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saturday morning coffee.

Tue Dec 29, 2015, 6:17 PM
Seattle held many secrets in its dreary rainfall: college kids having sex in the 7-11 bathroom, a drug dealer staking out Rainier Valley for new clientele, and, worst of all, a secret agent working at the Starbucks on 5th Avenue.  I had watched him for months now and every day something suspicious seemed to happen. Today, the strange behavior revolved around the chocolate syrup pump sitting surreptitiously behind neatly placed metallic coffee mugs for sale.  The perfect hiding spot for seedy behavior!  A woman I earmarked as pleasant-enough looking leaned over the counter cautiously, eye over her shoulder to detect any prying eyes. She whispered something to the duplicitous cashier who squinted his eyes and squished his face, as if he smelled something rancid.  Perhaps it were his devious plans that smelled so foul!  But alas, all that would transpire would be a few extra squirts of syrup into the woman's drink.  This wasn't enough to convince me of his lack of crime, of course.  So I sit and watch patiently, as one day there will surely be a reveal to this secret agent-cashier's evil master plan.  One day.

Skin by SimplySilent
This was written for OfOneSoul's Challenge Fun #87 forum thread.  The premise is to write a 500 (or less) word story about a secret agent.

You have 5 more days to join in, so you should!  There's a chance at winning 1200 points and we all could use those. :)
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:iconscribalwriter:
ScribalWriter Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2016   Traditional Artist
I really like the humor of the piece. The unreliable narrator was the perfect choice. Well done!
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:iconpulbern:
pulbern Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
"earmarked as pleasant-enough" I LOVE THIS. You definitely have a way with words. :hug:
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:iconbrennennn:
brennennn Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2016
I love that line, too!  :love:  Thank you, Adam!
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:iconkatatsumuri-hime:
katatsumuri-hime Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Very nicely written! I like all the descriptions and can really picture the scene in front of me. I also don't know if I should take the person serious or if s/he is being paranoid, although I don't know if that's intentionally haha! A nice creative piece to enjoy a grey late morning with a hot cup of tea :)
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:icondementedtaoist:
DementedTaoist Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2016   General Artist
This is quite great!!!  Has a nice flow to it!!!
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:iconbrennennn:
brennennn Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2016
I'm happy to hear that, thank you! :)
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:icondementedtaoist:
DementedTaoist Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2016   General Artist
My pleasure!
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:iconastrikos:
Astrikos Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2015  Hobbyist Artist
Lovely piece! :love:
I like your usage of exclamation marks and imagery! :la:
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:iconbrennennn:
brennennn Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2015
Thank you, Ali.  I'm glad you approve of the exclamation mark because I generally avoid them in my writing. :lol:
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:iconag-cat:
Ag-Cat Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Those secret agent cashiers, they're everywhere! CURSE YOU! 
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:iconbrennennn:
brennennn Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2015
Yes they are. :ninja:
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:iconlenorepop:
LenorePop Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015
This is very nicely written. Also, I live in Seattle Giggle 
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:iconbrennennn:
brennennn Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2015
Awesome!  Did I get the landmarks correct?
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:iconlenorepop:
LenorePop Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2015
Definitely!
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December 29, 2015
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