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Lightning won't matter
To the man who'll doubt
The idea of true love at first sight:

Because lightning won't matter
To the man who'll not part
In haste, the entirety of his heart.

Because lightning won't matter
To the man who'll listen
For the lady who speaks when her soul glistens.

Because lightning won't matter
To the man who'll caress
A body he knows will never perish.

Because lightning won't matter
To the man who'll ingest
Her serene and pure, mind-soothing breath.

The view of a lady
Cannot change his mind,
Because lightning won't matter
To the man who is blind.
October 19, 2010
Christopher Michael Speciale

They say love hits you like lightning.
What if you can't see? How do you find love?
The blind man knows...

It's not really a villanelle. I thought that if it were a real villanelle then it would ruin the ending in some way (cause I couldn't think of any other way to write it.) So it's in the right stanza-form, just not the right line-form (if that makes any sense). :XD: Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it! :heart:

For Critique: This deviation is just another one of my romantic bits, I write a lot of those. But this one, I feel particularly accomplished of because of... *sigh* I can never really explain why. I guess it's b/c of the way I wrote it--it's different than how I write a lot of my poetry. Anyway, what I'm asking for in a critique is if it actually brings about any emotions in you, any at all, and how powerful the poem forces them out.

:iconmyartplz:
2010 Christopher Michael Speciale
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:iconladysparra:
ladysparra Featured By Owner Dec 19, 2010
You're a very inspiring writer. I really love your work; each piece has a true voice of its own. Please don't give up writing, it would be such a waste of your amazing way with words. :#1:
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:icondavidtarr:
DavidTarr Featured By Owner Dec 19, 2010
Aaawww, thank you! :love:
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:iconpotentialheartbreak:
potentialheartbreak Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2010
this is frieking amazing. so creative. never would have guessed the ending. absolutely amazing.
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:icondavidtarr:
DavidTarr Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2010
Awws! :D "frieking" AND "absolutely" amazing, you say? I'm flabberghasted! (sp?)
Thank you! :heart:
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:iconpotentialheartbreak:
potentialheartbreak Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2010
hahahhaha i use...dramatic words(: it's really amazing though. no problem!
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:icondavidtarr:
DavidTarr Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2010
flabberghasted is pretty dramatic, dontcha think? :D
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:iconpotentialheartbreak:
potentialheartbreak Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2010
yes! i love that word! hahaha
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:iconalyth3cat:
alyth3cat Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2010
I really loved this. That last stanza was very powerful! :dance: way to go!
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:icondavidtarr:
DavidTarr Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2010
The last stanza is my favorite! ^_^ Thank you again! :heart:
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:iconalyth3cat:
alyth3cat Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2010
Certainly! :)
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:icontearmeapartidontcare:
TearMeApartIDontCare Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
This = beautiful. You're very talented!!
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:icondavidtarr:
DavidTarr Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2010
Aaawww, thank you!! :love:
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:icontearmeapartidontcare:
TearMeApartIDontCare Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Anytime! :)
Reply
:icondoglover3212:
doglover3212 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2010
Beautiful poem. Nice job. :) I enjoyed it very much.
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:icondavidtarr:
DavidTarr Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2010
Well, thank YOU, very much! :love:
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:icondoglover3212:
doglover3212 Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2010
You're welcome. :D
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:iconrevenantu:
revenantu Featured By Owner Oct 31, 2010
Definitely caught me off guard with the ending, in a delightful way. Great piece!
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:icondavidtarr:
DavidTarr Featured By Owner Oct 31, 2010
Haha, thank you very much! :love:
Reply
:iconenigmatic-infelicity:
Enigmatic-Infelicity Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
I love the last stanza. Its simple but its really moving :)
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:icondavidtarr:
DavidTarr Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2010
The last stanza was really the only one I loved also. x) I didn't spend a lot of time working on the other ones. Thank you's!! :love:
Reply
:iconenigmatic-infelicity:
Enigmatic-Infelicity Featured By Owner Oct 25, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
Your very welcome :)
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