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Fix Me by DestinyBlue Fix Me by DestinyBlue
You've done your best with the tools you've got, but what if it's still not good enough?

Ask for help.




Today I'm going into hospital.

I am being taken to stay in a psychiatric ward again for a bit while I try and get my brain better.

Everyday is tough, I've tried really hard to do nurturing things and stay positive. I think I've done pretty well, considering. But I need to accept that I can't do it on my own at the moment, I need help. 

Doctors are not sure of my diagnosis, my symptoms are more complex than depression/anxiety. I'm not worried about what they'll label me with, I just want to get better. I've started writing about my experiences, which is helping. I'll share it all with you when I'm stable again. Though presently I can't begin to describe how horrible it's been; except to offer a small insight: I feel like death would be better than a life like this.

Yup. I need help.

This illness has taken so much from me. I don't want to let it take my life too...

Peace, Love and Asking for Help,
~Featured Artwork~

Bulletproof by DestinyBlue Anxiety by DestinyBlue I'm Complicated by DestinyBlue Impatience by DestinyBlue Trust by DestinyBlue Dark Side by DestinyBlue
Add a Comment:
 
:iconkuronekokeef:
KuroNekoKeef Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2018  Professional Artist
Beautiful !
Everything is beautiful, colors/tones/shadings/lights ... character pose/gesture/attitude/expression ... atmosphere ... intensity ... your art talking so much !
Reply
:iconabu4tw:
Abu4tw Featured By Owner Jul 6, 2018
Remember there will always be people there to support you. Whether you want them to or not.
Reply
:iconmrfrigginsuspenders:
MrFrigginSuspenders Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2018
...and then there's 4chan and r/edgymemes, where topics like suicide and mental health are a never-ending gold mine for dark humor...
...not that i see it as a problem, tho
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:iconpaladinpainter:
PaladinPainter Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2018  Professional Digital Artist
Just awesome What? 
Reply
:iconoktargai:
Oktargai Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2018  Professional Digital Artist
Magic colors
Reply
:iconahanu-the-grimreaper:
Ahanu-The-GrimReaper Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2018  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I hope you get better soon! Your art is amazing BTW!
Reply
:icontshadowangel:
Tshadowangel Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2018  Hobbyist Artist
When you try your best but you don't succeed...

When you get what you want, but not what you need...
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:iconmerylove1:
merylove1 Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2018  Hobbyist Digital Artist
CUTE
Reply
:iconyatotally-0:
yatotally-0 Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2018
<3 ur art, get better soon!
Reply
:iconsimplyimperfections:
SimplyImperfections Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2018  Hobbyist General Artist
Good luck, god bless you :D
Reply
:iconaverageotakugirl:
AverageOtakuGirl Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2018  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Love this! Get better, you have all of my love and support :heart:
Reply
:iconhellypse:
Hellypse Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2017  Professional Digital Artist
Awww... I wish you'll get well as soon as possible é_è

:hug:
Reply
:iconwonderwoman07:
Wonderwoman07 Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2017
I hope you get well soon. I love that drawing. 
Reply
:icondc3atflabob:
dc3atflabob Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2017
Asking for help is the bravest thing a person can do, so I guess that means your brave as hell
Reply
:iconzalloy:
Zalloy Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2017
Hope you get all the help you need to feel better! Good luck, stay strong and hopefully, get better soon!

My hope is that since this is a near two year old post. You've been feeling way better by nowadays. Still felt like the message was worth saying!

And again, have another *Huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuug!* <3
Reply
:icondazdn:
dazdn Featured By Owner Edited Sep 26, 2017
Never be afraid to ask for help.  You'd be surprised at finding out who is travelling that same road as you. 

Admitting you need help is the first step.  That first step and asking for help are big acts of bravery. 

Best of luck in your journey to healing.  We're rooting for you!
Reply
:iconyamagi40:
yamagi40 Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2017
Like it
Reply
:icondaisytries:
DaisyTries Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2017
I love it!!!
Reply
:iconpoppymarlow:
poppymarlow Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2017  Student Filmographer
Gorgeous Artwork

And good luck to the future! You'll get through it I promise! :)
Reply
:iconlentpirls:
lentpirls Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2017
Lovely image; full of feeling
Reply
:iconmaehedrose:
Maehedrose Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2017
I understand the kind of suffering you're going through on a very personal level.  I was diagnosed with Schizoaffective Disorder and have suffered under the weight of depression all my life (but worse in the last few years).  I don't know your precise symptoms, so giving advice can be difficult, but I have recently found that talking back to that inner voice which constantly tells me how worthless I am, does help.  I'm not saying get into conversations with yourself, but vocally reject the voice's statements when they are made - either by saying "bullshit, that's not the truth and I reject that narrative!" or saying "you're right but those horrible things are in my past and I'm moving forward without them".  Fighting the voices in silence tends to be the default but it isn't as helpful (for me, at least) as speaking out against them.  

What I can tell you is, if you've not done it yet, I wouldn't recommend Electro Convulsive Therapy - it only made me *more* depressed than I had been before, but also stole two months worth of memories from me and left huge holes in my long term memories - some of which I've yet to get back two years later.  But, worst of all, I used to be an avid reader and skilled writer (told so by professors and authors) prior to my ECT but now cannot read a book for more than 15 minutes and have barely been interested in or able to write anything.  I had thought that nothing could be worse than how I felt prior to the treatment - I was wrong.  I have managed to recover a little in the last year but that has been about hard work in changing the way I perceive myself and the world and not the electro-shock. 

I will warn you that, should you feel compelled to do so, killing yourself is a lot harder than it seems - harder than you'd think it should be - and if you fail, you'll end up with a bunch of horrible repercussions for trying ... so better not to do it, in general. 
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:icondreamsayer:
DreamSayer Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2017  Student Digital Artist
Hang in there
Reply
:iconnuenue17:
Nuenue17 Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2017  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Oh wow. I've been hospitalized for treatment about 5 times. I hope you'll get the help you need and feel better! Death is not the answer even if things feel that way. I deal with bipolar depression and have anxiety. I'll be praying for you. 💕
Reply
:iconmagicalflowerbomb:
MagicalFlowerBomb Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2017  Professional Digital Artist
Wow!! You truly very talented person❤️ I invite you to join my group :iconworld-of-art-kingdom: and share your wonderful art with us :clap: and congrats about this amazing art of yours :clap:
Reply
:iconliathedwarf:
liathedwarf Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I had no idea. Things will get better. I promise.
Reply
:icontortive:
Tortive Featured By Owner Jun 9, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
Aww... I wish I knew how...
Reply
:iconrachelillustrates:
rachelillustrates Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2016  Professional Traditional Artist
Having read the 4 parts of your story so far, this is such a sweetly-sad expression of the day you posted it. I'm so glad you got help and hope you're continuing to grow and heal.

Thank you for encouraging others to get help, too. Myself included.
Reply
:iconskorky:
skorky Featured By Owner Nov 29, 2016  Professional Digital Artist
good
Reply
:icongrace-of-the-muses:
Grace-of-the-Muses Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2016  Student Traditional Artist
Things get better, I promise. Love you and praying for you <3
Reply
:iconanimegirl513:
AnimeGirl513 Featured By Owner Nov 10, 2016
Incredibly brilliant! How we all feel once in awhile when depression takes over.
Reply
:icondemiprimordialgal:
demiprimordialgal Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
it's kinda ironic when you invert the colours. it looks as if she's glowing in the middle of destruction.
Reply
:iconkockadoodle:
Kockadoodle Featured By Owner Edited Sep 20, 2016  Hobbyist Artist
I'm certainly a fan!
Reply
:iconkockadoodle:
Kockadoodle Featured By Owner Sep 20, 2016  Hobbyist Artist
Man!.....you certainly know what your doing with your colors. I see a lot of experience that it must be like your 100th painting lol. Good work!
Reply
:iconhenke76:
Henke76 Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2016
nice
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:icontyrantaur123:
Tyrantaur123 Featured By Owner May 21, 2016
I hope things get better for you, your art inspired me lots you can't even imagine. I am more than willing to help in any possible way. We, your fans/watchers will all be there for you. With lots of love, ~Tyrann
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:iconabitheperson:
AbiThePerson Featured By Owner May 21, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
It gets better, I really hope things clear up for you soon. Sending love and good thoughts your way. ♥
Reply
:iconsuzybabi:
SUZYBABI Featured By Owner May 19, 2016
loved 
Reply
:iconwaterenchanter:
WaterEnchanter Featured By Owner May 17, 2016  Student General Artist
I just want to say that ever since I stumbled across your Deviantart page, my mind has been constantly awash with ideas. You have inspired me loads during the past few months, and if someday I create artwork that is even half as good as yours, that would be the most amazing thing.
Your art always seems to have some deeper meaning, like it's not just a pretty drawing, but it feels like you've poured your whole heart and soul into each image.
Thank you ever so much for all the inspiration. Get well soon, and keep inspiring people.
- Mo
Reply
:icondehpandalover:
DehPandaLover Featured By Owner May 17, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Hope you get better. You seem like an amazing person. I just stumbled upon your art and it's already taken away my heart. Get better soon, bc if you leave, our souls will leave with you.
~Mia
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:iconpopshopuk:
popshopuk Featured By Owner May 16, 2016  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
:icanfixit: 
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:iconzalarhiee:
ZaLaRhIee Featured By Owner May 14, 2016  Student Traditional Artist
wow this is awesome
Reply
:iconc0rwyn:
c0rwyn Featured By Owner May 6, 2016  Professional Writer
Adorbs.
Reply
:iconarjaysking:
ArjaySKing Featured By Owner Apr 25, 2016  Hobbyist Photographer
Your artwork has been featured here:
arjaysking.deviantart.com/jour…
Reply
:iconaltback:
altback Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2016
beautiful!
Reply
:iconshadoethegrey:
ShadoeTheGrey Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2016  Student General Artist
Get better blue! None of us want you to leave. You and your art have left an impression upon our hearts, so deep that if you leave, our hearts would go with you. I have gone through what you are going through right now. Believe me, you will make it.

Stay Strong!
Reply
:iconseptembergarden:
SeptemberGarden Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Hey i made thoes same picture.Hahahahaha
Reply
:iconboogiebites:
boogiebites Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2016  Student General Artist
That's heartbreaking to hear. I am so sorry for you. I am not sure if you want my sympathy, if you don't feel free to hide this comment.

I really hope you get better, you are an amazing person and an even better artist. You have a long life ahead of you. Make the best of what you have now, keep a tally of all the amazing things in your mind. Just like life was given to you, it can be taken away.
         Stay strong and keep fighting. Stay positive, rant, scream, cry, laugh, smile, be amazing. If you ever need to talk to me hun, I am here for you. I will always be here, so feel free to send me a note.
           We all love you. 

Skittles~
Reply
:iconrose73259:
Rose73259 Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2016
OH MY GOSH IT'S BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply
:iconalliwannadoissleep:
AllIWannaDoIsSleep Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2016
We all hope you get better Blue xxx
get well soon

-Ashley
Reply
:iconclowderorigins:
ClowderOrigins Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Keeping you in my prayers, I hope you can get better as soon as possible. Stay safe and please know we're here for you! Hug Heart 
Reply
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