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They should write novels about my lovelife.

Journal Entry: Fri Oct 3, 2008, 6:39 PM
  • Listening to: P!@TD- Northern Downpour
  • Watching: Becoming Jane
  • Playing: FFX for old times sake
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It would be a tale of distance and unreciprocated feelings. Feelings that come at the wrong time, feelings that are married to guilt and feelings that flood your mind and melt away the sadness and the anger that's scarred your heart for so long.
A love triangle, if you will. Not that I ever really understood how those worked until now.
I don't like being in the middle.
I'd happily divulge every detail of my current situation, but the last thing I need is the wrong person to see that.
Why do I have to be so considerate of everyone's feelings? Why can't I just think of myself, do things for myself, and say, "To hell with everyone else?"
I just, can't, and I know I have to, but I can't, and I'm scared and I'm worried and for the first time in two months, I actually cried. Just a tear, but I could feel it in my chest, and it was amazing.
That's how I knew I was feeling again, really feeling, not just pretending to...but as I said before, my story involves feelings that come at the wrong time.
I've come to feel helpless again as well.
My transformation has fallen apart. New Adrianna has been reintroduced to Old Adrianna, and they are trying to just be "Adrianna" a little bit of both sides of me. Trying to make a perfect combination.
I've officially decided to hell with 4C's. It's a community college, and I want something different. I don't want to be home anymore. I want to be in another place. Every time I think to apply for the spring semester the form intimidates the shit out of me. Yeah, that's right, I'm STILL not ready yet. I will take my sweet time. But I don't want to keep putting it off. I WILL go. Won't I?

that's enough for now
:iconoukami666: is doing the 10 features. I'm one of them but I'm doing it different. Most people who read my journals don't have time to dig through ten people's galleries, so I'm just going to go right ahead and feature whoever the hell I want, and they don't have to do it in return.

1. :iconoukami666:
Taangy Wedding by Oukami666
Discussing Politics by Oukami666
Spellcaster by Oukami666

2. :iconittybittysheip:

3. :iconwapy:

4. :icondemiton:

5. :iconbanzatou:
Copic drawing of a Knight by Banzatou
Kagamine Rin and Len by Banzatou

6. :iconburtzman:

7. :iconraqsonu:
IRIS de arcoh by raqsonu
mayephis by raqsonu

8. :iconmlboa:
Outgrow by MLBOA
RainBoA 2007 by MLBOA
ID Peace B by MLBOA

9. :iconpaintinginblack:

10. This spot I'm leaving open...for anyone who wants me to do don't have to do it in return.

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Add a Comment:
raqsonu Featured By Owner Oct 8, 2008  Professional Digital Artist
thanks very much for feature!
I do not know how to thank!
maybe I make you a surprise with a drawing, okay?
DriRose Featured By Owner Oct 8, 2008  Professional Traditional Artist
Aww :hug: I just think your art is inspiring. ^^
raqsonu Featured By Owner Oct 9, 2008  Professional Digital Artist
thanks supreme adri-chan!
Oukami666 Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2008
:hug: Come over my house and take out all your frustration on SCIV characters.
DriRose Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2008  Professional Traditional Artist
Burtzman Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2008
I don't want to see you end up not going to college and regretting it later. Do your research and find a place that meets your needs. I'll see you in a week, and I'm giving you a big hug when I do. I hope you feel better.
wapy Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2008  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:aww: You featured me :love:

Oh, your story sure took my breath away and it's sad for me to know I'm so far away from you I can't do a thing to help you out. E-hugs is all I can give now, along with a pair of eyes.
:hug: :eyes:
DriRose Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2008  Professional Traditional Artist
=) :hug:
wapy Featured By Owner Oct 7, 2008  Hobbyist Digital Artist
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Submitted on
October 3, 2008