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Description
Part 1 -[link]
Part 2 - its here
Part 3 - [link]
Next parts - when they are ready
Part 4 and 5 [link]
Part 6 [link]
Page 7 [link]
Page 8 [link]
Page 9 [link]
Page 10 [link]
Page 11 [link]
Page 12 [link]
Page 13 [link]
Page 14 [link]
Page 15 [link]
Page 16 [link]
Page 17 [link]
Page 18-19 [link]
Second page of my comic.
There is but a one easter egg on it. If you seen my previous works you will be able to find it.
This page was originally painted in GIMP then I used SAI to repaint it. And it looks way better.
Hope you like it and as always BIG HUG FROM LUNA AND ME FOR EVERYONE WHO FAV IT
MLP: FIM belongs to Hasbro
Comic and story is mine
Part 2 - its here
Part 3 - [link]
Next parts - when they are ready
Part 4 and 5 [link]
Part 6 [link]
Page 7 [link]
Page 8 [link]
Page 9 [link]
Page 10 [link]
Page 11 [link]
Page 12 [link]
Page 13 [link]
Page 14 [link]
Page 15 [link]
Page 16 [link]
Page 17 [link]
Page 18-19 [link]
Second page of my comic.
There is but a one easter egg on it. If you seen my previous works you will be able to find it.
This page was originally painted in GIMP then I used SAI to repaint it. And it looks way better.
Hope you like it and as always BIG HUG FROM LUNA AND ME FOR EVERYONE WHO FAV IT
MLP: FIM belongs to Hasbro
Comic and story is mine
Image size
1696x5407px 5.71 MB
© 2011 - 2024 Bonaxor
Comments48
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Overall
Vision
Originality
Technique
Impact
Let me start by saying that I like the colours used here. The soft brush strokes and mostly pastel colour scheme lend nicely to each other and are easy to look at. The one problem with this is that the blacks and other deep/vibrant colours clash with the others.
The drawing is decent. While it's quite clear your still learning, all of the essentials are there and it's clear you've put some thought into it. my biggest issue is in panel 5, where Celestia's coat is clearly visible outside her outline. Remember to use multiple layers on your drawing program and chip away at the excess colour with the eraser tool once you draw the outline.
When it comes to grammar, I'm willing to bet you speak polish more than english. Although the dialogue is read-able there are many small errors in the text (ill is used instead of I'll for example.).
The pacing of this comic is nice. Many artists forget that the panels need to breath, and I think that spreading Celestia's possession over 4 panels was a good choice. The comic itself seems to be a little heavy on the right side because of the thick pannel lines and additional panels on the right side, but that is a minor complaint at worst.
My one real problem with this is the text. I could barely read the text in panel 4 because the white dialogue was set on a cream background. The only thing that achieves is giving me a headache. Please choose either white or black, stick with it, and either place the text on a contrasting backdrop or use a text box.
This piece is not bad in the slightest. I can tell you put a fair bit of effort into it and I'll love to see more. The only reason I gave you a sub-par technical score if because of your grammar and confusing text, which can be improved with practice and better placement/colour of text. I don't want to mark originality because this is a fan comic and it would be unfair, but I have to put a mark in so just ignore it.
Good job and keep it up.
silverd4