Five Guys in Five Days

The Five Guys were getting ready. They had been training for months with the most intense techniques available to trainers. They did the most complex stretches that any one had ever done and they stretched to the greatest of each individual’s abilities. They could stretch to extremes that none of them had ever thought would be possible before they started their training. The reason that they were training so intensely and in such a manner is because they all planned to take part in a Great Race, the race that would determine would would become the Greatest Guy of all the Five Guys. The Great Race was the biggest event the Guys had ever heard of. In fact, it was the greatest race ever held for

   The Five Guys had been practicing on a great, big field. The field stretched farther than any one Guy could could ever hope to see, in every direction. The guys all layed down and stretched, trying to cover as much of the field as possible. Each guy was very large and was able to cover an impressive amount of the field. More than any other person who ever lived could ever hope to cover. In fact, these Five Guys were the biggest and most flexible Guys who ever existed. Each one was able to fill the field in a way that was impressive and impossible to most. The experience of an individual Guy was scary and intense. First, all their bones dislocated from each other. All their joints melted then evaporated out of their pores. It took a lot of mental concentration and positive thinking to remind the Guys that they would be back to normal after they finished their stretches. All their bones became individual agents in their bodies, and almost like magnets repelling each other, stretched their skin and blood to their absolute tolerances. The rich, tan pigment of each Guys’ skin turned to a bright white under this strain, so bright it reflected the sun in such an intense way that it looked like five flat suns were plotted on the field, which happened to be green from all the grass. The boys screamed from the terrible pain in a beautiful way. Their screams harmonized and attracted a lot of birds to the field. The birds that were unfortunate enough to fly between the sun and the boys melted instantly.

The melted birds fell on the backs of the Guys and formed elaborate patterns and mandalas permanently burnt the skin of the Guys. Once the guys were so burned that they no longer reflected the light of the sun to such a high degree, they slowly began to unstretch. The process was just as painful as the process of stretching, the boys hummed in agony for exactly  five years as their bodies reassembled slowly but surely into their original forms. The Guys had decided to perform their stretch over a five year span because each day of the Great Race would require a year’s worth of stretching.

They race to the desert to warm up. They race to this song:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=IGMabB…

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