A confession to myself

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By drift-Angel
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It has been a long time since I have touched Photoshop, 3Ds Max or even my Camera I even wrote less if even any. I let go of all the things I have grown to love because I hated everything.
I found it hard to be creative I kept pushing but the more I pushed the less I even wanted to look at anything that was artistic and when I try to do some traditional drawing now I freeze, my hand can't draw anymore. I gave it all up for 4 years or more I sat in my house not wanting to work, not wanting to do anything above all of this I have destroyed my career, depression slowly crept on me to the point where I was drowning and no one helped.

I always got the comments that I am lazy, that I am a failure from surrounding families and friends, but they refused to understand what I was going through and often some would tell me they do but in other means I find them talking behind my back.

A year ago I took a step and started working as a playschool teacher (Crappy salary) but it's all I got, in a way I get to be creative in the job, more cutting more artistic views with the kids and even when I felt I have no love to give I apparently had plenty. I will not say I'm 100% happy but I'll say that I'm working on it however it is a definite thing that I am 100% feeling guilty and miserable for all the wrong choices that I have taken. I am 30 years old with no proper career, my Bachelor degree went down the drain...

I want to promise my followers that I would be back again in DeviantArt but even that I am not sure I can keep.

I want to give you an advice as well but I am empty handed with nothing filling my sleeves but the hands I have used to be creative before, so despite how I am feeling right now I will give you one that might help you.

If you are creative, if you love drawing, Photography and crafting even when you're falling don't stop them nowadays they could be something that would surely save your life, a sense of completion and accomplishment when you finish at least one artwork.

I thank you for the time you have taken to read this and it is always nice to see all of you again.

Love Angel
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© 2018 - 2020 drift-Angel
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mwReAnimToR's avatar
dont give up on graphics. youve always been good. it would be nice to see you post some new stuff.