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About Deviant Llama Donor™ paints with wordsUnited States Groups :iconinsecure-writers: Insecure-Writers
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Literature
the spherical hearse
catch a star, far, far and drifting-
astronauts astray in planets and dust,
no names to follow or directions to catch, you
hold a galaxy, far, far and drifting-
a dream so close, so distanced in fog,
its darkness outruns you- reach for it still, you
die in silence, far, far and drifting-
detached, unmatched, your frozen face, a warm tear
dripping up into the vacuum, you
live out eternity, far, far and drifting-
astral planes and echoed faces, stars of yellowed frames,
lined pink-blue and cut with static-
empty words, thoughtless sights
a loud quiet
and a long second.
you float.
:iconkrpapadakis:krpapadakis
:iconkrpapadakis:krpapadakis 2 12
Photo of Permutation 28 by monochromeandminimal Photo of Permutation 28 :iconmonochromeandminimal:monochromeandminimal 24 2
Literature
lxiii.
And it's not how I start my sentences midway
or how I repeat my point over and over
It's not when I have nothing more to say
nor when I have too much to confess
None of these things will amount to my insecurities
All the marks on my legs or evolution on my skin
maybe the size of my breast or my whole stature
maybe it's in the pitch of my voice
which make me sound like I'm 9
but maybe it's in the way I forgot how to smile
and forgot how to be a girl
so I put on dark clothes
loose shirts and leggings
I offer the fattest lie on the table
and sell to everyone that 'I'm okay'
I would try to negotiate that we don't need to be friends
and that you should just stand there and never come near me
I would sit them down and look them in the eye
"I am not good for you."
and
"You can't make me be."
and
"Shut up."
and
"I'm sorry."
and
I already said that it's not in the way I put things to words
Because I admit that I have a lot to say
but please don't believe me because they'll just
:iconvvinter-flowers:vvinter-flowers
:iconvvinter-flowers:vvinter-flowers 14 8
Literature
change of heart
Every heart is hard wired with sweeping generalizations of love
it is neither idiocy or ignorance but human nature
we may aim be logical, to choose the best answer
but it is still our very own teary eyes that smudge the truth till the lines blur into gloomy clouds that tail after us
at this point logic becomes a foreign language and it becomes much easier to burry our restless heads into pillows than rationalize with our hearts.
our sense of self dissolves into rivers of doubt but it is through this process of destruction that we recreate ourselves.
Do not forgot to remind yourself that pain is a sign of health too.
Do not forget that in order for seeds to grow, we must break open ourselves.
:iconvvinter-flowers:vvinter-flowers
:iconvvinter-flowers:vvinter-flowers 19 7
❧ ❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ :constructive: by a-kid-at-heart Constructivecomment by Amarantheans :Constructive: by stuck-in-suburbia Supportcomment by Amarantheans❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧

You inspire me to aspire to be the very best me I can possibly be. Thank you for being you and for bringing out the best in me.

Me encanta tu forma de ser; no hay nadie como tú. You are my treasure trove; eres tan importante para mi.

Like my current avatar/icon? It was commissioned by the amazing copper9lives and made by the awesome RoslynnSommers. :love:

Like my author/literature tag? It was made by the effusively generous and astoundingly multitalented copper9lives. (Someone worth knowing.) :rose:

Critiques


So life-like. I have always liked realistic-meets-cartoony artwork. I think you did an amazing job on this. In fact, it is definitely o...


first of all, this is my first ever critique and i hope it's helpful. i generally stay away from critiques because i don't feel like i'...

An outstanding critique is clear, concise, and constructive. I aspire to give such critiques.

Groups

Commissions

Mosaic Menagerie
Should you feel adventurous enough to commission me, I can be commissioned to make the following:
-deviantART IDs
-logograms
-literature tags
-traditional or digital art
-literature (poetry or prose)
Prices are negotiable and start from 20 :points:. For more examples, please browse through my gallery or note me. Thank you!

Donate

cholie has started a donation pool!
576 / 100,000,000
Miscellaneous Goal - I plan on collecting points so that I can support the lovely dA community by:

1] donating as prizes during contests
2] purchasing subscriptions
3] commissioning art


:thanks::iconthanksplz::iconthankyouplz:

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deviantID

cholie
Llama Donor™ paints with words
United States
[cho-lee]
©holie™

(someday i'll be enough)
//please leave me a message & i'll get back to you when i'm less like myself.//
[[soon the person you got to know when you met me will be but a distant memory.]]

WARNING: This deviant has the tendency to gush on and on about the amazing people in her life so if that's not your cup of tea, please don't ask her about them.

"M'dear, you are my kind of quirky." ❤ ❤ ❤

:megaphone: vvinter-flowers is wonderfully brilliant. ♥ ♥ ♥

"perpetually missing you..." ❥ ❥ ❥
"g(r)asping for words..."

"Age? My dear, age, is but a number."
"And she, she is no stranger to heartache."

Hoping, striving to one day get here: "I'm not afraid of people seeing me. I think it's about knowing that only the worthy can see you. Therefore it's not scary, it's comforting." -kiwi-damnation

On getting over writer's block someone once advised me to: "write what you think, write what you feel, write what you know." I think this will always be relevant so I thought I'd share it with you all.

"Sunrises and sunsets shared
in your company are the sweetest."

❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧❦ ❧

*is the convergence of eclectic and eccentric*
*misses you to the moon and back*
*wonders how and why you're still here*
*is a blanket burrito*
*is a courier*
*is a bridge*

((some of the best things in life e v e r are often the simplest and smallest like when you can hear the smile in another person's voice, or when you're enjoying the rhythmic inhalations and exhalations of someone close to your heart. these, these are things worth your time, effort, energy, existence to l i v e for. <3))

[[i'm aspiring to be the change i wish to see in the world. i may be only one person, but i dare to have the audacity to believe that whatever i do, no matter how small, has the power to make a difference. so stand with me and together we can make the world a better place. let's sow seeds of love everywhere.]]
:teamwork:

writing keeps me sane, it is my lifeline
in the same way, i have an innate need to create

[aspire to inspire]

nothing special
just plain old me
what you see is what you get
perceive me as you wish
i will always, forever,
and only ever
be me


if ever you need or want
someone to just listen
or keep you company
through the night
please don't hesitate to ask
_______________________________________________________________


:llama: Want a llama? Ask and you shall receive! :llama:

:bulletred:cholie is willing to give you a llama for:

~:bulletorange:free = nothing
~:bulletyellow:a llama = x1 llama for you and cholie
~:bulletgreen:points = :points: x1 [or however many you see fit] for cholie

~:bulletblue:Note: If you've given me a llama and haven't received one in return, please let me know, thank you!
~:bulletpurple:Thank you for the llama and thank you for the point[s]!
~:bulletpink:If you give me a llama, you will get one too.
~:bulletblack:If you want to trade with me, please note me, so that I can get you your llama as soon as possible.

:llama: Want a llama? You've come to the right place. :llama:
Llama Motto: There's no such thing as too many llamas.

[.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.]

I am (known as)--
Chloë Williams (a pseudonym/pen name/alter ego)
Ocho
Cho
Chocolite
Chili
Cho Cho
Cho Cho Train
Cho-chan
Choles
Cholesberry
Dulzura
the crazy Lady C
the silly Miss C
Pleasantly Quirky
Strangely Sentimental
Incoherent Goop, "Ig" or I.G. for short, Goop, Goopy, or any other variation
Choliekins
Choliemink
Minkie
Creatureling (from Outer Space)
Girl with Many Names
Miss Poetry Veins
Cholie Monster
etcetera, etcetera
or simply Cholie
take your pick

(poetry flows in my veins, bro! might as well call me poetryveins.)

[.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.]

Thank you so very much for your support
all of your comments and favorites mean so much to me
I am so grateful for each of you
Thank you for bestowing your friendship upon me
it is such an honor and privilege to know you

[.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.∞.]

and through it all--
my hand i offer
to you in friendship
i care about you
and i always will


just like that,
she is
g o n e .
it is her way
of saying,
" g o o d b y e , "
i n d e f i n i t e l y . . .

i n n a t e l y i n f i n i t e l y
drawn to you; i am undone.

Her innocence oft was met with animosity,
hostility, irreverence, and doubt. Shortly
thereafter, she learned to better hide away
the quintessence of herself, so that she
could be a wallflower...naught ever to draw
the attention or focus of others...finding
comfort, contentment, and solace in
flying under the radar, fashioning
nondescript into her armor and attire.

And when you come to mind,
her heart overflows with such
tender ferocity; so much so
that she is calm as can be
even though she knows
her fondness of you
is the quiet before
the storm.

"What great joy and honor it is to be your friend;
eternity simply is not long enough."

this is the end before the beginning
the goodbye before the hello
the farewell before the greeting
au revoir, adieu, hasta que me
quieres ver

she's drowning,
tossed about,
dragged into
great depths by
the undertows-
(though she's
landlocked.)

she was on the ledge
of anguish and hopelessness
and she would have leapt into
nothingness had you not chosen
to stick around for her.


_______________________________________________________________


Current Residence: Your Heart
♡⇆♥

"this is a love revolution;
let's transform the way we love."


✽ ✾ ✿ ❁ ❃ ❋ ❀ ✽ ✾ ✿ ❁ ❃ ❋ ❀ ✽ ✾ ✿ ❁ ❃ ❋ ❀ ✽ ✾ ✿ ❁ ❃ ❋ ❀ ✽ ✾ ✿ ❁ ❃ ❋ ❀

COMMISSION YOU ⇆ ME, note me for more information.
Interests
The dust bunnies are rioting and stampeding. I'm still missing you.

So, I was tagged here: tag! never stop running!Cactuarby the incredible & incomparable PatchworkLynx.
I thought I'd increase my presence on here, even if bit by teeny bit. Here goes nothing (or everything)...

Pixel Cactus Ani Pixel Cactus Ani Pixel Cactus Ani 

1. What color do you feel connected to? quite a few colors, really. i'll just choose two: the color that's equal parts blue and purple (the one that people can't agree if it's more blue or purple), and periwinkle.

2. Do you believe in higher powers? *nods* i do.

3. How easily do you forgive? i think so. i've realized that just because you've forgiven someone doesn't mean you're not still healing, which is more than okay and it's not a sign that you haven't forgiven them.

4. Beach or forest? hmm, if i had to choose, i'd choose forest.

5. Favorite color to wear? mmm, well, i've quite a bit of black, blue, purple, red. i've been intentionally trying to add more varieties of colors into my wardrobe.

6. A song with a good memory attached to it? the "Ghostbusters" theme song because i sang it karaoke style with my friend Louis. i was super nervous but i still had fun. it was just a great time of being in great company and it still makes me nostalgic and smile when it comes to mind.

7. A song with a bad memory? i don't really have any songs that are attached to bad memories for me because i've made it a point to make new memories around those songs so they'd bring joy to me again, rather than pain.

8. Do you feel like you fit in? hahaha, i've never felt like i've fit in. not even in my own immediate family. there are the few and far in between people who i feel i fit with, if that make sense.

9. Would you rather be in school or have summer break be longer? hmm, well, since i've been out of school for quite a spell now, i wish summer break was longer for the sake of my friends who're still in school.

10. Are you a secretive person? i'm actually a peculiarly private person, but in many contexts i don't come off as such. i think it has something to do with the fact that if i were a candy, i'd be an everlasting gobstopper with a chewy center, and if i were a vegetable, i'd be an onion...you get the gist... 

11. One place you would love to visit? goodness me, there are so many! but if you give me no choice but to choose, i'd say Italy, because AlwaysRainCheck hails from there.

12. Ferns or succulents? ugh, what's with all this "either or" business?! can you stop making me choose? i'm going to say both because they're awesome.

13. An unpopular opinion? i think doctors should always prescribe treatments/medication/supplements they believe are the safest and most effective for their patients, rather than the most profitable, because a lot of medication have severe side-effects there are extremely detrimental to the body. 

14. One thing that has changed your perspective on life? listening and learning with an opened heart.

15. What is one thing you used to regret but don’t anymore? hm, i used to profoundly regret losing contact with people, but i learned that some people are just meant to stay in your life for a season or two, whereas, others are meant to stick around.

16. Believe in true love? mhm, and it's not confined by "romantic" love, for lack of a better term.

17. Disney or Pixar? Pixar

18. One thing you wish you could change? the -isms: racism, sexism, ageism, etcetera... i guess it all boils down to how many feel entitled to be narrow-minded/hateful/judgmental/etc because it's convenient.   

19. One thing you hope stays the same? i've a few close loved-ones and i hope we remain close.

20. Would you change the past if you could? i wouldn't change my past. i am who i am, i am where i am because i experienced everything i went through, no matter how joyous or excruciating. it has enhanced my abilities to understand, relate, and empathize with people...something all the money in the world could never buy.

21. Do people say you’re too hard on yourself? *nods* i'm not the most gentle person towards myself.

22. Are you trendy? haha, nah, sometimes i intentionally wear things that clash because i can.

23. Favorite type of fashion? mm, steampunk/Victorian (especially menswear from the Victorian era)

24. If you could have one power what would it be? teleportation with the ability to not adversely affect the time-space continuum

25. Do you believe in second chances? *nods* But if they abuse the second chance, they can't keep getting more chances because it'd be enabling them.

26. Do you worry about being forgotten? strangely enough, no, i don't worry about being forgotten. quite frankly, i'm actually perpetually (half) expecting it to happen, so when it doesn't, i'm always surprised.

27. Are you looking for a relationship? no, i am not. if it happens, it happens. it'll happen in time and if it doesn't, maybe it wasn't meant to happen. no harm, no foul.

28. What is one thing you dislike about yourself? i'm my own worst enemy most of the time. before i've even given myself a chance, i've already defeated myself.

29. What is one thing you love about yourself? i'm decent at understanding others.

30. Do you have a secret account on any form of social media? none of my accounts are 100% secret.

31. Favorite season / weather? spring and autumn and the weather during these seasons.

32. Do you listen to sounds to fall asleep? i haven't in a long time, i probably should start again.

33. Do you bottle up emotions? i'm still unlearning this. it's a work in progress.

34. Do you have a journal to write in when you’re upset? i've been putting it off, but probably shouldn't. then again, i can't exactly afford to unpack all of this right now. perhaps, i'll save it for NaPoWriMo, perhaps i won't.

35. Do you have a crush right now? not exactly.

36. What do you find attractive? um, shiny things, when people smile with their whole being, when people's eyes light up when they're excited about something, when people talk about their dreams/aspirations/endeavors, when people dare to dream big, etcetera. (i feel like i didn't answer this question the way it was intended, oh well. *shrugs*)

37. One thing you used to hate but now love? the color pink, not in nature, but in clothing/accessories/human-made things. i mean i wouldn't say i love it now, but i'm at a place where i like it and am indifferent towards it so much so that i'll actually don pink clothing now.

38. Do you have a stronger connection with your family or friends? friends, i've always felt more at ease around them than my family and it's still this way to this day. i'm making progress with my family, which is awesome, but there's still a difference in closeness.

39. Are you future orientated? i'm learning to live in the moment and be future orientated. 

40. One thing you’re worried about in the future? honestly? the condition the environment is in. there've been so many warning signs throughout history and some have been heeded and addressed, but most have yet to be heeded and addressed.

41. What do you do when you’re bored? lol, i'm actually rarely ever bored. if i am, it's a sign that i'm burned out/listless/restless/disquiet/depressed.

42. Mermaids or angels? they're both fascinating.

43. Favorite song? too many, however, Susie Suh's music really resonates with me.

44. What are you anxious about right now? the/my future, whether or not i'll "make it" someday, etcetera.

45. If you had to choose one dream job one right now, no matter how crazy, what would it be? a world-class/professional cartographer.

46. Do you believe in karma? not exactly, but i do believe that everyone will get what they deserve in due time; what goes around comes around.

47. Do you want revenge or peace? peace, revenge only begets revenge and it's an unending negative loop.

48. Do you like Pokémon? If so what’s your favorite Pokémon? *nods* i don't really know which is my favorite anymore. XD back in the day, it used to be Mew.

49. Would you rather be a youtuber or a streamer? PatchworkLynx's answer: "mmm a youtuber who sometimes does livestreams but mainly posts videos because i do like the ability to edit and retake." but i don't know how to play the piano, so i think i'd try voice-acting, reading/performing poetry, interviewing poets/authors (specifically up & coming), etcetera.

50. Do you think about alternate universes? why, yes, i do.

51. One thing that you love about your friends? PatchworkLynx's answer is also mine: "how good their souls are."

52. Are you scared of love? i'm currently still unlearning this fear.

53. How long was your longest phone call? it was a lifetime ago. and regular all-nighters happened because we were still talking.

54. Do you believe in soulmates? (Platonic ones too) yes, i also believe in kindred souls.

55. One thing you’re worried people will make fun of you about? pretty much everything. let's just say, growing up, i've been teased and people have highlighted the most particular things they've "noticed" about me. i've felt like i was a specimen on a petri dish for extended periods of times throughout my life and it's still the case. i guess it feels like the whole world is watching/waiting for me to screw up so they can go out of their way to point it out to me.

Comments


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(1 Reply)
:icontheendomega:
THEendOmega Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2019  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for adding "Gary" to your favorites. It was a harrowing thing and I'm grateful that you appreciated it! -TeO
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(1 Reply)
:iconcyre:
cyre Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2018
Mew. I wonder if you're still around.
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(1 Reply)
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