CycKath

Despite the lofty hopes, January 2015 has not been a great month for me, either with my art or in general full stop. Not in a good place in mind or body.

The physical side is basically calcific tendinitis of my shoulder. I hurt my shoulder last year between work and playing with my two active little boys, but in true male health style I just ignored it as it settled down, waved away the continuing twinges and assumed it was just me getting old. Until January when I'm having trouble sleeping unless using pain killers and in very clear discomfort when ever I moved my arm that my co-workers and wife alike strongly suggested I go to the doctor. They assumed initially it was just inflamation but ultrasound found multiple calcium deposits, at this stage they believed a cortisone injection to manage the pain would allow me to just break up the deposits via normal movement, but that didn't happen and on the day before my birthday (perfect timing) they were shoving a large gauge needle into my shoulder to smash up and water down the final one inch deposit so my body can break it up. My arm while on pain killers is uncomfortable, but less cranky daddy as my boys put it.

The rest of my torment is mental or emotional - job troubles. I moved to my current employer about seven years ago, just two months before my first son was born. In many respects it was a terrific opportunity, moving up the ISP helpdesk food chain from tier 1 ("Are you sure you have powercycled your router ma'am?") to tier 2 ("I know she told you she powercycled her router, but if you look at these results I'm not seeing an updated last change time. Please confirm with her, okay?") for better money and more chance of advancement. Eventually though I hit the point that short of death or retrenchment that I couldn't advance in that team any further, so I tried to go side-ways and accepted a position in our NOC team. I had the basics and undertook hands-on training and book learning, but my old team had a number of people go on maternity leave (one as mum, one as dad) and I got roped in to do my new job AND gap fill my old job. The fact that it was easier to get me to help out occasionally rather than employ a temp might have been a missed warning sign...

It was impossible to miss the sign things were perhaps a bit rocky when they announced that within a week after returning from Christmas break that they were stream lining the NOC team and I'd be back in my old wholesale support job immediately, my training (except that I was paying for myself outside of work) to cease immediately too . My pay hasn't take a hit, and given the choice between no job and an effective demotion, I took the demotion. And then came the meetings explaining why the streamlining, my old/current team is to be detached off and merged into another to form a brand new company entirely, intended to be a dynamic and more agile company.

This isn't an excuse, or a demand for forgiveness or donations, just venting a little perhaps.