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Chapter one

  "Goliath how I hate you for keeping my daughter away from me." growled Demona
as she flew to her current base, an old Victorian she purchased but what was on her
doorstep was a surprise to the gargoyle. A girl with blue eyes red pigtails in a black
dress with a stuff elephant was asleep filthy from running from something. Demona
growled sunrise be here soon and no one could see her become human. So she
scooped up the little girl and went inside. She placed the girl on the bed. She never
used it it was just there for show. "Why is this wretched human child here" she
roared in anger and pain as she transformed into her human form. "Mommy" wept
the girl sad "Your mother isn't here human" said Demona angry "Why did you die
mommy why did those men come and kill you?" she sobbed. Demona seem to
soften when she heard this, 'How can humans be so disgusting they even kill one
of they're kind in front of a child' thought Demona angry taking the small girl about
six years old in her arms and cradling her



"Maza we need you to investigate a murder seen later" said Elisa's boss. "Okay chief" said Elisa going to get some rest she ask Goliath to come with her after dark.



Later Elisa along with Goliath went to the murder seen. "Elisa what caused this?"
asked Goliath "Apparently the victim and his wife were killed because he saw a
crime in progress and was going to testify in court" said Elisa sad "It looks like
they had a daughter"said Goliath staring at a photo of the little girl with a stuff
elephant "The creep probably took her with him to kill later" said Elisa staring at the
photo as well.


Demona was about to leave when the child woke up "Mommy" she said staring at
Demona "Are you blind i am not your mother" said Demona angry "Please don't
leave me" she wept "Fine but what do they call you" said Demona "Momma and
Papa called me Deviant Devi for short" she sniffed "Very well Devi you may stay
here" sighed Demona she was being reduced to a weakling like Goliath by a human
child, still Devi gave her someone to give love too. Demona went to make Devi some
food "You will be my child if nothing more than to throw those snoops in my
company off my trail" said Demona making a sandwich for Devi just a turkey
sandwich. until she knew if her new ward had food allergies it was best to stick
to things that weren't known to cause allergic reactions and brought it to Devi
"Thank you" smiled Devi as she ate the sandwich Demona tried but she smiled
Devi was such a sloppy eater much like any small child was. After Devi finished
her sandwich she yawned and went back to sleep Demona layed next to Devi and
went to sleep.

end chapter one
yes I'm sure its a gramatic nightmare but please tell me if its good i got the idea from a user and the fact that maybe if Demona was forced to deal with a child Human she be unable to not smile
Add a Comment:
 
:iconkaijuduke:
KaijuDuke Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2010
Devi's a cute name, but why would any parents name their child Deviant? O_O
Reply
:iconbonnybanshey:
bonnybanshey Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2010   Artist
it was that or Devila XD
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:iconiylene16:
Iylene16 Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2010
amazing! I love it :clap: :love:
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:iconbonnybanshey:
bonnybanshey Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2010   Artist
thanks
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:iconiylene16:
Iylene16 Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2010
you're welcome ^_^
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:iconbonnybanshey:
bonnybanshey Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2010   Artist
been playing kingdom hearts
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:iconiylene16:
Iylene16 Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2010
cool :D I like kingdom hearts x3
Reply
:iconbonnybanshey:
bonnybanshey Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2010   Artist
so do i hate my ps2 about to win kh 2 then my ps2 dies
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:iconiylene16:
Iylene16 Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2010
oh my gosh ;_; that sucks Dx
Reply
:iconbonnybanshey:
bonnybanshey Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2010   Artist
I know I was like god dam it why not after I beat the game
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(1 Reply)
:iconanimeweirdodudette:
Animeweirdodudette Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2010
This was adorable just reading it and Deviant almost made me jizz in my pant cause I named one of my Oc called Moo cause I was drinking organic milk XD
Reply
:iconbonnybanshey:
bonnybanshey Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2010   Artist
lol jizz
Reply
:iconanimeweirdodudette:
Animeweirdodudette Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2010
I was watching SNL and heard that song Id lol
Reply
:iconbonnybanshey:
bonnybanshey Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2010   Artist
I curse writers block I'm thinking of asking people to write a chapter and credit them
Reply
:iconanimeweirdodudette:
Animeweirdodudette Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2010
you got that right
Reply
:iconbonnybanshey:
bonnybanshey Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2010   Artist
you want to give it a try I am that desperate I will credit you I always credit people when I use characters
Reply
:iconanimeweirdodudette:
Animeweirdodudette Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2010
great I'm still stuck on writer's block but i'm okay X3
Reply
:iconbonnybanshey:
bonnybanshey Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2010   Artist
lol writers block is hitting everyone XD
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconlachasseresse:
LaChasseresse Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
While you're right about it needing a little grammatical TLC, I can see some potential for this story. :thumbsup:
Reply
:iconbonnybanshey:
bonnybanshey Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2009   Artist
thanks I really need to relearn english I pretty much work at a starbucks not much writing there
Reply
:iconlachasseresse:
LaChasseresse Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
^_^ no problem! I'm an English major at college, so if you have any questions, feel free to ask!
Reply
:iconbonnybanshey:
bonnybanshey Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2009   Artist
well what was I missing in this chapter
Reply
:iconlachasseresse:
LaChasseresse Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
not a whole lot to be honest. the biggest thing I noticed was using "seen" where you should have used "scene" (ex: crime scene).
Reply
:iconbonnybanshey:
bonnybanshey Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2009   Artist
oops sorry
Reply
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