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Wearing holiday sweater, with mug of some beverage which I am caught sipping at the beginning of the video in front of me. Christmas tree in back, dark outside to provide better contrast. Music: maybe something silly like crusader theme or the veldt FF song, or possibly some free Christmas music
Oh, hello everypony, Corpulent Brony here! Today I'm going to show all of you socially inept brony loser- I mean, all you beautiful wonderful people how to properly and professionally wrap a gift.

In order to wrap a present you must first acquire one.

Some of the more prosperous like to buy their gifts,
Shot of me dressed up and speaking all hoitey toitey with large roll of money.
others with more talent make gifts.
Shot of me trying and failing miserably to make something
I prefer giving things I own away, it's super classy and is a great way to recycle those items that you no longer really want.
Go through junk drawer or something, muttering to myself, "where that thing be at, I just know she'll love it, bitches love pieces of sh-"
When selecting a gift, don't worry about whether or not you'll be able to wrap it. I've wrapped all sorts of gifts. Long ones, abnormally shaped ones, even wriggling ones.
Show me wrapping cable, wrapping half eaten piece of bread, and wrapping a rat
Once you know what gift to wrap, the next step is to figure out what wrapping paper to use. Make sure it's adequate to the reason for wrapping, whether holiday, birthday, or some other occasion. And always ensure it's covered in ponies.
Show me selecting from various rolls of pony wrapping paper, deep in thought
Now, you're also gonna need some tape. Them rich folks like to use scotch tape, but you can also use duct tape or electrical tape or really anything else you may have lying around.
Show different tapes, would like to find the pony duct tape Maybe also throw in the BD lube, "Oops, how'd that get in here?"
The secret to wrapping a gift and making it look amazing is to not be afraid to use too much tape. Really there is no such thing.
Wrapped gift is covered in tape, multiple kinds
The final step is upon us, intrepid adventurer! Now you must find a worthy recipient to receive your professionally wrapped gift.
Show me handing gift to marefriend, "oh hey, I got you something, sugar cube"

She unwraps it, perhaps with some difficulty, to find a G1 pony that was hers. Reacts

Now with a black eye or some other injury

And that's how you wrap a present. Join me next time as we look into possible cures for black eyes. So long eery pony.
End video maybe in front of TV with fire Blu-ray playing, showing a crackling blaze. Über classy
Clearing out some old scripts and found this.  It was a ton of fon to make this video, I loved doing all the different outtakes.  Anyway, here's what I wrote beforehand as a script.  Not even sure if I ended up following it super religiously or not...

The video is here: www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SzrNJ…
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Submitted on
April 10, 2017
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