link to one or two for you all...i can never wait till an album is finished rofl.

As a final note to myself: this post is a reminder for you in less optimistic times.  You want to chase this mindset, it is not just false hope or irrational is intelligent strategy; also it makes you and the people around you happier.

ok, here are a few new songs (they might not be completely finished)……

*These songs are Creative Commons: Free to download and share if no profit is made, and free to remix/manipulate as long as you share with the same Creative Commons stipulations.  Also id love to hear what you do with them.


main website -
  • Listening to: Thom Yorke - And It Rained All Night
  • Reading: Habermas and the Foundations... by Rick Roderick
  • Drinking: waterz
I wanted to lay out some of my ideas about what my current style of painting means to me.  Much of this will probably be familiar to anyone that has read into color field painting; clearly im not the first person to become attracted to any of these ideas.

First an actual physical description of what ive been doing is in order.  What it comes down to is a process of thinly layering colors with only one paint brush.  This is done without any regard for shapes, forms, designs, or organization in general (much like my life lol).

I imagine some people will instantly think to themselves; what the hell is the point then?  The simplest answer is that color is the point; yet the longer i work this way, the more layers of meaning i find in the process/outcome, which is what i want to post about.

Of course there is nothing new about having emotional responses to color be the focus of art; this is part of what can safely be called an artistic tradition by now. What is more important to me however is the complete freedom to interpret/respond that is given to the viewer; the result of the very lack of form that many people criticize.  Freedom, of course, has a very long philosophical/sociological tradition behind it that is still very pertinent to the historical era we find ourselves in.  I am reminded of a quotation by Adorno;

"No universal history leads from savagery to humanitarianism, but there is one from the slingshot to the megaton bomb..."

Another aspect i would like to discuss is the use of a single brush size and only singular brush strokes (in only one direction).  While the brush stroke can be seen as finite, isolated, or almost atomic in structure, the result of large numbers of them is a formless sort of fog without any clearly defined objects or boundaries.  This parallels various models of the structure of matter as well as (more interestingly for me) the dissonance between our perception of ourselves as individuals while simultaneously being part of an ill-defined social fog.  

Of course, these are just my own interpretations which i do not want to force on anybody; i guess i just felt like explaining why i find this to be worth the time/effort that i have been investing in it.  Im always interested in hearing other people's interpretations, as i tend to see society/history as the battlefield where interpretations fight for dominance.  It is important to me that people are encouraged to believe in their individual interpretations.

Anyway, also i thought id mention that if anyone wants such a painting for their office or whatever, ill gladly take their favorite color and use contrast/ect to make it the focus of a piece for them.  Just send me a note/email/whatever.
  • Listening to: Deftones - Fireal
  • Reading: The Age of Turbulance - Alan Greenspan

I finished a new album and here it is.  I hope it is enjoyed by humans and nonhumans alike.
  • Drinking: tea
chellart> ive had bewm and bob dole
chellart> leave the word creating to the profesionals
parental|unit> they live on...
parental|unit> in my mind
chellart> haha
chellart> you dont even remember them
chellart> only bob dole knows
chellart> its so wonderous
chellart> and imporious
parental|unit> bob dole doesn't even mean anything
parental|unit> lol
chellart> :(((((((((((
parental|unit> :S
parental|unit> define bob dole
* Quits: chellart (chella@rock.roll.stumble.fall) ([] Local kill by chellart (death by bob dole betrayal))
* Joins: chella (chella@rock.roll.stumble.fall)
chella> i should ahve stayed gone forever
chella> but bob dole said dont keep hate in your heart
parental|unit> lol
  • Listening to: Deftones - Fireal
Hello.  Some of you might have noticed i vanished for about a week there and i wanted to make a journal entry now that i am back.  I was in the hospital for about 5 days with some kidney problems; lupus was suspected, but since i recovered without any medication (just lots of IV fluids) its unlikely that i have anything too serious.  Tests are being run anyway, and doctors keep telling me they won't give up until they know why i got sick haha.  Also, they have proven that i do NOT have epilepsy by monitoring my heart during multiple 'episodes/siezures/whatever'.

Anyway, im glad to be back, it was fun checking the 40 or 50 deviations that were waiting for me.  In other news, i have just about got a new cd organized, altho i plan to delay releasing it while i organize some related artwork and website content.

pz and mantises,
  • Listening to: datach'i - form
  • Reading: Magical Thinking by Augusten Burroughs
  • Playing: Spore Creatures for nintendo ds
  • Drinking: lots of spring water
Update: i am back online.  While without internet i picked up on my painting and i should have a few to upload before long.  To everybody who reads this: keep rocking you are cool.
  • Listening to: Deftones - Root
Yes, i have been disconnected for late payment.  I should be back online in about a week, i hope you all can survive without me for seven whole days!  On the bright side, the lack of distractions has got me practicing violin again.  In other news, i woke up before dawn and went for a walk, during which i found and stole a bike (which i do not recommend or condone).  I keep having these dreams that take place in trains or trainyards and riding a bike around reminded me of riding bikes as a kid, which reminded me that i used to dream about trains as a kid too.  Dreams are really weird and i think l-theanine is helping me recall them more readily.  Ok rambling over, feel good humans.

  • Listening to: the sound of traffic in the distance
  • Eating: salty chips
  • Drinking: cold water