Since you don't know I live in Texas. We get the full heat in Summer and can get very cold in Winter. As i'm a bit old I don't weather either as well as I used to. But appreciate them all. However, my favorite is Fall. Give me a cloudy and rainy day and i'm as happy as can be. I remember days as a child reading myth and legend while listening to the rain and drinking a hot chocolate or tea. For me the heat of Summer brings me close to the reality of this world. While the overcast cold takes me to the borders of imagination. These dreary days of rain and chill fire the imagination and loosens the bonds of what is real and what is possible. It's in these days that myth and legend come alive.
There was a time when i would take every excuse to go for a walk in the wood, run errands, and best of all go to the gamestore. European Crossroads was a shopping center surrounded by tall trees with cobblestones and shops in the old European style. When you walked across the bridge into the streets you entered another world. I vividly remember the shop with its period music and games and books galore. And sadly me always poor as could be. Those were the days when gaming both scifi and fantasy were becoming popular and fantasy novels were all the rage. Thats where I met the works of Frank Frazetta and the adventures of Conan. I ventured so many places and myself built so many worlds in those days. Then I found the Halfprice Bookstore and I was lost. How fondly I remember those days. All I was tied to was 40 hours a week of working but the rest of my time was for fantasy and adventure.
I vowed so many times to bring those worlds and adventures to life. My reason for doing 3d was to illustrate myth and legend of my worlds. I had so much drive and so many plans then. There is a feeling when you are young, an urgency to do. You feel as if the universe will end if you don't _____. Come to find out later in life that it isn't true. Nothing will end but the dreams and no one will notice. Thats why I say go for your dreams while you can, don't put it off. Because nearer the end you realise it's ok that it never happened. The big source of my issues i think has been letting go. And it's ok because the dream never dies it transforms. Our lives change and we change oh so much...so why shouldn.t our dreams evolve with us. What I insist on from myself has also changed. What had gone before is no longer acceptable. maybe I will learn new tools and maybe not. There are more important things in life. I doubt realistically speaking that there is time to reach a quality level that is needed. It's quite sobering to realise that you probably don't have enough time to become good at anything. Life doesn't really give you choices.
Some things never change tho. its cool and drizzly and I am taking several excuses to run errands lol. I will take it slow and enjoy while I can. And I will create what I can and it wont be acceptable to me but I do accept that it's all that I can do. And maybe I will still be able to slip into that dark at the edge of the woods and see what I can see.
Seek adventure, seek wonder, time is shorter than we know.