I know this is random but I'm in one hell of a funk artistically. So what better way is there to spend my indefinite free time (outside of my tedious deliberate practice, of course)?
I'd like to mention that out of all of my inspirations, the artist who has inspired me the most is . This artist has inspired my style since around 2009/10 as I gradually went back from my cutesy style to my more "manly" artwork. I have no idea how or when I came across their work but thankfully I have. It's too bad it's been almost 4 years since any updates here and I'm not sure if they've uploaded anyplace else lately.
First off, not many people I know have actually played and enjoyed any of the Final Fantasy XIII games. I got a lot of my inspiration and joy around 2010-2014 from those games and I still occasionally go back to them as the soundtrack and the nostalgia interest me. I do LOVE Final Fantasy and Square Enix in general. I went back to see a journal stating that they played XIII-2!
More importantly, there are striking resemblances to several of their designs and interpretations in comparison to the ones I have created strictly from subconscious and an overall similarity in intended aesthetic. It was probably from browsing their gallery often back then. Like these for example:
Yeah, so I've been in a "dark" place lately being unhappy with my life, myself and my artwork and fortunately I'm slowly recovering while the mystery of my "demise" remains in the back of my mind. It feels like an aura of impending rejection every time I upload a drawing or leave a comment. It makes me very upset at myself for forgetting what was important to me these past few years after that and I always wonder what I could've been even though schoolwork brought me down. I never intended to be "popular", attract "special" artists or suffer through social art politics and cliques or whatever. I just wanted to draw my own characters, give them life and be comfortable. Depending on my designs, they were supposed to be excuses for learning anatomy and other things simultaneously. This is why I like jinx-star's gallery and overall style.
The artwork of jinx-star is very comforting and well-paced (with work dating back to around 2004 so since their last uploads, it was up to 2012 making it about 8 years out of the 11 on that account). Their style is also "Eastern" with "Western" inspirations and simply done in pencil with special effects or even a smooth digital paint style also with special effects. There are no real backgrounds or anything: just the aesthetic. I've always wanted to achieve this at least since not everybody has the patience to do HQ/CG renders all day. It's okay to leave certain things to other people if that's not what you like to do. The worst thing to have when struggling to regain confidence as an artist is to be overwhelmed.
Thank you for your time.
On a side note, it's only okay to compare yourself to other artists if that's your preference. I hope I'm wrong but I feel like I've been compared to too many artists through outside people so when they come to my gallery, instead of appreciating me for being me, they become disappointed and leave shortly after. I'm terribly sorry for inciting such confusion as I do draw inspiration from multiple artists. Now I've also been told that a few folks secretly have works inspired by my works as well. It's fine to be inspired like that but just don't deliberately steal.
(I also had internet problems for about a year now and for 5 days a week I suffer with it therefore I cannot bring myself to use it often and be very active online much anymore. My data plan is even more unreliable and there's only so much you can do on a smartphone. I know it sucks.)
- Reading: My typed text
- Playing: Final Fantasy XV or Tales of Berseria, etc.
- Drinking: Water