Allo', allo', allo' guys and gals! Name's Jibber, Jibber-Jabbber to be exact! Might of heard of me old man, Mr Punch and his Mrs, Judy (Right shame bout' them two. It all ended with a 999 call, a close shave with a cheese grater and a very sticky blender. Tragic but sort of inevitable). Me, I make it my mission to bring smiles and joy to all the little boys and girls. A Zykoln-B Pie here, a razor blade apple there, and wash it all down with Gangrene candy floss!
Little Tim didn't take too kind to my kind of fun. Said it war right naff. Not his exact words but I couldn't bring meself to use the kind of rotten language in polite company. What are you lot teaching your kids these days? But I took him round the back of the old snake oil and seal skin factory and taught him a thing or two. I just love putting a smile on the little uns' faces I do. Granted theyr'e held there with staples but a fella does what he can. Now, who wants some snacks?