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Numb by BlackTalonArts Numb by BlackTalonArts
Something more simple, something less draining, something....


I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface
I don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow
I've become so numb, I can't feel you there
Become so tired, so much more aware
By becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you ~Linkin Park

DazStudio Iray - Render
Lighting & backdrop by me, created in C4d (One Light w/Hdri set at .10)
Zbrush for anatomy corrections and morphing the pants & strings to pull them away from body, wrist bracelet getting the chain to lay properly on the the body/wrist
Photoshop for interjecting a bit more of me and tattoo on lower abdomen

Thanks for viewing, comments, favs and anything else you want to interject.  mad love to all of you and especially to those that sent me a special private message.  :glomp:
Add a Comment:
 
:iconsnell35damzel:
Snell35Damzel Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2019
Excellent pose
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2019
Thanks! :)
Reply
:iconshadowhawk9973:
Shadowhawk9973 Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2019  Hobbyist General Artist
Beautiful!
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:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 5, 2019
Thank you! :)
Reply
:iconshadowhawk9973:
Shadowhawk9973 Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2019  Hobbyist General Artist
You're welcome :-)
Reply
:iconarmieri:
armieri Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2019
Thumbs Up 
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:iconmagnus-strindboem:
Magnus-Strindboem Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2019  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:) She's beautiful.

 Can't help...
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:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2019
Thanks Magnus. :)
Reply
:iconaograi:
AOGRAI Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2019  Hobbyist General Artist
Never got to see a gal like her on my trip through Austin... Nashville and Taos New Mexico!
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2019
hahaha, maybe next time? :)
Reply
:iconaograi:
AOGRAI Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2019  Hobbyist General Artist
Maybe in another lifetime. Duno when I will ever go on a road trip like that! Lol!
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 5, 2019
LOL  You never ever know. :D
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:iconaograi:
AOGRAI Featured By Owner Mar 5, 2019  Hobbyist General Artist
Well there is always the Highway to Hell! (AC/DC) lol!
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:iconlogic12304:
Logic12304 Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2019  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Great job Mel! Looks awesome:)
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2019
Thank you so much! :hug:
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:iconlaspe:
Laspe Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2019  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Impressive work as always, Mel, appealing and strong character. The lyrics fit perfectly!
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:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2019
Thanks Laspe.  Much appreciated. :)
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:iconlaspe:
Laspe Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2019  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Very welcome!
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:iconvalzheimer:
VAlzheimer Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2019  Professional Digital Artist
Absolutely gorgeous! :heart:
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2019
:glomp:
Reply
:iconvalzheimer:
VAlzheimer Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2019  Professional Digital Artist
:hug:
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:iconpolyrender:
Polyrender Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2019  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Nice job on your last 2.  I really liked the sci-fi one.  Sorry for your loss :( (Sad) Hug 
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:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2019
Thank you Kurt, I'm still struggling to pull myself above water and get back to form :hug:
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:iconobscuroarcanum:
ObscuroArcanum Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2019  Professional Digital Artist
This is fantastic to see you're still keeping busy, despite going through such a horrendous time. :huggle:
This is a simple but beautifully executed portrait and the attention to detail with positioning the cords
and chains in Zbrush really adds that bit extra. Lovely work with the tattoos and getting them to look
so good against the skin. The dramatic lighting and the half-shadow on her face is also very striking.

Beautiful, beautiful work my friend! :huggle: :love:
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2019
Don't let that fool you my dear Kat.  I struggle every day and every image I do is a struggle. :(  I fear I'm losing my voice.  I hope that I do not lose it forever.
Thank you so much.  Lots and lots of hugs your way.  :glomp:
Reply
:iconobscuroarcanum:
ObscuroArcanum Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2019  Professional Digital Artist
:huggle: You might be struggling every day and every image is a struggle, but the important thing
is that you're keep in fighting - you keep plugging away on an image until it's finished and you don't
give in to despair, tearing down your galleries and walking away from 3D. I think the fear that you're
losing your voice is natural when you're in such a dark place right now, but a time has to come when
things start getting better, or if not better then at least a little easier. Just remember to breathe,
relax and don't put extra stress on your shoulders. (I'm needing to remind myself of these things now
the weather seems to have FINALLY taken a turn for the better and I'm getting back to the artses.
I'm crippled with having 3 months away from Zbrush and forgetting 90% of what I learned from the
tutorials I binged on.)

Lots and lots of hugs and love and positive thoughts your way, my dear Mel! :huggle: :love:
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2019
Your words are so true Kat.  As they say "Easier said, than done".  I don't want to be in despair or flounder around with lack of inspiration for sure.  But I'm also trying to give myself time.  What isn't helping is the snow we seemingly get every day.  I feel like I haven't been out of the house in months.  Winter blues/depression has for the first time slammed right on top of my head. LOL  Sounds like yours has already given you reprieve.  Thank goodness.

Don't worry about feeling like you've lost everything learned.  It comes back rather quickly.  Our brains can be downright amazing sometimes.  I mean how does it hold a lifetime of memories, senses, smells and all that stuff.  I mean sheesh.  We don't ask much do we? lol

Lots of hugs back at you!  :glomp:
Reply
:iconobscuroarcanum:
ObscuroArcanum Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2019  Professional Digital Artist
Hehe! This definitely comes under the heading of "Easier said than done" and it often makes you
stress MORE when you tell yourself to stress less and remember to breathe. It's something that
shouldn't be so hard, but it definitely is, more so when you're already feeling out of sorts. Ugh! On
top of everything else, you're having to deal with the snow! Coming from an area that doesn't see
snow, I would be highly excitable by the whiteness, but for you dealing with it every winter, you
probably loathe the snow as much as I loathe Summer! I really hope the snow lets off enough that
you can take a walk outside, even if it's just to rug up warmly to go out into your garden for 10
minutes - even 10 minutes of fresh air (albeit freezing air!) can do wonders for perking you up.

I don't know if this change in the weather is a permanent one and I have seen the last of the hottest
temperatures, but I'm making the most of it to putter around in Zbrush and try and pick up where I left
off with my projects. I have been binging a lot on tutorials to give the old brain a jump-start.

It's really weird! I have some memory of basic functionality of Zbrush, the commands and tasks I
started doing subconsciously (thankfully I haven't forgotten how to navigate! lol) and I remembered
a few keyboard shortcuts, but more technical things of how I got a certain result in the models I was
working on before Summer hit I'm drawing a blank! I ended up putting those older files to one side
and started fresh, making the models from scratch. There have been a few false starts, but I'm
plodding along okay. I'm just struggling now to tame Zbrush's ZModeller to get what I imagine on
the screen. I'll have to move to Blender soon enough to create my UVs, so I'm in no great hurry to
leave Zbrush, which is at least familiar and comfortable for me, whereas my knowledge of Blender is
limited. (I have been watching tutorials though, because I'm coming to the realisation I need to use
something with Zbrush in the time until I get my paws on Modo.) I'll get there though!

Many hugs and lots of positive vibes!!! :huggle: :love: :glomp:
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 5, 2019
So true.  But isn't that the case with so many things in life? I would really love to have one of those Zen Hippie type personalities where it seems like nothing in the world ever bothers me and always walking around with a smile on my face. heh

Speaking of snow, hey guess what?  We got MORE snow!! MF OMG WTF BBQ? lol ugh   But yea, we are on opposite sides of temperatures and at one point I'm sure we meet in the middle.   I love winter though and I do love snow.  But this year has been really bad. :(
Hopefully it is NOT a yearly pattern or I may have to talk hubby into to moving somewhere a bit warmer. :D

Pfft, don't fret it will all come back.  I keep telling myself I'm going to go through some more training so I'll know how to do more than just morphs.  However, sitting in front of the computer all day is not what I want.    Zmodeler is something massively cool that I want to learn as well, but it's so different than a regular 3d modeling program.  With Blender's revamp to 2.8 the whole interface has changed and it's beautiful and more user friendly.  You should download the beta and see what you think. 

Hugs back at you!! Thank you Kat. :glomp:
Reply
:iconobscuroarcanum:
ObscuroArcanum Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2019  Professional Digital Artist
lol I couldn't imagine having one of those Zen Hippie personalities. Those overly cheerful
people give me a headache and I have a suspicious nature. Anyone who wanders around
so happy all the time with a perpetual smile on their face can't be trusted. What do they
know that we don't that makes them so happy, anyway? They're up to no good, I tells ya!

So much for going outside to get some fresh air! lol More snow to keep the temperatures
cold and the landscape the pristine featureless white nothingness. We will have to meet
in the middle at some point. It was rainy and overcast today, nice and cool too... and the
sun came out late in the afternoon, so it won't hide for very long.

:huggle: Having such a bad year, the extremes in temperatures bother us more keenly,
whether it is high heat or freezing temperatures. The misery is exacerbated, but perhaps
it's worse during the Winter months when you also have to contend with every person you
know becoming a walking viral incubator and passing around colds and the flu like presents.
Next year will have to be better for you!

ZModeler, in typical Zbrush fashion, is very different. The basic functions you take for granted
in other programs are a little trickier in ZModeler - or perhaps it's just me still needing to find
my way. I'm enjoying it though. I'm making some wall ornaments for the scene I'm working
on and I wanted them to have a nice curve-- I spent 3 days banging my head against it
before I finally managed it. My topology is a little wonky, but I'm happy with the results and it's
all practice, clocking up more hours in Zbrush.

I have Blender 2.79 installed because that's stable (I am favouring Stable over Shiny Newness)
and that helped out when I needed a proper polarised sphere, but I am yet to make anything
substantial yet. I look at Blender, look at the tutorials, then look at how quickly I took to Zbrush
and I just think, "You and I will not be friends". That being said, there are some cool things that
Blender does that I am eager to try. I have BIG plans for the Fractured Cell function. Something
that isn't endearing me with Blender is how the tutorials I'm watching is focusing on
modelling/texturing/rendering inside Blender. This was particularly frustrating when I was looking
at tutorials for creating UVs and setting them up as UDIMs, but videos I've found so far haven't
been at all helpful. There was one that was offsetting the UV islands by 256px, so half the islands
were off the UV square and just hanging out in empty space. Not helpful. I think what I'll end up
trying is breaking my models into different elements so I can create UDIMs that way. I need the
resolution and there's no way I'm going to get HD textures by having everything crammed onto a
single map, even if I work with 4K.

Ahh, the joys of content creation! lol

Lots of hugs to you, Mel! :huggle: I'm sending you warm thoughts and happy vibes. The snow
needs to bugger off and give you a break!
Reply
:iconikke46:
Ikke46 Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2019
She looks amazing, and that hair is out of this world!!
Great postwork on the tattoos!! Hugs for you Mel!! :hug: :hug:
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2019
Thank you so much Rian! :hug:
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:iconikke46:
Ikke46 Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2019
Reply
:iconbornangelauthor:
BornAngelAuthor Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2019  Hobbyist Artist
oh wow! Love that song, always have. This picture is fantastic! I love everything about it.
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2019
Glad you love it...it is great. :D  Thank you so much. :hug:
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:iconbornangelauthor:
BornAngelAuthor Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2019  Hobbyist Artist
you're welcome :)
Reply
:iconrov65:
Rov65 Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2019  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Very intriguing character Mel! It's like she is looking right true you into the bottom of your soul. One of the first things I noticed was the attention to detail as for the bracelet and strings. It's what makes you stand out far from the crowd :-)
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:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2019
awwww, wish I could hug you right now.  I need all the hugs I can get. lol 
Reply
:iconwodkatonic:
WODKATONIC Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2019
Beautiful!
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2019
Thank you! :)
Reply
:icontenen71:
tenen71 Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2019
I always admired as you work with characters!
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:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2019
Thank you so much. :hug:
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:icontenen71:
tenen71 Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2019
My pleasure! :) (Smile)
Reply
:iconcandy-l-lan:
Candy-L-Lan Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2019  Hobbyist Artist
Exquisite beauty, I love everything about this, the attitude, the power
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2019
Thank you Candy...you nailed it. :D
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:icon0snow-white0:
0Snow-White0 Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2019  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Top notch work as always !!
And, as Stoper said, stay strong hon! :hug:
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2019
Thank you so much Julia...everything takes time. :hug:
Reply
:iconechidnaean:
Echidnaean Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2019  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Powerful portrait :)
Reply
:iconblacktalonarts:
BlackTalonArts Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2019
Thank you!
Reply
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