As the title suggests this is a apology, and a much needed one at that.
I know my activity hasn't been... the best over the past few months, and I didn't really tell anyone what was happening or why I just fell of the edge of the world so that's what I am here to do now.
Crap was happening in my life that I was not use to. It has been building up for a while now and when I had trouble with a project I was working on I finally snapped, I was desperately trying to relieve this sudden stress in my life so I took a few days off from anything internet related, Pixelmon, friends, TFL, everything. It was just suppose to be a few days to catch my breath and I decided to do it spontaneously so I didn't tell anyone. I gave myself a project that I told myself once I finished it I would return, and show it off to everyone and hopefully be less stressed in the process.It was just suppose to be a few days...
But it quickly turned into weeks.
And every day that passed I felt a sense of dread building. I knew
I was taking to long, that I needed to tell you what was happening, I needed to just TALK TO YOU GUYS
. But no, I kept putting it off because every time I thought of it my mind raced to all the questions everyone would have, about the reason I had vanished. And I would have to tell you that I didn't have one. The guilt I felt for skewing some of you guys over by saying I would do something, and then never acting on it, and just.... feeling like I abandoned you all. All that together just overwhelmed me, so I told myself I would FOR SURE do it tomorrow. Its amazing how tomorrow always turns into today .-.
I know that you guys probably would not care, or at least not nearly as much as I think you guys do. You would just rather have me back. I know
this. I know
I know this. But yet I felt too guilty to act on this knowledge.
In my defense, the whole questions thing has some truth in it. I tried to log onto Skype twice, and both times it kinda..... crashed.... ya... (I don't think I am getting on skype anytime soon)
Gaa, I have never been good at expressing my feelings ;-;
So, no, I am not actively trying to ignore you, avoid you, I don't hate you and I am not mad at you, I just kinda became a turtle and hid in my shell for a few months and I am not fully back..... But I am getting there c:
Another thing, For now I am against instant messaging. I know its great for getting a hold of me instantly at anytime, but I don't want people to be able to instantly get a hold of me at any time! Its the main reason I don't have a cell phone and hate texting for petes sake. It doesn't give me time to to think about or prepare a response, and when I got 5+ people wanting me to have a active conversation with me all at the same time.... I CANT HANDLE THAT KIND OF RESPONSIBILITY ;-;
.... so.... ya...
Get me some pigeons in here!
....Or email/Note me/tweet me/anything-that-I-can-put-off-for-ten-minutes-and-not-feel-like-a-horrible-person....
(but fair notice, my notes on DA have been kinda... glitchy.... So if you sent me a note and I never responded, its probably because I never got it. It seems to be fixed now, but ya...)
(also you can email me at hswedin @ gmail dot com)
(and I just found out like yesterday I have a twitter lol twitter.com/DragonsPainter
the more you know)
(also also, I got a tumbler finally but I expect it to die in a fiery mess because I have no idea how to use it)
PS: Expect a lot of submissions over the next week or so, and a lot of personal art to get back in the swing of things.
Oh, and some of these submissions are Plushes I made in my absence so keep your eye out for that
I love how I say every journal that I am going to post more journals.