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About Digital Art / Hobbyist BlueKnuckle24/Female/United States Recent Activity
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Head compare -remake- by blueharuka Head compare -remake- :iconblueharuka:blueharuka 305 16 I hope you know what you're doing! by blueharuka I hope you know what you're doing! :iconblueharuka:blueharuka 17 6 Luna by blueharuka Luna :iconblueharuka:blueharuka 34 10 Pokemon Headcanon- Half-Shiny Pokemon by blueharuka Pokemon Headcanon- Half-Shiny Pokemon :iconblueharuka:blueharuka 160 24 Hoothoot- Giant eyes by blueharuka Hoothoot- Giant eyes :iconblueharuka:blueharuka 199 14 DracoEevee- Commission by blueharuka DracoEevee- Commission :iconblueharuka:blueharuka 58 5 Boundless Confidence!- Commission by blueharuka Boundless Confidence!- Commission :iconblueharuka:blueharuka 65 3 The Horned Fury- Commission by blueharuka The Horned Fury- Commission :iconblueharuka:blueharuka 96 4 Landorus- The Unovian Earth God by blueharuka Landorus- The Unovian Earth God :iconblueharuka:blueharuka 296 16 Deviljho- A really mean Pickle by blueharuka Deviljho- A really mean Pickle :iconblueharuka:blueharuka 87 7 The TurtleDuck by blueharuka The TurtleDuck :iconblueharuka:blueharuka 151 10 OC Confession Meme by blueharuka OC Confession Meme :iconblueharuka:blueharuka 100 18 GURL POWUR by blueharuka
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Activity


Not feeling too well, so forgive me for the short, listed sentences and shit writing.
---------

- My grandmother (On my dad's side) passed away yesterday.

- My health, though still pretty damn awful, is slowly recovering.
Finally got the newly prescribed medication (Citalopram) along with some others
and its' reduced much of the terrible withdrawal symptoms---for now.

- I've decided against driving at all for right now, I am simply just too fearful of the road and am just not ready.
Planning on bike riding, city bus, riding with friends, and Uber instead.

- My anxiety and mood swings are out of control. 
One minute I'm terrified at every sound and subtle movement, the next minute I'm so fucking numb
that a serial killer could break into my house, threaten me, and I'll just be like; "Cool, man."
Neither of those strikes me as healthy.

- VE school is nearing its end soon.
As expected, the only good thing out of it was the friends I made there, otherwise,
didn't feel like I accomplished much there and just feels like yet another case of miscommunication
and a waste of time and money... to make things worse, I'm scared that I won't have a good paying job
quickly enough to pay back all the borrowed money as soon as they'd like.

I know age has nothing to do with, but I'll say it away;
Being 24, unemployed and still relying on a parent to pay for everything is a HORRIBLE feeling.
It's a living hell and is nothing to be proud of.

- Last but not least, I've been thinking of closing commissions for a while (Possibly permanently, but I sincerely hope not).
It's something I've been thinking about for quite a long time, but whether or not it's actually a good idea---I don't know.

The plan was to try and jump back onto owed art full time  once I'm done with school and finish up whatever orders I have left,
and then shut down art commissions as a whole, whether it's temporary or permanent, I still haven't decided yet.

It's mainly to focus all my time on improving at 3D modeling and my art in general so that maybe I could
try to find a full-time job revolving around character and creature design.

As of right now, I feel my art is mediocre.
Not the worst, but most certainly not the best.

There's no way I'll be able to make a decent living off of my current skills.

I want to take time to improve my art and myself, but it's hard to do that while worrying about school,
your health AND freaking out about how slow you are about getting commissions done for people
and feeling like they hate your guts for it.

I feel like I'm in a horrible mess right now and can barely think and function straight, I feel like I'm gonna vomit out my insides.

Comments


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:iconsouleata999:
SoulEata999 Featured By Owner Edited 2 days ago  Hobbyist General Artist
Yo, just wanted to drop in and say that I appreciate your fondness for Monster Hunter, Pokémon, and dinosaurs. Your art makes me grin for some reason??? But yeah, keep up the amazing work (on a healthy level), it's good stuff :)
Reply
:icondinri:
Dinri Featured By Owner Edited 2 days ago  Hobbyist General Artist
Dude, your art is amazing! >8D I gotta see more of it from now on!!
Reply
:iconpikachueeveegirl:
PikachuEeveeGirl Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2018
Is it bad that I'm doing a Pokémon Soul Silver nuzlocke and I see your art in my nuzlocke when playing... (Cause I love your designs)

Also..

My female Cyndaquil May..I made her a hybrid of a Eevee+Cyndaquil+Mighyena+Ursaring cause I took inspration in your Half-breed Cyndaquil boy..?
Reply
:iconblueharuka:
blueharuka Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2018  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Not a bad thing at all! :)

Aww, and I'm glad you find my works inspiring! :heart:

And wow, that hybrid sounds like it'd be an awesome design! :wow:

(Omg, I love your icon, banana cat is easily one of my most favorite memes of all time, I love that stupid-looking face. XD )
Reply
:iconpikachueeveegirl:
PikachuEeveeGirl Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2018
(Best Meme Ever)

Also, I'm one of your watchers and love your art!
Reply
:iconhellobobo:
hellobobo Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2018
Hi there. I hope you're doing better. Your artwork is great. I have a question about you world. Does team rocket operate similar to these ganagsters: www.youtube.com/watch?v=bTHBhM…
Reply
:iconblueharuka:
blueharuka Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2018  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Hello!

Thank you for the concern, as of right now I'm doing a lot better.
And it won't be long before the main contributor to a lot of my stress (VE School.) will be over. :)

I'm pretty sure that's pretty close to how they operate, yep-yep.
At least, that's how the ones that are serious about the business operate.

What most people get to see on the outside surface of the organization such as vandalism, robbery and simple loitering,
is mainly just "noob behavior" for newcomers, as a surprising amount of grunts are just young punks looking to be rebellious and show off
how "badass" they are, hence a lot of their cocky and overconfident attitudes.

These punks usually don't last very long in the gang and are often caught and arrested by police or actually quit all on their own.

But as mentioned earlier, all of that is only the child's play portion seen on the surface,
going deeper into the subject is where all of the actual scary stuff is.

Drug, People, and Pokemon smuggling
Murder and assassination
Extortion
Human and Pokemon sex trafficking 
Kidnapping
Terrorism

The list goes on.

In fact, when I mentioned that some grunts quit on their own, the most common reason is that they learn all about this
kind of stuff and decide they want no actual part in it after all. A good portion of them truly are just losers and school dropouts
that didn't know any better and really do believe that it's just something to get into to make them "look cool".

Some quit and basically have their silence about what they know and have seen bought, 
(But still aren't exactly "free", they ARE still often being watched) while others----well, others just won't be seen or heard from ever again.

Though there are some individuals that really are just absolutely horrible people and stay in the gang and participate
in all of the awful deeds, mainly for the money they receive.
------------

Whoo, sorry this response is so long! ^^;
Reply
:iconhellobobo:
hellobobo Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2018
Glad to hear you're getting better. And don't apologize about the long response, I'm learning more and more about your pokemon world and it is awesome. I hope you don't mind these questions; 1. will Razzle and Robin get involves with them, and 2. is there a Jessie, James, and Meowth, and 3. if so, how will talking pokemone work in your world.
Reply
:iconblueharuka:
blueharuka Featured By Owner Jul 6, 2018  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Hoo boy, they will DEFINITELY get involved with them, in fact, TR is the cause of so much grief for the two.

Jessie, James and Meowth....they likely exist in this world, but they're hardly a threat. They could even be put into the "Noob" category.
But if anything, I like to imagine them as posers who somehow got a hold of some old style Rocket gang uniforms and are trying their hardest to join the gang but are actively ignored.

Talking Pokemon work about the same way as they do in the official version,
they are extremely rare with a very small amount of Pokemon actually being able to form full sentences and hold actual conversations with humans.
(Though many psychics are able to telepathically hold conversations with their Psychic Pokemon just fine.
Robyn herself is not a psychic, her Pokemon are actually physically speaking with her and she to them.)

Pokemon such as Magmortar, Chatot, Ludicolo and Nuzleaf are known for being able
to repeat a lot of words they hear from their trainers or others, as for how they are able to do so is still not yet understood.

Talking Pokemon does happen in this world, though it's way more startling and unsettling to most people instead of just having what I like to call "The Scooby Doo effect" as for how it does in the anime.
(Where a non-human creature speaks the human language and no one really seems to care about it)
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconsilver-almond:
Silver-Almond Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2018  Hobbyist General Artist
I absolutely love your art style! Your creativity with your Pokemon and the Halfbreeds are amazing! Keep up the great work! :D

Also, I hope you're doing well with all that's going on in your life right now. But just to hopefully make your day a bit better, your artwork is awesome and truly inspiring. :)
Reply
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