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MAN, sometimes I want to head butt my computer screen and hope that the idiot on the other side feels it.


There is a whole lot of RUBBER DUCK coming, so if you don't like to see the word rubber duck often, you should go ahead and click the rubber ducking back arrow before this rubber ducking rubber ducker rubber ducks it's way into a rant of EPIC rubber ducking proportions.



What the hell is with all the "Why does this deserve a DD?" "This is crap, DD my ass." "Goes to show you how far DA will sink." "Oh, fan art, HOW ORIGINAL!" "This uses a base, that makes it shit IMHO"

You know what.


RUBBER DUCK YOU.


That's just my first thought. My second thought:


WITH SOMETHING HARD, SANDPAPERY, WITHOUT LUBE, and perhaps with spikes or razorblades, maybe a little glitter just to spice it up YOU RUBBER DUCK WAD.

My Third thought is:

Really? Really you have NO life that you have to rain on someones parade for getting a DD just because your stupid ass doesn't think it's worthy? Well, opinions are like assholes and everybody's got one, except, just like a fart, YOU don't have to share yours when it comes to something the artists has no control over.

All you snot rockets do is complain. Grow the rubber duck up already. How about, oh I don't know, give some meaningful critique? Oh I'm sorry, I'm asking you to put some effort into something other than bitching.

Why are you bitching? Oh, wait, what? You have something in your gallery that you think is worthy of a DD and your bottom lip wibbles every time you think of how unfair it is that art you don't like gets recognized for ONE RUBBER DUCKING DAY as a PAT ON THE BACK and not like a life time achievement award, and you STILL want to bitch and moan?


A new rule should be placed. If you comment negatively on a piece that received a DD just for the fact that it received a DD and you disagree by being an ass hat, YOU ARE BLACKLISTED from commenting on all future DDs. Or hell, let's not even let you have the chance to have a DD since you have such a problem with the way the system works. It's better just to take you out of the system.

I don't get it. I just don't get why the hell you people got to be so ignorant, disrespectful and bitter little cum nuggets. YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN A BLOW JOB! Actually, no, that's too good. You should have been discarded in a lotion soaked tissue.

IF you have a problem with the way DD's are nominated and chosen, which rubber duck you if you do because it's not that big of a rubber ducking deal in the first place, you need to take it up with the person who featured that piece.

I mean, COME ON! Would you go into your work where a celebration for Mr. Rodgers retiring is going on, slap the piece of cake out of his hand and say "YOU DON"T DESERVE CAKE, YOU OLD RUBBER DUCKER, I NEVER LIKED THE WAY YOU DID THINGS!"

Mr. Rodgers would get the rubber duck up and bring down his tennis ball capped cane down on your sorry ass.

Quit your bitching about how DA is all corporate bull shit now, and how everything is a popularity contest and wah wah wah, I took the pills and my penis isn't getting any bigger. Take your cry baby ass to photobucket.

The only reason this honkey tonk road show becomes a popularity contest is because YOU THINK IT IS. It's not a popularity contest. You're either a good artist, or your not. You're either a like-able person, or people would like to skull rubber duck you.

You all complain about how no-body watches you or comments on your shit and then someone who isn't known well in the community gets a DD and gets recognized for ONE DAY, gets feedback for ONE DAY, and you have to come in and be a dick when that could just as well be one of your pieces.

FOR RUBBER DUCK SAKE!

You know what, If you can't contribute positively to an art community then get the rubber duck out. I don't need you're little emo rain cloud hovering over my hard work, dedication, and love for art.

Now that you've read this, Get the rubber duck off my journal you puss filled bloody cum bubble.


To everyone else, CONGRATS on your DD, past, present and future. I'll fondle your good bits in celebration of your achievements.
Add a Comment:
 
:iconsaintlavellan:
SaintLavellan Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2012
This is the best thing I have ever read.
Day= made.
I'm so sick of idiots trolling the people who got DDs because they're so self deprecating they got to rain on everyone else's parade.
IN FACT. This should get a DD lmfao <3
Reply
:iconcherieosaurus:
Cherieosaurus Featured By Owner Mar 5, 2012  Professional General Artist
My god, I wrote that thing 2 years ago. XD Glad it's still out there though because it is a HUUUUUUGE problem in this community, especially with hate groups such as
:iconbutthurtbrigade: which claim that they aren't a hate group, which is funny because they're all cyber bullies and inconsiderate pricks. THE BEST PART of that stupid group is that if you confront them, they block you immediately because they say you're there to stir up drama. It's such a biased group of barely literate assholes and they will be my next topic for sure.
Reply
:iconsaintlavellan:
SaintLavellan Featured By Owner Mar 5, 2012
Ahaha unfortunately yeah this is still absolutely true since just this morning I witnessed some trolling because someone got a DD. xD I'm glad I found this again, it absolutely needs to be read by everyone imho : P
And wow that actually makes me sad that there's a group out there like that. Not surprising, just pathetically sad. I bet 90% of that group is all a bunch of angsty attention seeking preteens lmfao
Reply
:iconsilver-tao111:
Silver-Tao111 Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
idk why this is funny?! XD RUBBER DUCKER BIG LUCKER OENCES THEY ARE-....-whoever they are... O.e
Reply
:iconnettlestorm:
NettleStorm Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2011
WOOT WOOT! FIGHT THE RUBBER DUCKING POWER!!!!!!!!




One question though what does DD mean?
Reply
:iconfoxhearts:
Foxhearts Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2011
i. laughed. SO. MUCH. :D :D :D thank you!
Reply
:iconcherieosaurus:
Cherieosaurus Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2011  Professional General Artist
HA, you're sooooooooo welcome.
Reply
:iconallendra3:
Allendra3 Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Amen! I completely agree!
Reply
:iconjace-z:
Jace-Z Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2010
This is rubber ducking amazing.
Reply
:iconlithriel:
lithriel Featured By Owner Sep 27, 2010  Professional Digital Artist
I realize I am epicly late with this, but seeing as I just saw some craptacular hate on the DD'd base today it was fresh in my mind. I just wanted to say, I love you. *Doller high five*
Reply
:iconflammenwolf:
Flammenwolf Featured By Owner Aug 13, 2010
I´m going to remember the "You should´ve been a blow job" line ^^

You made my day!
Reply
:iconcherieosaurus:
Cherieosaurus Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2010  Professional General Artist
The best part about that line is when you use it on people who should have been blow jobs, 9 times out of 10 they don't even get it....because they should have been blow jobs.
Reply
:iconflammenwolf:
Flammenwolf Featured By Owner Aug 15, 2010
So true xD
Reply
:iconfrenchw1nter:
frenchw1nter Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2010  Student General Artist
Haha I like this purely for the line, "MAN, sometimes I want to head butt my computer screen and hope that the idiot on the other side feels it." And other things, but yeah. lol! ;P
Reply
:iconcherieosaurus:
Cherieosaurus Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2010  Professional General Artist
Ha, thanks! I'd probably be the only idiot to feel it though, so it would be an epic fail on my part. :P
Reply
:iconfrenchw1nter:
frenchw1nter Featured By Owner Aug 2, 2010  Student General Artist
Cheah. But it was FUNNY, so... :XD: Great stuff.
Reply
:iconksteinhoff:
KSteinhoff Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2010
:iconclapplz:
Reply
:iconlujlious:
LujLious Featured By Owner Jul 18, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
Very well said man! :thumbsup: :XD:
Reply
:iconaalyvewyyre:
aalyvewyyre Featured By Owner Jun 13, 2010  Hobbyist Artist
Well said, Cherieosaurus! <3 I agree 150%!
Reply
:iconyouhaveashortmemory:
YouHaveAShortMemory Featured By Owner Jun 7, 2010  Student Filmographer
Ain't it the rubber-ducking truth! :D :clap:
Reply
:iconnothingbuteverything:
this is the best news article i have ever read :D i can think of at least a couple people that completely need to read this that commented on my DD. I never comment on someone's DD like that, even if i don't like it. they need to get a rubber ducking life!
Reply
:iconladykylin:
LadyKylin Featured By Owner May 24, 2010  Hobbyist
Win! This made my day! I wish everyone ranted in such an amusing way, I might actually listen more often. That this manged to amuse me, not use foul language and get your point across is awesome.
Reply
:iconxenophotography:
XenoPhotography Featured By Owner May 24, 2010
kudos
Reply
:iconsanguinevoyager:
SanguineVoyager Featured By Owner May 22, 2010
You made my day! I have not laughed so hard in such a long time.
Thanks

PS - I know, a bit behind on my reading.
Reply
:icongreenxgirl:
greenxgirl Featured By Owner May 7, 2010
:clap:
Reply
:icongirlorbital:
girlorbital Featured By Owner May 2, 2010
a girl after my own heart. Well done chicka.
Reply
:iconroyaled-pixels:
royaled-pixels Featured By Owner May 1, 2010   Digital Artist
:iconclapplz:
Reply
:iconxyrenoftwilight:
xyrenoftwilight Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2010   Traditional Artist
I read this and laughed so hard I cried...

Very well done article!

And now the Harry Potter community will finally know what the exact function of a rubber duck is.
Reply
:iconpnthr808:
Pnthr808 Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2010
Rubber Duck? Amen.
Reply
:iconmrzoozoo:
MrZooZoo Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2010  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Amen, brotherah!
Reply
:iconvelcake:
VelCake Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2010  Professional General Artist
"I LOVE YOU BABE!!!!":la::la::la:
Your article is epic win.Seriously,that's exactly how I do feel.Llama for you.:heart::llama:
Reply
:iconhaliesama:
haliesama Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2010
So you NEVER, EVER look at something and think, "Why the fuck did they give a DD to this piece?" Because I do all the time. And guess what; I am neither bitter/butthurt/angry/jealous or any other adjective you can throw at me. Hell, take a look at my gallery, I'm not trying too hard.

Asskissing pisses me off. There's being nice and then there's outright lying for the sake of not hurting someone's feelings. I, however, prefer honesty. Even if it stings.

There are many TALENTED and UNRECOGNIZED artists on deviantart, some of whom are recognized with DDs. Some of the DD recipients just plan ol' don't deserve it. I know in reality it's just my opinion, but they don't. Seriously, shitty ass-kissing "tutorials" about ~*~being nice~*~ don't deserve DDs. "Stock" images (really just myspace pix) don't deserve DDs. Etc.

Also, I hate when someone is talented and some lame ass piece of theirs is given a DD rather than the fucking awesome stuff they have in their gallery. Or artists who get more than one recognition. When all of the artists who deserve a DD are given one, then y'all can give out seconds. It is downright unfair to those who honestly are deserving.

Daily Deviations, in my mind, are supposed to be like a heads-up find: hey, look at this artist we have yet to feature. This is interesting. Unfortunately, it tends to be one big circle jerk. But I still keep looking for times where something great is actually put up.
Reply
:iconxlntwtch:
xlntwtch Featured By Owner May 3, 2010   Writer
Agree.
Reply
:iconthat-one-midget:
That-One-Midget Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2010  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
:thumbsup:
Reply
:iconhaliesama:
haliesama Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2010
inb4 "ur jus angry"/"ur jeliz"

Um, no. Annoyed, yes. The reason it may sound it? I'm just cranky and hungry.

God damn am I hungry.

PS: I am in no way trying to insult those who really do great work. It's why I come online to appreciate that. I just have annoyances.
Reply
:iconhaliesama:
haliesama Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2010
PPS: I'm not one of the mean commenters, either; but I certainly fucking think it and know y'all do too.

Ok. I'm out now. :)
Reply
:iconalatarieltinuviel9:
AlatarielTinuviel9 Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2010
Haha. You tell them! :) I totally agree. If you really dislike something, why the hell don't you just not comment or actually critique it. It's the ADULT thing to do.
Reply
:iconcherieosaurus:
Cherieosaurus Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2010  Professional General Artist
Exactly, and now people are trying to say that there is going to be negative critique along with positive critique.

BWAH? There has never been a division as far as I know. Critique is just critique. "I like the way you did this, but it would be better if you tried doing this instead." "You need to work on your perspective if you wish to convey realism" "I question your color choices on this piece, perhaps if you tried a color wash over the piece it would make the colors relate better."

Positive comments:
Cute, I like this
Wow
Neat

There is no meat on it, but hell it's not:

Er...why does this have a DD?

That's a KANYE. It's rude to get up on stage and ruin the moment. It's not a critique, it has no merit, and the opinion of that user makes no different as it IS a DD and will remain a DD no matter what, so their rude comment is even MOOT.

Listen to me raving on. Haha, Thanks for the comment.
Reply
:iconwhitefox00:
whitefox00 Featured By Owner May 1, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
But isn't there going to be both positive and negative critique? It can be constructive either way. "This piece certainly isn't your best drawing. The lineart is too thick in these areas and the colour seems off around here. Try this colour instead." That's negative, but still constructive. Positive critique would indicate that the piece is 'good', and also list the criteria for that judgement. Negative critique would work the same way, labeling the piece as 'bad'. Non-constructive critique stops at this point, constructive critique will go on to include how the work could be made better. It's rather rare to find universal approval (or disapproval).

The positive comments you listed may make someone feel better, but the mechanics are just the same as the "why does this have a DD?" comment. Saying "Awesome!" isn't a critique, it doesn't really have a lot of merit if you don't back it up with any further information, and the opinion of the person saying "Awesome!" will make no difference as to whether the DD will remain or not.

I agree with your overall premise (I'd find it rather hard to not accept a DD, and I don't believe people are even given that choice before it happens), but I find your reasoning a bit out of place. Questioning the merit of a specific DD is fine, but it should go to the gallery moderator who selected it, and the person who suggested it, if one exists. The artist doesn't have much of a say in the matter, and shouldn't be blamed.
Reply
:iconalatarieltinuviel9:
AlatarielTinuviel9 Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2010
Haha. No worries. I think you're spot on. And thanks for the badge. :)
Reply
:iconmelazzee:
Melazzee Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2010   Filmographer
Remember, there will ALWAYS be positives AND negatives :D I have often seen a Daily Deviation and thought WTF? Why the hell is that a daily deviation? I would never say that to anyone though, and I will leave a comment picking up on all the parts of the picture I really like :D
Reply
:iconparticularlyme:
Particularlyme Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2010
Clever usage of rubber ducks here.
Reply
:iconthe-photographicpoet:
the-photographicpoet Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Hey there, you have been featured in the dA Announcements Issue 003. article posted earlier today

Please feel free to check it out and spread the word

If you want to be featured next week, then you can let me know by posting in the dA Announcements Forum

Thanks, Sammie
:rose:
Reply
:iconlost--beauty:
lost--beauty Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2010
Oh, AMEN to this. :iconhappyfellaavatar:
Reply
:iconl0ne:
L0ne Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2010
"give some meaningful critique? Oh I'm sorry, I'm asking you to put some effort into something other than bitching."


"You know what, If you can't contribute positively to an art community then get the rubber duck out. I don't need you're little emo rain cloud hovering over my hard work, dedication, and love for art."

A meaningful critique can be a negative critique as much as a positive one. You're saying to only leave 'positive' critiques...
DeviantArt is a place to grow as an artist, negative comments are essential to learn where our mistakes are & to know what to improve on.
Reply
:iconcherieosaurus:
Cherieosaurus Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2010  Professional General Artist
There has never been a division of critique as far as I know. Critique is just critique. "I like the way you did this, but it would be better if you tried doing this instead." "You need to work on your perspective if you wish to convey realism" "I question your color choices on this piece, perhaps if you tried a color wash over the piece it would make the colors relate better."

"Why does this have a DD?" isn't helping the artist grow at all.

I just don't see the meaning behind those comments that say it is undeserving of a DD. Even if it is undeserving in ones opinion, it's completely moot since the DD will not be removed. Therefore it's rudeness for rudeness sake. It doesn't matter in what way people convey their dismay over a piece getting a DD, it's just like Kanye jumping up on stage and ruining the moment for the person receiving the award.
Reply
:iconl0ne:
L0ne Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2010
I see where you're coming from, but sometimes it's good to let a little steam out.
Have you seen what's been making it to DD's lately? Not only are they giving out way too many (Just the other day I read the reason written for it's submission, it was "it's kool". That's cool with a 'k' & no capitalization of the first word. DA has turned into a cesspool of illiterate yuppies, but that's a rant for another day).

I'm all for people posting whatever art they've come up with, but Daily Deviations should be revised and reduced. By posting 'This does not deserve a DD' on an artwork, we aren't necessarily criticizing the artwork itself, but rather the fact that it was accepted as receiving a DD versus the hundreds of undiscovered masterpieces that float around on this site.

DeviantArt isn't what it used to be, but what can you do, right? May as well adapt & just get used to things the way they are now & the direction they are heading in.
Reply
:iconpoisonmeforthefuture:
Fairplay this made me laugh me bollocks off!! Totally understand what you're saying and thoroughly enjoyed the way you've said it.
Now..where'd me bollocks go?
:D
Reply
:iconcherieosaurus:
Cherieosaurus Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2010  Professional General Artist
If I find your bollocks I will be sure to mail them back to you asap. Wondering around without your bollocks seems painful.

I'll make flyers if you like and post them around DA.

MISSING BOLLOCKS

IF FOUND PLEASE CONTACT POISONMEFORTHEFUTURE

*nod Nod*
Reply
:iconpoisonmeforthefuture:
Heheh!:lol:
No bollocks=Tighter pants=I can really hit the high notes when singing!;)
Reply
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April 22, 2010
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