Earn Your Wings

The moment she slips through the window, you feel your heart stop. You can almost hear the thundering of her heart in the silence, but slowed, like the world had ceased to spin – time impossibly halted. You freeze, the confessional note dropping from your hand and hitting the floor without a sound. Your hand still holds the shape of the envelope that conceals your feelings, the emotions you were about to admit. You had promised her. You had said that you would go away together, always together, never leave each other.

Surely this isn't happening? You inhale shakily as you start forward, panicked, though seemingly in slow motion as the wind whips at her dress in the night air. Her ribbon looses from her hair, fluttering back through the open window. Her eyes, wide open, gaze back at you, a smile curling onto her pale lips. You watch, your mouth agape as her body slips over the edge, hidden from view. Dignified even in suicide, she bows her head as she disappears.

You gulp down air, shaking, your hand curled ahead as though to grasp the air. You shuffle forwards, your eyes wide. You stare back at the door, back at her brother's empty beds, as though to find someone to ask why. You had come to take her. This isn't right. This isn't what was supposed to happen. You let out a soft cry of confusion, sadness – she had to be okay, right? She was always alright, she never let anything hurt her that badly. She had to be joking. The fall, the jump – she staged it. She must have, right?

You suddenly scream, beyond the point of silence, your eyes wide – not a scream of anguish, or terror, fear, or sadness, just pure unadulterated shock. "No!" You cry, shouting at the top of your lungs, rushing forwards, towards the balcony window, flinching minutely before you dare to look over. You struggle to gather your breath, glancing back once again for a clue as to you. "B-But---" You try to articulate your emotions, your voice barely a whisper.

"She can't be... Why would--- Oh god..." You mutter, biting your lip hard and finally taking the plunge, and looking over the edge. You gasp in horror. Your pallour pales, the whites of your eyes visible ridiculously as you stare at the broken body that was once your perfect angel. You shake your head, the already messy hair sticking to your forehead as it drips in a cold, panicked sweat. No.

She... She is... So lifeless... Was this your fault? Had you done this? You cling to the balcony bars, simply staring, the horror written across your face – mouth still gaping, you breath ceased. Your knuckles turn white from gripping the cool metal. You had been with her just hours ago, she had been okay. You had planned an escape from this place, an escape from this world.

Maybe she had taken it more literally than you had. She had always said how much she wanted to live with him. Peter was the Prince of her dreams; and Never Never Land, the kingdom. All she wanted was to learn how to fly.

But you have to earn your wings.