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i hosted an art show in my home studio gallery
it was poorly attended out of those invited
but those who showed were true art appreciators

i sold 22 paintings.....
that makes me happy

i will be cataloging  the sold pieces to post on here
as well as documenting the whole artistic set up of my first apartment
as i am moving out very soon

i will notate pieces that have been sold
and ones that are still for sale
over the next few weeks i will be uploading several pieces that i have not yet catalogued

be prepared
scenic paint class is over
officially the hardest class I've ever taken

umm i have a lot of art thats not posted yet, but i'm back now, so you won't have long to wait

semester over!!!

only two more left and i'm outta here
  • Listening to: matmos of course
  • Reading: cryptonomicon
walls of my own
hello mr scanner

its soon to be
full strong
head on
down to the

its good to be


soon to work, but back am i
my scanner is far away
lots of finished emotions will have to wait a while
its keeps getting worse
but i'm still happy
no car
no job
no money
no college
no fun
no change

hopefullly i will get some cash soon so i can start emtoing while im at my summer home otherwise it won't be till august that everything gets updated........for now its done
maybe i will just borrow my fathers scanner from his office.......hmmmmm

oh well
take care
i miss you  all
to the marrow bones of colden wander lost
i tail off to lands of new preen and shine for
kindred gold

if you feel unconcerned then you are in the right
for nothing but the slow blues of time pausing representation flowing fine
a few

simply that just a floor ground with gravity
cacti stools for rest to sit ponder wild night minds
tis more
i did
i did
i did
id id

asfdasdfz 2wgnkl/jad

to feel is good
but bad seems for now
shiney broight again it will
i lied to you all
the world lied to me
or rather i misheard distorted truthful speak
and slowly fell asle
how can you tell me you think that its grand, its in line
thats no good for me
i really do say the mean (ing) of my words
stuck with a foolish grin i have gone to bed
ohhh tell me if you can't beleive be live like
near and in a special place
where love is one for all all
and none of us can hate the other
for the course is different
but the path the same
it came and went i slide away
the pull and drag of upper age
guage the situation
slightly false
fully real
lights a flare
settle down to move
estaticly unfound
lie there lay and
i can hear your breath
on air away
not this to
so fully
until a final night
I had a dream about it last night
the most amazing
least satisfying horror of the hour

In this dream they stood peering seeping seeking for approvment
In this i can be a only
walking the laugh is surely
i afar lukcy little fate
The dream was born in simple settings
all your own
each of  the
i take
closer to a scale and chair
pricked fingers help through
says above my pulsing hand
Beauty rest still in the people
of my dream
advising and expressing
encounted and restored
surprise surpass
all the others dreaming
down following so shaken

I guess it turned out
i don't remember

dreams may come
dreams will flee
whatever breathes in me
should hold
tighly leaping over fear
If you always knew
that i was no
longer in your favor
something must have changed

Ashen trees and salty breeze
will never fill that void
if you sincerely are
then i shall never be

Its not the wrong
or writing of madman
is all i ever hope to be
The quiet lonely hours are best spent with a cup of coffe a stack of pancackes
and intellectually stimulating conversation.

The first meeting of the International Pancke Peace Fellowship was held with great success.

The only draw back was the intense lack of flexibility on the part of the corporate handlers, stipulations and fine print thwart the original plan

When thick and sticky glops of sugar seep into spongy batter i know that
nothing can keep me from achieving my goal

Again, our white bands hang from the table surrendering our stomachs to the

The final scoop of syrup gave me the way to a brand new life,
one of satisfaction and relaxed societal rules.

The secondary piece of fellowship, the wits of wars and thoughts on breakfast,
make my companion a hearty hero for the poached and the lost.
riders on the storm........such a great song


being such, on wires
graven images on flyers placed around the open
sending such, of fire
not a single
yearly claims more than his fare share
time wasted in monetary fallicies and quick eternities of dust
loving such, in lies
this public service
lacks an ounce of faith meant for those "incapibabble"
I'm feeling inspired yet all too "alone" sits in these bones
Outside of the
When your history fills to the brim with the unforgetten
Creation of the
His sordid ways of wandering the nightly prowl
Dissmisal of the
Her seeking shelter in this rain above the cloudy eye
Finding of the
Their silly days from the sleepy remains
Connection of the

Hear now here
silet ear

it does

Here, now, my friend

or of the

hopeless kind
like gold

got no

night fell upon him with stars and stripes
a quite
place to be in

lets open
into suns almighty
for trust
filter out the sunny side
up the stream
and battle the tide
rage and roar
moan in tones
forgotten paths too long away
begin the morning boiling
settle till the dusk
along the wall
in her shadow

inside out the side of heats of hears
nothing really is
innterconnected in nothing
falling gloating floating down
to ages unknown
come forth
and speak your peace
Here again, nothing free
Feel the soft and sacred
Hear again, nothing fun

when time has come and gone
and the center is still spinning
I believe that college is not for everyone.

It may be just what most people need to help ease their way into real life.

However, i have some problems with institutions run like CSU, as well as many of the individuals who float around campus and the town lost in a sea of "preperation"

I want to just get out there and let real life take over. I know what i want to do with myself. I can learn just through experience, and i don't think the repetitive memorization of many classes facilitates real learning.

Just get on with it. You can handle it. You're human.
so a journal eh....

today was a day just as tomorrow and yesterday
it will always be now, never tomorrow or last year, its always today
when one stopssssss to consider it the entire lasting effect is lost and its possible to overstep ones original boundries

you must step outside the box in order to more fully grasp the box that you have been givin, by whatever means nessesary

if you happen to read this journalllle whether you know me or not mke a comment or send me a massage.........