Public Access

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Follows after: Sacrifice (mature content warning)

    The trails.
    They weren't technically part of the barn. They stretched for miles into the hilly forest conservation area surrounding the stable. It was public for everyone's use! He wouldn't be at the barn. Jarin knew very well Sydney said not to ride with Tristan. He didn't say he couldn't ride around Tristan. It was a public area. He couldn't control who was on those trails.
    Jarin had a bad feeling about it. He could feel the tension tugging on his heart. This was bad. This was not okay. He shouldn’t be doing these things to someone he liked. It felt dirty. It felt like the kind of games Sydney would play so…maybe Jarin could too? Equal exchange?
    “Jarin, you know, if there’s anything going on, you can tell me about it.”
    Jarin looked up from his daze to see Tristan. There was lots going on. Where did he even start? Maybe the details weren’t the best shared. It didn’t feel right to talk about a relationship with someone who just ended a once-meaningful one. He kept a downcast look, “Zora said I should just find something that makes me happy and start with that. So long as I didn’t forget what made me happy, then it’d all be okay. I think...that could apply to everyone, maybe. Like maybe even...you?”
    Jarin began immediately backpedaling, feeling a bit foolish for even suggesting it. He laughed nervously, turning a tinge red, “Er, well, I mean, of course, you have a right to be happy! You already knew that! I didn’t mean you couldn’t be happy! You probably already know what makes you happy! You’re way cool like that! You didn’t need any advice-er-well, not really advice just a suggestion but not like I was suggesting you like follow what I said-ah-uhhh-mmm” Oh boy...he could feel himself start to implode on himself.
    Tristan gave a soft chuckle, a slight smile coming to his lips as he glanced down, somewhat amused by Jarin’s total backpedal off of that, but at the same time, it touched him that Jarin would even think about him. He gave a slightly sad smile before glancing up to him. “Thank you, Jarin. Now go groom down Shifty and get him tacked up, we ought to get a move on.”

     “Who's number is this?”
     “Uhm…I don’t know. Must have typed it on accident.”
     “Tell ya what, let's ring it and see, shall we?”

    This was it. The moment he would straight-up defied Sydney. He shouldn’t do this. He shouldn’t do this. Oh god, he shouldn’t do this. Everything inside his body was begging him to turn around and run other than the lone voice of his heart that said Tristan mattered too. He had to return the kindness. His moms would be sorely disappointed if he didn’t take up Tristan’s kind offers.
    Jarin was frozen in place. He was in the barn. It was too late to turn back now. He was there. The best he could do was get out of there as quickly as possible. Jarin performed his fastest groom session and tack up procedure that he had ever dared. He was out of there long before Tristan and was even waiting on him further off from the barn. He made sure to stay in a blind spot from the roundpen just in case.
     “Hey, Jarin, relax your body please.” Tristan told him with a roll of his eyes, “Shifty’s very receptive, you’re making him tense up as well.” He figured that it would maybe chill Jarin out to go for a canter, so he cued Rusi forward. “Come on then,” he said with a smile.
    The second they crossed over in “public land”, Jarin’s whole demeanor changed. He seemed freed up from the fear and worry. It certainly calmed Shifty a ton. He was much more relaxed now, moving out calmly. Jarin gracefully picked up Shifty, working through Dressage maneuvers as they went along the flat, clear parts of the trail. How relaxing and liberating. He was starting to look a lot more like the Dressage rider Tristan knew he could be.
    Along the trail where it got narrow, Jarin was following behind Tristan until he heard a noise from further down the trail. He saw the loudly colored mare, Tango, popping up over a hill and approaching them. Jarin knew that to be one of Sydney’s horses he was training. Jarin’s behavior took a dive suddenly. He looked about dramatically, “I gotta go! Uh, pee!” He dove off of Shifty and plummeted down the steep hill. He could not be seen riding with Tristan! He slid behind a tree and hid.

     “Well, what a fuckin’ coincidence. A number you don’t know and it just so happens to be a Tristan Ennerstone. Well, ain’t that just funny?”
     “I-”
     “Jarin, there’s only one goddamn reason you’d need to even talk to that asshole and that had better have been to tell him you’re not fuckin’ riding with him.”
     “Uh…yea,”

    Sydney spotted Tristan as he approached. He rolled his eyes, noticing another horse tacked up behind him. Jarin. No way he’d have another horse out here if it wasn’t fucking Jarin. That absolute dipshit. Sydney scowled hard at Tristan, showing his disgust for the asshole. “Seems you’ve lost a rider, there, dipshit. Where is he?” It was more of a threat than a question.
    “Rider? I just see a horse there, fucker,” Tristan responded with a bright, innocent smile. “And here I was thinking you were a trainer, can’t figure out the difference between a horse and its rider. Hell.” He let out a low whistle and a shrug. “Well, can’t be helped.” Like he was gonna give Sydney the appeal of knowing where Jarin had gone. What the hell was it to him anyway? He was just some Western hick who didn’t know how to ride. It didn’t matter to him whether Jarin went anywhere!
    He didn’t believe for a second that Jarin wasn’t involved in some way. No way someone just rides around with another fully tacked horse. As soon as he was finished up, he’d be paying Jarin a visit...he had a sneaking suspicion that he wouldn’t find him home. That dumbass never could follow instructions right. “Get lost,” he spat at Tristan.

     “Jarin, you’re not being very fair to me. Hidin’ all this shit from me.”
     “I just want to do things that make me happy. You make me happy and riding makes me happy and those are the things I want to do.”

    Jarin had jogged a little ways further up the trail, around Sydney. He peeked around a tree until Sydney had walked off with Tango. He sighed heavily. He felt so terrible for hiding from Sydney. This wasn’t like him at all. He shouldn’t feel so scared to be around him. Sure, Sydney was rough around the edges but there was a sweet guy in there that came through every once in a while. Maybe, if he took the time to explain properly what he wanted, he’d come around to the idea of letting him ride with Tristan.
    Jarin jogged back over to Tristan and took Shifty back. He certainly looked troubled and worn down, “Sorry about that. I just...needed to go.”  He mounted up and gave a little smile, “I’m good to go on if you are…”
    “I don’t know whether I’m proud of you or just straight-up confused. You don’t need to just sprint away from him you know. The hillbilly’s dumb enough, probably wouldn’t have even noticed you there,” he said with a wry chuckle, just letting Rusi stretch out in a walk for a bit before he picked her back up into a very neat collected trot. “Come on then, let’s carry on…”
    Tristan had noted, as they went along, that the moment they turned back toward the barn, Jarin started to look more paranoid again, and had effectively started to have a meltdown the moment that the barn came into sight… he had no idea why Jarin was acting so weird… Maybe, a break away from the barn was for the best for today. Anyone knew, having spent any time around Jarin, lessons were meaningless when he was acting like someone had a gun to his head.
    Tristan sighed. Maybe he could use a break from the barn too. Just for today.


(1400 word count)
yea, i hit that even number on purpose. fight me~

Sacrifice(mature content warning) <---- Previous || Next ---> Take Everything (NSFW mature content warning)
If you would like to skip past the nudes, here is the user-friendly next bit of the story: Not Good Not Great

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Jarin being a bad boy. And Sydney continuing to be unswayed in his ways. He said "no." If we ignore Sydney being a controlling dickhead for just a second, tho, maybe not completely unjust when he's mad about telling his secret little lover about what he doesn't like and his secret little lover still doing those irritating things. 

Sydney: can u not
Jarin: ok!
Also Jarin: *does those things anyway*
Sydney: >:V dafuq betch

On Jarin's side; HE JUST WANTS TO MAKE EVERYBODY HAPPY. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR. (yes. yes, it is.)

Tried something a little different for myself art-wise! I was feeling pretty crap on this piece for some time. Just feeling off on it but I slogged through xD I knew I wasn't going to have the energy to do a tradi background so I just cut out the sketches completely and worked from there. After about 500 background attempts later, I finally found something I liked! 
A shout out to baaltas for posting some art process stuff! Like, I've broken down composition before but to see it simplified even more really tapped into my three brain cells xD THANK YOU FOR THE INSPIRATION <3



Naked Sketch: 

Bays <3 Roans <3

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Jarin/Sydney/Rusi/Tango/Art © Drasayer
Tristan/Shifty/RP words © Saoradh 
No specific refs used. 
Thank you oxymelon for the octopus wiener idea on the pants xD


Photoshop CS6