Don't Say Stop Believin', Ch.11 (part 1/3)

"Our next category is high school pop and rock music clubs. This year, third place goes to... Yokozuna High!"

Sawako watched the club members take the stage to get their third-place trophy. They were over the moon, and they had a right to be. This category was one of the most crowded at Regionals - finishing third out of 15 schools was something to be proud of.

She sighed. Her club had things to be proud of, but this wasn't going to be one of them. Their moment of triumph had come and gone. Now it was time for the reckoning.

"In second place... Astraea Academy!"

Mio was okay. The rest of the band had brought her back around without too much trouble. Physically, she was none the worse for wear (except a small bruise where she had hit the floor), but she was absolutely mortified about ruining the performance. In the end, everyone had decided it was best not to make her stay for the final rankings. She would be sleeping over with Ritsu tonight, and Sawako (coming off a brief but alarming phone conversation with Chika Kawasumi) had managed to gently nudge Tsumugi into going with them.

Yui and Ui had gone home too - the elder sister still a bit mopey about her first romantic adventure, and the younger eager to get her home before she did anything else crazy. Azusa had been the last holdout. Dutiful as usual, she hadn't wanted to leave the event early or "abandon" her teacher, but Sawako had assured her it was all right. There was really nothing to stay for.

Music contests were many and varied, but there were a few things you could count on. Stage time was always one minute too short for comfort, the distance to the nearest parking space was directly proportional to the weight of your instruments... and drama was worth zero points. An spontaneous on-stage kiss; an instrument-wrecking frenzy of enthusiasm; an awkward, hesitant singer suddenly seeing her distant father in the audience and finding her voice - things like that might be life-changing for the players themselves, but they left the judges cold.

No matter how good the reason, a band that didn't finish its set didn't place. Period.

"And this year's winner..."

There was a drumroll, of course. The teacher sighed.

"...Sasunori High!"

Sawako blinked. No. It can't be. We WON?

"We won!" she screamed. "We won! We actually won! Stick THAT in your pipe and smoke it, Yamada! We wo--"

She stopped. Everyone within several feet was looking at her.

"Um... they did say Sakuragaoka, right?"

"No," said the woman next to her. "Sasunori."

"...Ah."

Fortunately, the crowd was big enough and the applause loud enough that her interruption had gone mostly unnoticed. The Sasunori band was on stage now, jumping up and down in the rush of victory. Camera flashes were going off all over the room. Another year, another deserving winner.

Sawako's heart sank. She realized now that for all her pragmatism, deep down she'd still been hoping for a miracle.

"Congratulations," said the announcer to the Sasunori kids as they left the stage. "And finally, this year we have a special award - an honourable mention for outstanding effort. The winner is... Ryuumei Academy!"

Hmph. Outstanding effort. A consolation prize, in other words. The judges were showing off their kindheartedness. Probably found some constituency they wanted to score points with.

"Ryuumei Academy! Are they here?"

Wait. Wasn't that...

"Well, we'll catch up with them later. That concludes this category. Now, to present the awards for high school jazz, please welcome Mr. Hiiragi."

Ryuumei Academy. That was them, wasn't it?

It was! It was them!

"We won! WE WOONNNN!"

Again there were stares, and again the applause was the only thing keeping her from causing a disturbance - but this time Sawako didn't care. She was in the stratosphere. An honourable mention! For outstanding effort! This wasn't quite a miracle, but she would take it.

"You won, did you?" said Principal Yamada.

Sawako jerked to a halt. Why couldn't she ever see her boss coming? "Y-yes, sir," she said, collecting herself.

"I heard the name Ryuumei, not Sakuragaoka."

"There was a mistake. They had the wrong name for us. It's Ritsu's fault."

"I see," he said.

His face gave nothing away. As nervous as she could ever remember being, Sawako prodded for the verdict. "So isn't that great, sir? The club got an honourable mention!"

"Indeed they did," he replied. "For their song about the virtues of sloth."

In every life, there are moments of decision.

"I gave them a chance to prove themselves capable of hard work and commitment. Their answer was to deny that these things are even necessary."

Sawako had decided to abandon her band. She had left them discouraged and disillusioned. They had overcome it, but only by marshalling those negative feelings and turning them into defiance. Defiance of her - and the duty and authority she represented.

She'd forced them to stand up for themselves. They were supposed to be standing up for the school.

"I... I didn't..."

"My office, Sawako. Immediately after classes end tomorrow. Do not be late."

Sawako could just barely manage to nod.

There was a brief silence broken by the announcer. "In second place... Takizawa Junior High!"

"Hurrah!" said the principal. "My daughter's school did well. I should get some pictures."

He walked away, but then turned back to Sawako. "The reason I know she won is that the name we just heard is the same as the name of her school."

"Right."

"I felt I should explain that in case you found it confusing."

Ritsu was usually very comfortable in her room. She had a certain ratio of stuff on the floor to stuff on the shelves which she did her best to maintain. Her mom always nagged her to clean up, and Mio had come up with some creative descriptions over the years ("it looks like a garbage truck crashed into a bookstore"), but this was how she liked it. Nice clean places made her... tense somehow. Here, she could relax.

Today, though, she felt embarrassed about her room for the first time in a while. It wasn't even because Tsumugi was here; it was Mio. She looked like part of the mess. This wasn't a panic attack or a crying fit - nothing so normal. She was just sitting there hugging her knees on the bed, looking half-alive. Ritsu would gladly have cleaned the room if it would have helped her somehow.

She looked around for something they could talk about. "Hey, you were reading Gunmad GXQ, right? Did you get up to volume 3?"

"I'm not sure. Let me see."

Ritsu tossed the book over to her. Mio flipped through it. "Yeah, I remember this part. Do you have the next one?"

"It's not out yet. The author got, like, the inside-out flu or something."

"Ah."

The silence returned. Ritsu sighed; what could she say? It wasn't like Mio hadn't blown it.

With an unnecessary knock on the door, Tsumugi came in, carrying a teapot in one hand and a stack of cups in the other. Ritsu smiled. Her mom had offered to make tea for them, but the blonde had insisted on doing it. No complaints from the others on that score (Ritsu because she didn't care much about etiquette, Mio because she didn't have the energy).

Tsumugi set everything down and began filling a cup. "This will be yours, Mio," she said.

"Thanks."

Ritsu took a deep sniff. "Mmmm. That sure smells good... wait, we don't keep this kind of tea here."

"These tea leaves were mine," Tsumugi explained. "I happened to have some with me today."

The drummer would normally have been pleased to get more evidence for her "Mugi is capable of making tea at all times" theory, but in this situation she felt like the Tainaka household was being slighted a bit. "We do own basic refreshments, y'know. And ours rarely cause hallucinations in the drinker."

Mio smiled. "That's what this tastes like - the tea that brought Sawa-chan back to life. I'd forgotten all about it." No surprise to Ritsu; with everything they'd been through, that day felt years away.

"This blend is related, but less powerful," Tsumugi confirmed. "And there's no need to exaggerate. I would never serve anything that caused hallucinations."

"I seem to recall Yui seeing God," said Ritsu.

"Who are we to say she didn't?"

"She told us God looked like the KFC guy!"

"Who are we to say he doesn't?"

Ritsu was working on a retort when it hit her - Tsumugi was being silly. That was good. That was a sign of recovery. "Aw, whatever, you pom-pom. Let's get some of that tea already."

The three girls just sat drinking quietly for a little while. It had been a long, long day.

Eventually Ritsu's phone buzzed. It was an unknown number. Popping the phone open, she said, "I don't want any. Unless it's money."

"Wait! Don't hang up!"

"Oh, it's you." Ritsu recognized the voice of the reporter from earlier. "Hey, sorry about this, but I don't think Mio and Mugi are up to chatting right now." (Mio looked puzzled, but Tsumugi nodded in agreement.)

"Really? That's too bad. I guess we'll just use what we have."

"Good luck. Lookin' forward to it."

"Thanks! We'll text you our website address, so check tomorrow. Bye! And congratulations on your special prize!

"Catch ya later," said Ritsu, hanging up.

"Was that one of those reporters we met?" Mio asked. "I could have talked..."

"Nah, better not. Y'know how you're not supposed to put weight on a muscle after you sprain it?"

Mio nodded. "Right."

"What I'm sayin' is, the brain is a muscle."

"Uh huh."

"I recommend head push-ups to strengthen it."

Tsumugi picked up the pot. "More tea, Ricchan?"

"Thanks. S'okay, I got it." She took it and began filling her cup.

"And how does a head push-up work exactly?" Mio asked.

Ritsu just smiled. She didn't answer. Or move.

"Ricchan! Look out!" said Tsumugi. The drummer's cup was full, but she was still pouring. Her friend grabbed the teapot back before it could overflow the saucer.

"You dummy!" said Mio, snapping her fingers in front of Ritsu's face. "What's wrong?"

"One... one sec."

Ritsu picked up her phone. She opened it. She hit redial.

"Hello?"

"WHAT SPECIAL PRIZE?"

The Day After Regionals

Sawako had come to school early every day for weeks. The reason was not industriousness. Tsumugi's gimmick had needed very careful monitoring. The size progression had to be just right: slow enough to pass for weight gain at school, but fast enough to look like pregnancy to the judges at Regionals. Even more important, it had to be tight enough to never slip, but without hurting the person inside. She couldn't let Tsumugi "learn on the job" - it required perfection, and that was Sawako's department.

The original plan had been to reverse the process after Regionals, but that was no longer feasible. Now that Sawako knew Tsumugi's feelings, those one-on-one fitting sessions couldn't possibly continue. Instead, Tsumugi would be taking today and tomorrow off; she would return on Monday, back to normal, and everyone would assume her parents had spent a fortune hiring experts to get her slimmed back down in a hurry.

Despite this, Sawako was once again at school early. The reason was still not industriousness. She was just terrified.

Her plan was to wait by the main entrance, catch the principal early, and see if they could have their meeting right away. As much as she feared the guillotine, lying with her head in the frame waiting for it to drop was worse. And at least she would get out of teaching today's classes.

The arrival of a student broke Sawako's train of thought. Students rarely came in this early, but when she saw who it was, she understood. "Good morning, Azusa."

"M-Ms. Sawako. Good morning." Azusa clearly hadn't been expecting anyone to be here.

"Up bright and early today, eh? Any special reason?"

"Uh... not really. I just like coming in early. It makes me feel..." She paused. "No, that's not true. I do have a reason."

"You don't want to run into Jun."

She nodded quietly.

"You can't put that off for long, you know. You'll see her in class."

"We don't have to talk there."

"But you will eventually. So... do you know what you're going to say?"

She shook her head. "I was up half the night over it, and I still can't decide. I want to strangle her. But... this time yesterday she was my friend. Probably my best friend."

"Don't let Yui hear that. You'll break her heart."

"Oh! No, it's just... I mean, Yui's my senior, it's not really the same --"

"I know." Sawako smiled. Easy to fluster as usual.

"The point is, I'm mad. I don't feel like being the bigger person. But if I'm cold with her now, she'll probably get defensive, and then what? How long does it go on? What if we're never friends again?"

"You're overthinking, Azusa. I'd say you're entitled to be angry for a while. If she's worth making up with, she'll understand that."

Azusa nodded, but still looked unsure. She wasn't done overthinking by a long shot.

Poor kid, thought Sawako. She often found Azusa annoying for much the same reason Ritsu did - she was so serious about everything. It could be stressful being around someone like that. Until now, looking down at her student's tortured face, Sawako had never really understood how tough it was to be someone like that.

"It's going to be okay," the teacher said. It wasn't something she said a lot - she had no proof, after all - but she was starting to realize it was still worth saying.

"Do you really think so?"

"Sure. These things happen."

Azusa looked up, suddenly pleased. "Right! You must know what this is like! How do you deal with it, Teacher?"

"With what?"

"Friends betraying you! It must happen all the --"

Azusa stopped short and slowly turned to meet Sawako's eyes. They had gone from warm to absolute zero.

"I should probably get to class, Teacher," she said.

"You should probably do that," Sawako agreed.

Azusa scurried away.

Some people. Sawako shook her head and turned back to the door. To her surprise, there were already other students arriving. She must have spent longer with Azusa than she'd thought.

Wait... how much longer exactly? Long enough for...?

Sawako dashed upstairs to the teachers' offices. She couldn't have missed the principal coming in, could she? The conversation with Azusa hadn't been that long!

She made it to the office and breathed a huge sigh of relief - no one was there yet. Even so, best to make sure. Sawako unlocked the door and turned on the lights inside. As long as the principal's sign wasn't up yet, she should be okay...

"Thank you," said Principal Yamada, catching the office door before it closed.

"No problem," Sawako replied, still waiting for her eyes to adj- "Ack! You're here!"

"Does that really warrant such shock?"

"Er, no, of course not. Sorry." Sawako jerked her brain back into plan mode. "Sir, I was wondering if you'd mind --"

The principal was staring down. "Really, Sawako? No indoor shoes?"

Sawako reddened. "I didn't have... I mean, I was in a..."

"I prefer not to see my staff tracking mud through the school. It makes it more difficult to set an example for --"

"Sorry! I'll get them! Hang on!"

Sawako ran back into the hallway. She made it about thirty feet before stopping cold, smacking her forehead, and turning around. Naturally, the principal's door was shut, "Do Not Disturb" sign on display. He was already busy filling out paperwork - if nothing else, Principal Yamada's work ethic was unimpeachable.

So much for Plan A. Sawako had a full day in that guillotine frame to look forward to.

She sighed and went to get her indoor shoes. No sense leaving an improperly-dressed corpse.

Sakuragaoka was a fairly upscale high school. It wasn't some sequestered academy with a rigid code of manners, but that didn't mean the students couldn't behave themselves. For instance, the morning arrival period might be noisy, but it was still orderly. Students got their things and proceeded to class without incident.

Usually.

"FREEEEEDDDDOOOOOOMMMM!"

Mio covered her ears. "Owww."

"Oh, I'm sorry, does my freedom pain you?"

Students began gathering to see what the fuss was about. "Ritsu!" said one of them. "Your chair and casts are gone!"

"That's right! I'm FREE!"

A younger girl, looking nervous, asked, "C-can I sign your leg?"

Ritsu gave her a look. "Really not how it works."

"Way to go, Ritsu!" said Yui. "You recuperated like a pro!"

"You too! Look, everybody! Yui can see again!"

A general "Ooooo!" came from the crowd.

"That's right!" said Yui. "It's so great! I feel a solo coming on!"

There were a number of sighs.

"La la la... I can see clearly now! The rain is g--" Yui tripped over someone's backpack.

"Still can't see all obstacles in her way, though," Mio whispered to Ritsu, earning a grin.

Yui got to her feet. "Oww."

"Singing takes too much concentration," Ritsu told her. "Just let it out! FREEDOM!"

"Yeah! Justice!"

"Uh, no. I don't think we're on speaking terms with justice right now. Go with freedom."

"Freedom!"

"All caps! FREEDOM!"

"FREEDOM!"

They began proceeding to class, still chanting. As they went along, other students began joining the parade. Mio rolled her eyes, partly at the spectacle and partly at Ritsu's latest turn of phrase. What was next, "scroll lock"?

"You too, Mio!" said Ritsu. "You're free of those dumb glasses! FREEDOM!"

"No thanks."

"C'mon! FREEDOM!"

Well... she did appreciate being rid of the things. "Freedom."

"FREEDOM!"

Oh, all right. "FREEDOM!"

"Yeah! And Tsumugi's losin' that spare tire as we speak! FREEDOM!"

"FREEDOM!" everyone cheered. Tsumugi was popular; her recent "image change" had been alarming.

"And Sawa-chan's ditching her contacts! FREEDOM!"

"FREEDOM!"

"And now that I'm back on my feet, the janitors don't have to clean those disabled washrooms anymore! Maybe they'll make 'em into supply rooms or something! FREEDOM!"

"FREEDOM!"

"And Yui, you don't need your annoying sister around anymore! FREEDOM!"

"FREE--" Yui stopped. "Hey! Ui isn't annoying!"

"FREEDOM!" shouted another girl enthusiastically. When Yui glared, she sheepishly explained, "The extra chair was in my way a lot."

"Yeah! FREEDOM! And Azusa --"

The non-members stared. "What about her?"

"Yeah. What about her," Mio hissed at Ritsu.

"Uh, Azusa doesn't have to put up with all our problems anymore! FREEDOM!"

That worked for the crowd. "FREEDOM!"

"FREEDOM!"

"FREEDOM!"

"FREE--"

They were at their class door. It was open. Ms. Kawasumi was standing there, looking at the impromptu parade the way the Queen would look at a breakdancing party in her throne room.

"I'm not with them," said Mio, zipping off to her class.

She pays for that later, Ritsu mentally grumbled. She cleared her throat and addressed Ms. Kawasumi. "So. Um... detention, usual time?"

The teacher considered. "Not if you stop now."

There was a collective sigh of relief. Everyone hurried to their seats. Ritsu followed, happy to escape punishment, but slightly glum to have her parade quashed. "We were just celebrating freedom."

"Welcome to life," said Ms. Kawasumi. "You're only as free as you're allowed to be."

Somehow it didn't surprise Ms. Yamasu to find Sawako waiting in the office, staring at the principal's door. "Hi. Still trying to jump ship?"

"Just the opposite. I want to talk him out of firing me."

"What makes you think he'll do that?"

Sawako explained about the Regionals bargain. "It's funny," she concluded. "We actually did win something, but the way we did it may have made everything worse."

"Even so, congratulations," said Yamasu, eyes wide. She couldn't believe Sawako's club had pulled it together, especially after Jun's big betrayal.

...Right. That.

"I owe you an apology," she said with great reluctance; this was not a position she had ever expected to be in relative to Sawako. "I should have put a stop to what Jun was doing."

Sawako waved it off. "You didn't think she was serious. I've been there. These kids are nuts."

"Even so, I should at least have warned you." And why hadn't she, really? Why had the thought never even crossed her mind?

"You can't possibly compete with how badly I screwed up. When your club succeeds, it's not in spite of you."

Yamasu smiled a bit. Nope. If MY kids ever succeed, it'll be in spite of themselves.

"Oh, dammit!" said Sawako.

"What?"

"He's eating his lunch in there. I thought I might be able to catch him on the way out. No such luck."

"Want my advice?"

"Sure."

"Stop trying to get it over with early. You have a little time to prepare. Don't waste it stressing out."

Sawako sighed. "You're right. I always do this."

"I see students do it all the time. It's a hard habit to break."

"I guess I'll go eat." Sawako picked up her bag. "Thanks, Megumi. That was some sound teacherly advice."

Yamasu closed, rolled, and opened her eyes. "I'd rather you called it friendly advice."

Sawako paused; a smile appeared, quickly broadening. "Friendly it is."

She opened the door. On her way through, she turned and asked, "By the way, how's the head?"

"Better," said Yamasu. And she intended to keep it that way. She'd brought two flasks today.

Azusa usually ate lunch in class. Sometimes she ate in the cafeteria for variety. She'd tried the roof a time or two. Wherever Ui and Jun felt like going, she was usually okay with.

There was just one place she made a point of not eating: the music room. Oh, she knew she could if she wanted to - lots of students ate in their clubrooms. Azusa just felt like it would be somehow disrespectful.

Today, respect wasn't such a priority. She was no longer sure this particular club deserved any... and more important, she needed to be alone.

For five minutes, she was. Then -

"Hi! I didn't expect you to be here first."

Azusa looked up at Mio with some surprise. The feeling was mutual. "Hi, senior. Don't you usually eat with the others?"

"Didn't Ritsu tell you? We're meeting here today to read the article!"

"The article?"

"The one we did the interviews for, remember? It's supposed to go up at noon!"

Ah, right. "Did you and Tsumugi get to talk to them?"

"Yeah. They were the ones who gave us the news about our prize! It's so exciting!"

Azusa nodded with all the enthusiasm she could muster. She hoped Mio couldn't tell how little that was.

All along, even if no one else in the band had believed they might win, Azusa really had. Right up until the second last day, she'd kept the faith. Sawako quitting had been rough; Jun's betrayal had been rougher. But she hadn't given up, and for a few shining moments, as they were playing Mio's new song, she'd just known that in spite of everything, her faith was about to be rewarded.

Then Mio fainted, Ritsu cracked a stupid joke, and it was all over.

Azusa felt different today. It was like something inside her had finally given way. One bright autumn day months ago, Azusa had seen a band perform and fallen in love with it at first sight. Since then, despite what they were like in their off hours, she'd fought to keep believing that was the real light music club. Today she didn't feel like fighting anymore.

These people were exactly as they appeared, nothing more or less. Yui wasn't a genius with slacker tendencies, she was a slacker with moments of genius. Ritsu was a competent drummer and an incompetent club president. Tsumugi was a puff of cotton, happy to float wherever the wind took her.

And Mio, whom Azusa had admired the most, was all bark and no bite. She could come through any time except when it really counted. Her will would never be as powerful as her fear.

Azusa felt like a religious believer whose god had missed one prophecy too many. What did she have to show for these months in the club? A lost friend, a fading tan, and half a concert.

Mio seemed happy about the prize, so Azusa wasn't going to rock the boat. But to her, the fact that their lies had been rewarded just made everything worse.

"You all right?" asked Mio.

"Yeah. Sorry."

Mio wasn't fooled. She sat down beside Azusa. "Is this about Jun?"

"Not onl- uh, yeah."

"I'm so sorry that happened. I really thought the others were just being silly, making that bet and all."

"Pssh," said Ritsu, entering the room with Yui. "You had digits 8 and 9."

"Just in case! I didn't think she would really quit. She seemed so sincere..."

"In her flattery, ya mean? Of course you didn't suspect anything - she was buttering you up. To us, that was the most suspicious part. You're good, but you're not super ultra triple-ply good."

Mio glared. "That was not the most suspicious part. What about the tape recorder? The way she ambushed us every morning? The time she took all our fingerprints 'just to have them on file'?"

"And she never actually quit the jazz club! I asked!" Yui chipped in.

Azusa sighed. "Even you could tell, senior?"

"A ninja must see underneath the underneath!" The guitarist held her hands around her eyes like a mask.

"Sorry," Ritsu said. "We really did think you knew."

"So why wasn't I in on the bet?"

"Being corrupt personally is one thing. We drew a line at corrupting the young."

"Ah."

The kettle, which had been getting louder for a while, started boiling. Mio got up to make the tea; Yui immediately stole her seat and started squeezing Azusa. Ritsu smiled. "Easier to find her now that you can see her again, eh?"

Yui rolled her eyes. Apparently the idea that she would ever have trouble locating Azusa was preposterous.

Returning with the teapot, Mio filled everyone's cups. Azusa took a deep breath and immediately felt better. Tsumugi might be the teamaker supreme, but Mio was no slouch. The four girls took their first sips and sank into their chairs in deep satisfaction.

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry about Jun," said Azusa. "I should've known right away what she was doing. She... wasn't who I thought she was."

"S'okay," said Ritsu. "Everybody's entitled to make a few mistakes."

"Thank y--"

"Three, in your case."

"Three?!"

"It was five to start. You used up one with Jun and another when you missed that note yesterday."

"But you --"

Ritsu held up a hand. "Don't even try it. Senior members have more capacity."

"How much exactly?" Yui asked.

"If I tell you, you'll spend it all in one place."

As Yui disputed this, Azusa sat back and just relaxed. For once, she wasn't conflicted about drinking in the clubroom. They deserved a slack day after all they'd been through. But more than that, Azusa was feeling a strange serenity. This day, this togetherness, felt special.

After all... everything felt special when it might be the last time.

There was a knock at the office door. Ms. Yamasu got up and opened it - and had to stifle a laugh. She wasn't surprised at who was there, but... "Jun, you can't possibly tie up hair that short."

She sighed. "How bad does it look?"

"Like you got chewing gum stuck in your hair. Twice."

"Rats." She reached for one of the hair ties to pull it out. "I just... wanted to be back to normal, you know?"

"I understand. You can't force it, though. Messing with your hair won't fix the real problem."

Jun looked to one side.

"I take it you haven't run into the real problem yet."

"I skipped this morning," she said apologetically. "I don't know what to say to her."

As a teacher, Ms. Yamasu couldn't approve of truancy... but she'd seen the state Jun was in last night. If a few missed classes had helped her recover, Yamasu would let it slide. "Just don't miss the afternoon."

"But what do I tell her? She'll be in those classes..."

Wait... in them? "Are you talking about Target Zero here?"

"Azusa. Yeah."

Yamasu frowned. "She's not the 'real problem' I was talking about. You're friends. You can work it out."

"Then who's the real problem?"

"Your teacher! Jun, don't you understand what you did? You sabotaged the club five minutes before stage time! If Mio hadn't shown up, they might not have made it at all!"

"O-oh. Yeah. But..."

"But what?"

"Sawa-chan can't really criticize, can she? She quit too."

Yamasu glared. "First of all, don't call her that. Second, no matter what mistakes she made, it's not your place to judge her. She's your elder, your teacher, and your club advisor."

"But she --"

"No! This is about you. Your mistakes, your duty. Jun, do you know the one thing you did right this month?"

"What?"

"You went around calling me things like Captain. It was kind of annoying, but the principle was right. I was the one in charge of this supposed mission you were on. So you showed me respect... that is, right up until the one time it counted."

Jun turned red, remembering that scream in Ms. Yamasu's ear. "Sorry."

"You may not be a spy or a soldier, but you do have a job. You're a student. Do it right from now on. Obey your superior officers, and let us answer to ours." And to ourselves, thought Yamasu. The memory of Sawako at the bar, drowning in regret and self-loathing, was still fresh.

"So... what do I say to Ms. Sawako, then?"

"An offer of seppuku would be appropriate."

"What?"

"Kidding, kidding." Jun's reaction came as a relief to Yamasu - samurai rituals would've been right up her alley this past month. "Just apologize profusely and accept punishment. I'm sure she'll let you stay in the club after that."

The student was quiet.

"Jun?"

"I... I don't think I want to stay in the light music club," she said, looking a bit bashful. "I think... I want to come back to yours."

Yamasu felt a smile spread across her face. She wondered why. This wasn't really good news, was it? Somehow, though, hearing this annoying student ask to rejoin her terrible jazz club made Yamasu feel happier than she had in ages.

"Okay, Jun. But that doesn't get you out of apologizing to Sawako."

"Right. Thanks, Ms. Yamasu. You're... a really good teacher."

Yamasu was still smiling as Jun left. Her hand, however, was halfway to the flask.

Mio looked at Ritsu. "Well?"

"Well what?"

"Let's see the article!"

"What arti- oh! Right!" The drummer pulled out her phone.

Yui fretted. "I hope they got my good side."

"I don't think they took any pictures," Azusa said. "Anyway, do you even know which side is your good one?"

"Left," she said.

"My left or your left?"

"You have your own left?"

"Got it!" Ritsu interrupted. "I'll send the address around."

All three of the other girls' cell phones buzzed at once. They opened Ritsu's mail and -

"Oh, you're here," said Sawako, closing the door behind her.

Everyone put their phones away immediately. Then they looked at each other, surprised at their common reflex. All four girls had the same thought: I know what I told those interviewers about Sawa-chan, but what did YOU tell them?

"May I?" their teacher asked. Mio and Azusa quickly opened up a space between them. Sawako sat down and poured herself some tea.

"Had that meeting with the principal yet?" Ritsu asked.

She didn't answer; she just leaned back in her chair and let the tea soak through her, easing her stress. It occurred to the others that she hadn't been present for the late-night emergency practice. This was Sawako's first clubroom tea all month. She would probably be in bliss mode until her third cup or so.

Mio whispered to Ritsu, "She's having a rough time. Let's talk about something that won't remind her."

Ritsu nodded. After a moment's thought, she said, "So, anybody heard from Mugi today?"

Sawako's hand shook slightly. A bit of her tea spilled on her shirt.

"Not me," said Yui. "She slept over with you, right?"

"Yeah, but she was already gone when we woke up. Quite the early riser, our Mugi."

"It was a bit rude," Mio said. "I mean, she thanked Ritsu's parents and all, but she could at least have woken us to say goodbye."

"Guess she's still upset," said Yui.

Mio traded a look with Ritsu. "You noticed that too?"

"Yeah. Mugi usually smiles all the time. Yesterday she only did it when we were looking."

Ritsu nodded. "Good eye. But wait, if she smiled when we were looking, how did you... oh, right." Yui was holding her hands around her eyes in circles, reminding Ritsu that she'd been wearing dark glasses. Behind those lenses, she could look in any direction unnoticed.

"Didn't that gesture mean a ninja mask earlier?" asked Azusa.

"It's in disguise now," Yui explained.

Sawako set down her glass and sighed. "I can't believe I forgot."

"Forgot what?" asked Mio.

"There's somewhere I need to be. Thanks for the tea, girls. I needed it." She got up to go.

"Wait! You didn't tell us about --"

"Haven't had the meeting yet. It'll be after school. I'll come here afterward."

Ritsu nodded. "We'll be here, Sawa-chan. Good luck."

The teacher nodded back and headed out. There was general tension among those left behind.

"Whattaya think'll happen?" Ritsu asked.

"What else can happen?" said Azusa. "She failed. She had to lead us to a win and we lost."

"We let her down," said Mio sadly.

"Oh, like it's our fault!" Ritsu protested. "We tried our butts off!"

"At the wrong things," said Azusa. "We put all our effort into the gimmicks and neglected the thing that actually mattered: our performance."

"But the gimmicks were Sawa-chan's idea! She insisted!"

"I don't think she realized how much they would distract us," Mio said.

"And we didn't have to let them!" added Azusa. She was sick to death of everyone, even Mio, dodging responsibility. "We overdid it! You taking those glasses so seriously, Yui acting like she really was blind half the time..."

Ritsu calmly said, "I have a nuke, Nakano. Don't make me use it."

"Like you can talk! You were the worst one! Your 'stealth game', your solos and detentions... and hey, when are we gonna hear why we really had to wear another school's name tags, huh? What happened to that school's real band? Did they miss out just so we could humiliate ourse--"

"The biggest distraction was Jun," said Ritsu.

Azusa's mouth closed.

"She kept us dancing around all month. And she was your friend. She joined to mess with you. That big wrench in the engine cut our chances in half. You're the most to blame, and you know it."

"Ritsu..." said Mio.

"I warned her. Now she can deal. She's got no room to criticize."

Azusa finally found her tongue. "W-well, fine! So what? I don't have to be perfect to call this club out!"

"Oh, you still here?"

"YES! Yes I am! But you know what? Maybe it's time I --"

The bell rang. Mio and Yui quickly started packing up their lunches; they nudged Ritsu and Azusa respectively to do the same. Reluctantly, they broke off their fight to get ready for class.

"We'll meet here again right after school," said Mio. "Oh, the article! Nobody read it until then!"

"I wasn't supposed to read it?" said Yui - quickly followed by "Just kidding!" when Mio shot her a glare.

Azusa took off, as did Mio. As the other two headed for class at their usual relaxed pace, Ritsu muttered to Yui, "God, what a twerp."

"That's mean. Azu-nyan's right about all those things."

Ritsu sighed. "I know. I think I'd like her better if she were full of crap once in a while."

Yamasu had assumed she could hide her flask fast enough to fool anyone who came in. She was wrong by about half a second.

"Alcohol? Really?" said Kawasumi. "I told you, with all that aspirin you took --"

"Took. Past tense." Yamasu wiped her mouth. "It's not in my system anymore."

"How can you be sure?"

"Have you ever taken a whole handful of aspirin? I did some extra-strength throwing up later. Trust me, my system was empty after that."

The other teacher sighed. "Well, it's your body. Don't say I didn't warn you."

Since her cover was blown, Yamasu took the flask back out and had another swig. When Kawasumi did a bad job of hiding her distaste, she reminded her, "I seem to recall catching you in the smoking zone yesterday."

"Megumi, why do you need that stuff so much?"

"The job. The kids. The noise."

"So why don't you get some other job?"

Yamasu leaned on one hand and smiled bemusedly. "Would you believe this is all I ever wanted to do?"

"Really?"

"Yep. Teaching the next generation of musicians... it was my dream. I just had no idea the next generation of musicians was so terrible."

"Well, they're only in high school..."

She shrugged. "That's when I discovered music. I wanted to help others do the same. I guess it didn't occur to me that lots of people get interested, but the real talents are like needles in a haystack. You have to dig through a lot of horse manure to get to them."

"But you stay."

"It's a steady paycheck - safer than performing. I'm used to it." She raised her flask as if in a toast. "Living the dream, baby."

For a minute or so, Kawasumi just stood there thinking.

"Something on your mind, huh? Want to talk about it?"

The other teacher gave her a plaintive, almost pathetic look.

" 'No' is an option," Yamasu clarified.

Kawasumi let out a breath. "Thank you. Nothing personal."

Yamasu smiled. This was something personal - but not about her. It had taken her a while to notice that Kawasumi was a very private person, but from now on she was going to respect that.

The other teacher walked over to the principal's door and knocked. He waved her in; then she noticed the sign. "Oh! Sorry, sir, I won't --"

"Quite all right. Have a seat."

"But if you don't want to be disturbed..."

He smiled. "I've decided to use the sign as a test of will."

Sawako shook her head. What had possessed her to think she had the afternoon off? She hadn't checked on Tsumugi since they'd all gone home last night. The girl's mental state was fragile right now - she needed monitoring. Forcing herself through Regionals right after a crushing rejection was going to have consequences.

A certain irony about that last observation occurred to Sawako, but her case was different. She was an adult, responsible for her own mistakes. She could push herself through one more day.

The start-of-class bell was ringing as Sawako went out the front door. She headed for her ca-

"WAIT!"

Hm?

"Sawa-cha- I mean, Target Pri- I mean, Ms. Sawako! Wait!"

She turned around, but saw no one there... until she looked down. Jun was in a pose of abject supplication. She was face-down, with her knees folded under her and her arms stretched out in front. And in her cupped hands... "What's that?"

"All my money. Please accept it in restitution."

Sawako sighed. "Get up, Jun."

"But I --"

"Quickly. And put that pouch away before someone robs you."

The bassist picked herself up and pocketed her money. "Are you sure?"

"More than sure. I'd be breaking a lot of rules if I took that."

Jun blushed to realize she had technically been trying to get Sawako in even more trouble. "Sorry!"

"Forget i--"

"For all of it!" She started bowing over and over. "The whole thing! Sorry sorry sorry! I never meant to hurt anyone!"

Sawako's eyes widened. "You're about to hurt yourself. Stop that before your brain gets scrambled."

"Sorry!" Jun straightened up.

"So, uh..."

She tensed, awaiting her punishment.

"Well, you did something pretty awful, Jun. So I'll have to... um..."

Who am I to come down on her for this? I was hardly a saint this month. I mean, I just left the girls to their fate. What's worse, abandonment or acts of sabotage?

...No, wait, acts of sabotage are a lot worse. But even so, I was their teacher. She was just a... friend and colleague... who was best friends with one of them...

Okay, but still, she's just a dumb kid. Too dumb to know that... um, betrayal is wrong? But I... I can't judge... even if she IS one of my students and a member of my -

"Oh, forget it. You can wash my car at lunch for the next two weeks."

"Got it! I'll start now!"

"No, you'll go to class now. But there's somewhere else you should go after school."

"Yes?"

"The music room."

She looked away. "I don't think I should stay in the clu--"

"Oh, you're not staying. I didn't say you could, did I? Traitors do not get tenure and pensions."

The corners of Jun's mouth rose just a little, and Sawako knew she had guessed right: she wanted to go back to the jazz club. After what she'd done, she couldn't show her face in the light music club again, even if everyone forgave her. But in her own club, she could still get things right.

That said... "I pointed it out because I'm not the only one you have to apologize to. You should seize the opportunity."

"Right! Sorry again! And thank you!"

She ran for the school door. Sawako called after her, "One more thing, Jun."

"Yeah?"

"Do not offer Ritsu the money."

Mio's math teacher had sent her to the office to pick up a folder he'd left behind. She was happy enough to help... though if she were more like Ritsu, she would consider him still on thin ice for that train question on the test. If she were more like Ritsu.

She knocked; a teacher got the door. It was Ms. Yamasu, who had taught one of Mio's classes last year. "Hi, Mio," she said. "What do you need?"

She explained, and the teacher let her in. Unfortunately, the file cabinet where the folder was supposed to be was locked. "Do you have the key?" Mio asked.

"Yep. I'll have to find it, though. Mind if I go to the bathroom first? You know how it is... liquid in, liquid out."

Mio liked Ms. Yamasu - most of her students did - but every once in a while she provided way too much information. It tended to coincide with those occasions when she seemed a bit unsteady on her feet.

As she was leaving, a cellphone on a nearby desk went off. "That's been happening for hours," Ms. Yamasu said, wincing. "Can you make it stop? I can barely work my own phone."

"I'll try," said Mio, who could also barely work her own phone, but wasn't about to refuse a teacher's request.

Ms. Yamasu left. The noise from the phone stopped; Mio carefully picked it up. At arm's length, she opened it and looked for the volume setting...

...only for it to go off again. Acting on pure reflex, Mio pressed Talk. Then she froze, realizing what she'd done. Was it too late to -

"Hello? Sawako?"

Uh oh.

"Are you there? You finally picked up, so come on, let's talk."

Trembling, Mio raised the phone to her ear. "S-sorry. Ms., um, Yamako... I mean, Sawanaka... Sawa-chan isn't here!"

" 'Sawa-chan'?"

The caller's baffled reaction reminded Mio that she wasn't supposed to use that nickname with other adults. "Ms. Sawako. She isn't here."

"What? Then who are you?"

"I'm not her."

"...I gathered that. Who ARE you?"

How did this become about Mio? "That's personal! In fact - who are you, huh? Huh?"

"It's Tetsuo. Now who's this? You must know Sawako if you're answering her phone, right?"

Whew. Now that the caller was identified, Mio found herself suddenly calmer. She was no longer fending off some random stranger who might track her down and mug her. At least now she knew -

Wait. She did know. She knew all too much about this person.

"This is Mio," she said. "From the light music club. We met once."

"Mio... the, uh, tall one, right?"

Somehow Mio doubted that was the main thing Tetsuo had noticed about her. "Right. We had our big competition yesterday. I'm sure Sawa-chan mentioned it..."

"Of course. How did you do?"

"She quit in our second last practice. Over you. Then she nearly drank herself to death. Over you."

"...Oh."

"She told us what you're really like. We know you're not rich and you rejected her harshly."

"Come on! She PROPOSED! It was crazy!"

"It was love. She put her whole heart on the line, and you... you just... how dare you call her now?"

"To apologize! I want to make things right!"

That surprised Mio a bit. "I thought you were done with --"

"No! Listen, Mio, I... I screwed up.

She raised an eyebrow. He actually sounded sincere.

"I did some stupid, awful things. I know that. I've got to get her to listen and give me a second chance. Your teacher is someone really special. I don't want to lose her."

"Well..."

"Haven't you ever made a big mistake before? Messed things up with someone important to you?"

"...Yes..." All too many times, she had to admit to herself.

"So listen... Sawako won't hear me out, but she'll hear you. Can you please put in a good word for me? Just tell her how sorry I am. Please!"

Mio thought carefully.

Right now, Tetsuo didn't sound like the unrepentant user Sawako had described. It was certainly possible that he wanted to change - that he'd just been caught off-guard by the proposal and reacted badly. Mio could relate to that (as little as she wanted to) and she did believe in second chances. But how could she possibly help him after all he'd put Sawako through?

She had to find out if it was worth it. Mio didn't know a whole lot about adult relationships, and what she did know terrified her - but she wasn't a child either. She knew one day, not so far off, she would be as close to a man as Sawako had been to Tetsuo. She would want to... do things with him.

And she knew that day would absolutely not come unless something else came first.

"Mr. Tsukamoto," she said, "suppose I offered to tell Sawa-chan one more thing besides your apology. Just one thing. What would you want me to tell her?"

"H-huh?"

"Just the first thing that comes into your head when you picture talking to her again. What is it?"

"Uh... I'm really sorry for --"

"Besides the apology. In fact, forget the apology. Suppose this is the only thing you can say to try and get through to her. It's your one and only chance. What do you tell her?"

"I... I... I really like you, Sawako! I think we were great together!"

Mio sadly shook her head, though she knew he couldn't see her. "I'm sorry, Mr. Tsukamoto. That was the wrong answer."

"Oh, love, right? It had to be love? Come on! That's what I meant to say!"

"I don't believe you. If you loved her, I wouldn't even have had to ask. You would have told me to give her that message before anything else."

"It was a trick question! Gimme a break! You've gotta tell her I've changed!

"I hope you have, sir. I wish you the best. But stay away from Sawa-chan."

"Wait! I --"

Mio hung up. Then she found the menu button (on the third try), found where it said 'Block Number', and selected it. She put the phone back on the desk, confident that it wouldn't be going off and bothering Ms. Yamasu again.

When Mio had said "Sawa-chan", Tetsuo had clearly been startled. And yes, Mio knew she really should call her Ms. Sawako. Ms. Yamanaka would be even more appropriate. Or Ma'am. Teacher. Miss. But she hadn't done that in a long time, and neither did the other club members.

They called her Sawa-chan. Like "Mugi". Like "Ricchan". Like "Azu-nyan".

It wasn't about disrespect - well, it was, but not exclusively. Sawako was less than their teacher, but she was more than that too. She was one of them.

And they would protect her.