i don't really feel like going back to school Thursday. I'm so emotional about it. I don't think I'm ready to put up with new rumors from Connor and getting constantly teased about it.
I mean yeah, I'm really excited about seeing the boys and white-snow-geek
but yeah... I'm still yes and no with this school. It's cool that it lets you express individuality //casually walks into a school looking like a goth// and it also has one of the best school music programs, but it has its disadvantages.
i think I'm more worried about seeing Connor. Now that we're in a class together... even worse that it's music so i might be forced to do shit with him because no one like him. I don't even know anyone else apart from him in music with me. FUCK. i better not be with Jhya or them. that'll destroy me having to put up with him again. Nathan's the only good person in that band... i swear to god. I dunno how they're so popular. He brought me so low. Said that one of my closest friends was a drugo and is a slut (which i'll admit, she was) but there were a few things he said that hurt me emotionally. He said i was an emotional wreck and destroyed me. I swear he was the one who went and told the coordinators about my self harm and made me see the Councillor... she was nice... but i don't like talking about my issues with others unless they're my close friends.
I didn't get the one subject i wanted to study at high school which was earth and stars. Ended up getting 3 fucking PE subjects instead. that's like... 6-8 PE sessions a week and i really hate PE XD
ugh, now that Connor's "girlfriend" isn't with him anymore he's gonna be hanging off of me even though i told him to fuck off. Ever had that one person who's like a fly and won't leave you alone? well that's him. No matter how hard i try, i can't get rid of the fucker. I can't deal with being his "girlfriend" again. I don't want to be bullied. I don't want him trying to cuddle and hold my hand. He hates the LGBT community and can't stand Rob. Thinks he's fake and i should be with him instead. But... he's really creepy... keeps asking me if I am comfortable with sex and why i don't want children. wanted to take a condom from the boys (my friends). we had health and did a quiz they just took them so they could use them as water balloons but yeah... he's creepy. I don't like him. i hate him. i really hate him.
okay. done with that rant.
I just played my instruments for 4 hours straight and now my voice is hurting, my fingers are bleeding and grey. Lol. I think I'm done for tonight. Now I'm just chilling listening to Nirvana.. and drawing. wanna see what i got?
drawing Amethyst and Fae. the 2 devils. okay... thanks for reading this really long status.