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benthic contractions
mother earth clenches her pain
tsunami is born
Unlike most of my other haiku, this effort was not prompted by something I saw. Instead, a word sprang to mind, and I found myself wondering what I could do with it -- and that led to this ...

Oh, and the word I originally thought of? Well, it never made the final version... ;-)

Update: For those who are wondering, the original word that got me thinking along these lines in the first place was "pelagic" (obvious really... ;-))

Edit, Jan 2004: I am currently working through my gallery and providing a " proper" preview image for those deviations that didn't originally have one. I apologise to all those watching me if this causes these old poems to be flagged as "new". The image in this thumbnail is from Sea Wave, by ~ spirit-stock.
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:iconspiritguide:
spiritguide Featured By Owner Mar 9, 2004
Benthic, now I learned a new word as well!

Nice piece, and thanks for the credit on my sea wave!
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:icondarkphoenix:
darkphoenix Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2004  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you -- and you're welcome. :D
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:iconpoetrymachine:
poetrymachine Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2002  Hobbyist Writer
dude... i never knew hgaiku's could be so deep... awesome. Could not be a better choice of words.
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:iconfatelessmirror:
fatelessmirror Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2002

Damn this is great! It hit me so unexpected--that is a major thing.

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:iconversifier:
versifier Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2002
wow...nice one...

So much imagery in that......thats the true embodiment of a haiku.....

Brilliant work.
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:iconskyorange:
skyOrange Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2002
that is very kewl. very climactic. your haikus always make me smile.
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:iconthelonius:
thelonius Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2002
im afraid in a poem of such few words the choice of those words becomes one of the primary aspects of the poem, and clenches her pain is quite akward and distracting from the rest of the poem. good idea though.
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:icondeejbard:
deejbard Featured By Owner Jul 10, 2002
wonderful.
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:iconnamaste:
namaste Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2002
that's an excellent haiku. tight and perceptive. +fav :) (Smile)
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:iconhedda:
hedda Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2002
that is a absolutely brilliant haiku... OMG

I am duly impressed.... I think haikus are such a difficult form - to be able to capture the essence or ideas within the structure takes talent (I keep trying at these and it is HARD)

I love the metaphor you use here... the "mother earth" and birth.... it's great..

+fav
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:iconmastermindg:
mastermindg Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2002
wow, thats pretty cool man. id still like to know the original word =D (Big Grin)

hey, i never knew somebody had a similar name. cool.
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:iconwindigo:
windigo Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2002
I love this haiku! each word is so well chosen.
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:iconmattspire:
MattSpire Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2002  Professional Digital Artist
i love this... one of the most original haikus i've read. you describe things very succinctly. i would have unnecessarily written 10 stanzas to describe this.... =p (Razz) and you said 'benthic' ... :D (Big Grin)

makin me curious as to what the original word you wanted to use was.... ;) (Wink)
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:iconirishdrifter:
irishdrifter Featured By Owner Jun 15, 2002  Hobbyist Writer
nice imagery, great emotion
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:iconaki:
aki Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2002
I think this goes along very well with my Dev ID....
Nice work!
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:iconmisomaniac:
misomaniac Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2002
benthic contractions / mother earth: excellent link. I had no idea what benthic meant and was thinking about earthquakes. Dictionaries are so handy. Lacks the poetic contradiction of most haikus, though.
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:iconthemadpoet:
themadpoet Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2002
very nicely done...i am too verbose for haiku lol...thanks for the comment
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:icondark-phoenix:
dark-phoenix Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2002   Writer
Some nice stuff, it makes me think of a print I saw when I was in Japan. And as an added bonus, I learned a cool new word! Yay!

Well I've known about you since my first submission (someone else made the observation) but the hyphen was entirely my thought ;) (Wink) I've not really had the chance to look over much of your stuff but what I have seen is very good. I'm proud I accidently chose a name so close to yours :) (Smile)
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:icondr-d:
dr-d Featured By Owner Jun 13, 2002
crap, meant to vote on that
here ya go!
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:icondr-d:
dr-d Featured By Owner Jun 13, 2002
hmmm... benthic. is that something to do with underwater plates?
well written.

that's great you were able to discard the original word. My OCD kicks in when I start an idea like that, lol, I just have to use it.
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:iconwildmonky:
wildmonky Featured By Owner Jun 13, 2002  Student Writer
Well I had to look benthic. Obscure, I'm assuming. Maybe I'm just ignorant. :D (Big Grin)

This is a very descriptive haiku. I like it.

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