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About Deviant Celynne30/Female/Canada Group :iconspiderlovers: SpiderLovers
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by TD-Vice

You have a few little mistakes, "disturbing the grass and it's inhabitants." should be its, no apostrophe. And "workout" is not a verb,...

by TD-Vice

I must argue with you when you say this piece is not entertaining. Perhaps not in the way you meant it, but it certainly entertains the...

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So as I'm back in school full time for the semester and between professional co-ops, I've returned to my mall retail job. I work in a shop that sells American candy (a huge deal in Canada where it's not readily available), board games, overpriced mugs, novelty socks, Trump toilet paper and various other useless junk. It's in the "nice" mall, where all the stores cater to a more affluent market (there is no dollar store in this mall, but there are 3 jewellers and a Lulu Lemon).

I'd sort of forgotten over the summer how absolutely depressing most mall shoppers' lives must be. I'm only part-time and yet I see the same people over and over, multiple times a week, sometimes more than once in the same day. That's something I half expect from kids who's parents just drop them off when it opens/after school and pick them up at close but a lot of them are grown adults. How sad is your life that you came to the mall two days in a row over the weekend just to stare at all the same shit you stared at yesterday? Could you not be spending your time better elsewhere?

Not to mention the griping about prices. You have a bag from Victoria's Secret, I think you can afford to shop here (unlike our staff who make minimum wage and would have to work over an hour just to buy a pair of socks). And worse is the adults who gripe about the price of a quality board game (basically the only things in this store I feel have any real worth) and then spend $40 on slime kits and squishy poops (yes, this is a thing, it's a poo-shaped stress ballesque type thing with eyes and we sell them for $8.99 CAD). You could've bought a nice game for that but instead you bought garbage that will land in the bin or forgotten in a corner after 10 minutes. Good choice.

I've never been a fan of humanity in general but working here just drives home what vapid, empty consumerist lives most people live. Spending your weekend trying to find that one Paw Patrol stuffy your kid "needs" or buying all sorts of cheap clothes "on sale" (spoiler: everything is always On Sale at the mall to sucker the people who are too stupid to know better) that you're not likely to wear is absolutely depressing.

The mall is not a hobby! The mall is not your babysitter! Go learn a skiljl! Go outside! How is it possibly enjoyable to just march around the mall all weekend every weekend?!

:icontealdeerplz: Working in the fancy mall makes me hate vapid consumerist zombie humans even moar than I did before.
Those of you who've read my last few posts know I'm in a shit living situation that is really unhealthy for me both physically and mentally. For those of you that didn't, see here: forum.deviantart.com/community… and forum.deviantart.com/community… and forum.deviantart.com/community…

Well I told my partner I'm moving out last night. Aaaand I still feel like garbage, just different garbage. I went from feeling like I had a vice around my heart and a knot in the pit of my stomach from the stress of having to tell him, to now feeling guilty and shameful at hurting him and "doing this to him" as he says. 

He claimed everything he does fails, that everybody abandons him, etc. I don't even know anymore. It's like hello, I am moving out not to break up with you, but to gtfo of this horrible living situation which is unhealthy for me. But he can't see past his own distress and his being "abandoned".

He was going on about how he can't pay his bills and won't be able to pay his insurance and can't even fill up the tank in his truck or buy cigarettes, yet yesterday afternoon he was still talking about spending $400 on a boat?! Then I say well get a job, you've been offered several, and he replies that he refuses to make only $200 a day when the guy he'd be working for makes thousands off his back. Well dude, that's fucking life, that's how this works.

I wish and hope so badly that once I've moved out he sees the error in his ways, cleans up his act, quits drinking (if not entirely, at least less) and gets a real goddamn job and man up already. Even if I'm not a part of his life, I still love the stupid idiot and want the best for him. But he's turning 30 in just a few months, how long can he keep living this fantasy life of his, I don't know...

I'm sick and tired of being torn up inside by all this drama. I didn't put him in this financial position - mine is garbage enough especially now that I'm moving out and will have to spend a good $400 or so more per month that I don't really have - and I don't see how my moving out changes that for him when I'm not helping him pay for any of his stuff. Yeah he uses my car to run errands and stuff, but why should I have to put miles on my car and use my gas just to make his life easier when he doesn't return me the favor?

He told me he just wants to be numb all the time, that he has nothing worth living for or staying for if I go (even though I'll only be a 20 minute drive away, and he would see me more often than when I worked away the last 2 summers) that everything of value to him has been taken away and now I'm leaving too. I hate that he's guilting me like this. I hate that I still feel responsible for his situation somehow.

I wish I had the money to make both our problems all go away. I wish I could just wave a magic wand and make it all better. But as my mother says, wish in one hand and shit in the other and see which fills up first... *sigh*

:icontealdeerplz: My life is a mess and my partner says I'm abandoning him because I'm moving out of the hell that is the household we share with his parents and I feel like a guilty sack of shit. WOO.
I guess some dingdong of a shitty pet owner dumped some goldfish into a small lake in British Columbia (even though, you know, dumping any non-native species into a foreign habitat is about the dumbest thing anybody can do) and now several months later, the lake is positively overrun by schools of goldfish.

:iconfacepalmplz: www.cbc.ca/news/canada/british… and www.theweathernetwork.com/news…

It's a small lake that doesn't seem to outflow to other bodies of water so it's not a province-wide catastrophe in the making but still, that lake's ecosystem is pretty much toast now because of all the damned goldfish. Their options are basically, stun ALL the fish and pick out the goldfish and set the others back into the water (which would have to be done multiple times as new batches hatch out) or poison the whole lake and kill everything :stare:

Plus since goldfish tend to stop growing according to the amount of space and food they've got, these one are getting BIG. They're member of the carp family and we all know how big koi can get so just imagine these goldfish in a nice big lake!

How stupid does someone have to be to think that letting loose foreign fish into a Canadian lake would be a good idea? Just flush the wee buggers if you have a conscience, they won't die immediately so you can feel better and they'll get caught up in the water filtration system (because this isn't a country that lets raw sewage flow freely) rather than be set free into nature and wreck everything.

This country has enough problems with other invasive fish, worms, snails and plants, we really don't need a goldfish problem :crying: 

:icontealdeerplz: THE GOLDFISH ARE TAKING OVER
  • Reading: Baptism of Fire by Andrzej Sapkowski
  • Playing: Stardew Valley
  • Drinking: All the water
I just put most of my gallery into storage. It's not that I so intensely dislike most of it, just that it doesn't really resonate with me anymore. I've come a long way from what I used to post in 2010, you know? By no means am I suddenly going to post masterpieces to take your breath away but... I needed to do some spring cleaning, and it's mostly done now. I can start posting again. I put up a new ID for instance, taken last month in June. I'm still a hippie dork!

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cosmicspider
Celynne
Canada
Look into these eyes now
Tell me what you see
Don't you realize now
What you see is me

Tell me what you see
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:icononemeanmotherfokker:
onemeanmotherfokker Featured By Owner Oct 31, 2018  Hobbyist General Artist
Happpy  birthday!!!!!
Reply
:iconcosmicspider:
cosmicspider Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2018
Thank you!!! .....19 days later :XD:
Reply
:icononemeanmotherfokker:
onemeanmotherfokker Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2018  Hobbyist General Artist
XD You was busy! Pest turned 21 that day too. Old coot horse!
Reply
:icondinoloverxx:
dinoloverXX Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2018  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you for the watch! :D
Here's one from me. :) 
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:iconcosmicspider:
cosmicspider Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2018
Yeah I was basically like THIS PERSON IS ACTUALLY PRETTY AWESOME *watch and friend*
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:icondinoloverxx:
dinoloverXX Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2018  Hobbyist General Artist
Same. :)
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:iconshidaku:
Shidaku Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2018
One good watch deserves another!
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:iconcosmicspider:
cosmicspider Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2018
I've become fond of you, you're like my favourite forum person now :lol: I'm really hard to get rid of once I decide to be your friend :B
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:iconshidaku:
Shidaku Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2018
Well it looks like I'm just going to have to keep you then!
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