This had me grinning all the way through! Jack is a wonderful character, he reminds me of a character I'm currently building for a role-play adventure! *scampers off to the second chapter*

Really beautifully written. There's a great deal here reminding me of the Music man and a young Robert Preston playing the part of Jack Pendragon.

I really appreciate the work you've put into your craft, it shows a joy that is very contagious.

Looking forward to reading the next installment.

With Admiration,

Remowylliams.

Your writing has a very refined, collected feeling to it. I can tell you felt a lot of confidence while you were developing the beginning of the story, and you've got excellent skill with the description of your characters and world.

It's very professional, and the accents of the characters add on to their personality. Jack's a real charmer, and you've done well. Congrats.
The only thing I was wondering about was when the old woman said;

"But do it have morphine?" said... etc.

Is this her accent? If so, never mind my comment and amazing literature.