look guys, i am so sorry i have caused you all grief with my fucking depression and bitchiness. i know i haven't been the greatest friend lately at all... I've been so fucked up with life at the moment. I have to speak in front of my class tomorrow and i get ridiculously nervous when i am talking, even if it's to people i know. The only time I am not nervous is when i am playing music or audio calling people. I am having family issues and my parents are basically telling me i am "imperfect." They are always yelling at me for bad grades in maths and english. This is what they said to me the other day.
mum: "I am picking you up early from school tomorrow because we're going to the holiday house, do you know what subject you have in the last period?"
me: "yeah, i think i have maths..."
mum: "oh... i think i might have to leave you at school. Your attendance level is extremely low for that class. I want you to study maths for 2 hours the moment we get home everyday from school, i might get you a maths tutor if your struggling."
me: 2 hours... yeah... not like i have anything else to do...
She has also been giving me random cooking lessons and you guys know I HATE cooking. Some of you may have read the status before about how she called me "a musician living on the streets, with no family, food or home. you'll be earning as much as $5 a day because no one will like your music." FUCK IT. i think i have a good chance at love, excuse me. I have a boyfriend.
My dad told me off for trying to make him happy and i accidentally stood in front of the TV. He's always glued to the TV, never takes his eyes off it.... he doesn't even notice me anymore.
My little sister has been coming home from school telling me my friends are stupid and ugly. She's a popular kid by the way, her friends are not very good for her.... she has turned into a bitch.
I have been yelled at by teachers that i am failing and have caught me drawing in class, even if it's a picture based on my depression. I actually swore at a teacher the other day. i said "i don't give a shit about school anymore." He just gave me a nasty look and walked off.
I told Lydia that i didn't want to practice this thing tomorrow and that i had promised Rob a few things today and might not have much time.
I made Eve upset... I-I really didn't mean to...
and yeah... i dunno... i just feel like such a mistake to everyone and everything. The only person who seems to make me feel loved and worth living is gamersphotography
and i don't even know him in real life. Guys tell me the truth, do you think i am a mistake?