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kylakittycat (Devil)
Tuner-Creations (Basso)
OMG I just read all the comments and im crying Waaaah! 
PEOPLE you absolutely ROCK! Love Love Love 
you warm my heart up
inspired me to live!!!
i wasn't expecting so many comments!!!
i thought no one cares... No, I disagree! 
well, haha, my dad is still an asshole but u know what?
I dont give a shit anymore :happybounce: 
_______
 
so many people told me their stories (noted me and commented)
im happy (well their stories arent funny) that you understood me!!! Huggle! Hug 
i was waiting for comments like that :

 OMG STOP YOU ARE AN ATTENTION WHORE  Roll Eyes 
 OMG SHUT UP PLEASE IT'S NOT A BIG PROBLEM! OMG MOAR POEMS! 

and etc... 
but you're absolutely amazing people!!! Floating 
bless you~ Tight Hug Man Hug Flirtatious  
I dont think someone will pay attention to this 
but at least i will say everything i feel 
or felt
idk


So it was tuesday when i felt this bullshit inside me 
everything pisses me off 
everything fucking annoys me!

it was evening so i was smoking and watchng people coming home when some homeless asked for a cigarette
i said it was my last one so i dont have anymore
he went away 

when i came home and saw my gf playing some shit game i decided to drink some water

but water in bottle was spoiled so accidently i puked 
i didnt know i can puke that much and then i felt weakness in my body 

Olya got me new water but i was so weak i wasnt even able to move 

i started crying because everyday my body hurts
every fucking day my mind goes insane
i cant live anymore
i dont feel myself free 
you cant say "boi stop smoking and you'll feel better"
NO FUCKING NO

my father, agaaaain, forgot about me 
he knows i have problems with health BUT HE DOESNT GIVE A FUCK

and he makes me cry every week so i dont answer the phone thanks god we live separately

my mom pays tooo much attention to my life she controls eveything 
im crying even now i want to be free 
im not fucking kid im 19 y.o. WOMAN!

enough... thanks for reading dis...
have a good day/eveninig/night
i wont be home at least for next two days
im afraid i have bad news about my health especially lungs... 
sorry guys...
im losing my mind
hello

i know you have to wait but please understand me
i am in hospital now 
and i will upload all my parts 10.3.2018

please wait a lil bit
i will finish it 

i have got some problems with my health now 
sorry :heart:
SOOOO ALL YOU NEED TO DRAW FOR ME (PLZ NO BASES OR GAME CREATORS) ARE Julia X Olya

AND I CAN DRAW FOR YOU YOUR ONLY 2 OCS!! :D

LET'S BEGIN :3
  1. :iconfiresnakegaming13:  [F2U] Progress Bar - Rainbow Star (3/4) by StarriiChan
  2. :iconvivsthegreat:  [F2U] Progress Bar - Rainbow Star (1/4) by StarriiChan
  3. :iconcure-edmatt:  [F2U] Progress Bar - Rainbow Star (1/4) by StarriiChan
  4. :iconlali-the-bunny:  [F2U] Progress Bar - Rainbow Star (0/4) by StarriiChan
  5. :iconsansxfrisk4:  [F2U] Progress Bar - Rainbow Star (0/4) by StarriiChan

ITS MY 18 BIRTHDay

Journal Entry: Thu Jul 13, 2017, 9:14 AM



Happy b-day to me
i wish myself stay alive and be happy as long ....no , be happy always!!!!!
I luv u guys!

Stolen tag

Journal Entry: Wed Jul 12, 2017, 8:02 AM



 Here are the rules of the tag:
1) Pick one of your OCs
2) Answer the questions as if you were your OCs
3) Tag other people!


I have picked my OC July

What is your name?

July


Do you know why you were named that?

My creator Julia was born in july so i think that's why



Single or taken?

Single and proud



Have any abilities or powers?

nah



____



What is your eye color?

depends on my mood, sometimes brown, sometimes green


What about hair color?

Brown


Have any family members?

Julia Horst, Klara Nia and me :heart:


Oh? How about pets?

No no no


Ok, now tell us something you don't like

Hmmm... I dont like being ignored and also dont like to be alone *sighs*

What are your hobbies?

MUSICMUSICMUSIC


Have you ever hurt anyone?

My ex


Ever... killed anyone before?

No i am okay with that


What animal are you?

I am cougar


What are your worst habits?

Chewing my own tongue


Do you look up to anyone?

Imma independent


Do you go to school?

High school


Do you ever want to marry or have kids someday?

I am a child-free



Do you have fangirls/fanboys?

No

What are you most afraid of?

I am afraid to be forgotten , to be left alone forever



 

What do you mostly wear?

      black skirt and white t-shirt and sometimes if i want to stockings


What is one food that tempts you?
I prefer to drink more than to spend my time eating food



Am I annoying you?

?


Well, it's still not over!

I kinda dont give a shit


What class are you in? (lower, middle, high)

High school as i said

How many friends do you have?

*cries*


What are your thoughts on pie?

AWFUL


Favorite drink?

TEATEATEATEA



What's your favorite place?

My bed


Are you interested in anyone?  

NAH


Would you rather swim in the lake or the ocean?

In pacific ocean ...i wanna swim right there....


Are you Seme or Uke?

*raises her eyebrow* Excuse me?


There are not all questions but who cares lmao



Stolen TAG ( I AM SO SORRY, JULIE :c)

Journal Entry: Tue Jul 11, 2017, 1:27 PM



 I am so sorry :iconsmol-panda: for stealing it... I am so sorry
Let's start (Oh gosh my first ever tag *cries*)

Anorexia
[x] You hate your body.
[x] You have starved yourself. 
[x] You have low self esteem.
[ ] You use laxatives.
[x] You need to be skinnier.
[ ] People always say you're skinny, but you think you're fat.
[ ] People think you are way too skinny. 
[x] You skip at least one meal a day.
[ ] You limit your calories or check them constantly by compulsion.
Total: 5

ADHD
[ ] You are hyper most of the time.
[ ] You barely pay attention to anything.
[x] You cannot cooperate with people well.
[ ] You seem to never sit still.
[ ] You talk all the time.
[x] You need attention 24/7.
[x] You aren't very shy
Total: 3

Bipolar Disorder
[x] You can act wild at times then the next you are severely depressed.
[x] You are very irritable.
[x] You barely get any or no sleep.
[ ] You have very high self esteem at times.
[x] You have used or abused alcohol, drugs or sex.
[x] You have thought of/attempted suicide.
[x] You have the worst mood swings of anyone you know. 
Total: 6

Bulimia Nervosa
[x] You've thrown up all your food at one time. 
[x] You've thrown it up even when you don't feel sick.
[ ] You have little control over how you eat.
[ ] You use laxatives.
[x] You eat fast.
[ ] You have overly exercised to where you almost fainted/passed out. 
[ ] People think you are way too skinny.
Total: 3

Conduct Disorder
[ ] You are a bully. 
[ ] You threaten other people. 
[ ] You often find yourself in fights.
[ ] You have used a weapon that could cause injury to others. 
[ ] You are cruel to humans and/or animals. 
[ ] You have raped/molested someone.
[ ] You destroy property on purpose.
[ ] You always lie. 
[ ] You've stayed out all night.
[x] You have/attempted to run away from home. 
Total: 1

Depression
[x] You are always, or normally, feel sad.
[x] You always, or normally, are crying. 
[ ] You find no hope in your future.
[ ] You find no longer excitement over the activities you used to love.
[ ] You always find yourself around the house or in bed all day.
[ ] You are anti-social. 
[x] You have low self esteem.
[ ] Everything bad that happens is always your fault. 
[ ] Hope is no longer there for you.
Total: 2

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
[x] You have disturbing thoughts or thoughts you hate.
[x] You have to do a certain thing until it feels right.
[ ] You have to keep things in a certain order.
[x] You have harmed yourself.
[ ] You are afraid you will get an STD, or AIDS.
[x] You have to check some stuff over again.
Total: 3

Schizophrenia / Anxiety
[x] You often have hallucinations or sudden memories you can't escape.
[x] You can be confused about reality and fantasy.
[x] You think people are always staring or talking about you. 
[ ] You have difficulty with relationships with family, friends, and opposite/same sex.
[x] You do not take care of your hygiene as much as others say you should.
[x] You are very shy. 
[x] You often talk to yourself
Total: 6

OVERALL TOTAL: 29

0-5: You're very normal.
6-15: You're fine.
16-20: You might be okay.
21-30: You have problems. (*sigh*)
31-35: You have really bad problems. You might need to see a therapist.


icon comms are open (look at mine)

Journal Entry: Sun Jul 9, 2017, 6:26 AM


I will done all rq in these 4 days so i think i can make for you a pixel 50x50 icon
10 points ( edited ) per icon 

guys..my dad is homophobe...

Journal Entry: Sat Jul 8, 2017, 12:21 PM
I cant stop crying cause my dad told me he doesnt want me to be with my Olga... I cant believe that my FATHER IS A FUCKING HOMOPHOBE!!

Deviant art was kinda cool place for me. I found so many friends there 💕 im happy i know you guys ,but my drawing skills suck.. I have become instagram addicted lol .. I wish you inspiration and happiness. Ya all deserved it :) love you

nedosphere 💓
I dont know why my life was such dark and empty 
now i finally found real love and happiness

if you will ever ask me WHY AM I STILL ALIVE
answer : i never lose hope :) 

spread peace love and kindness
Im half atheist and half christianin...
i believe in it but i didn't see this so i am not sure....


what about you guys?