BHS Blogress Report: 2016, Week 46 - Coming Out

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  • Tasakeru Book II Chapter 6: 4 pages done
  • Shattered Skies Chapter 22: 5.5 pages done
  • Photo projects: Effects/background

I'm asexual.

Please don't misunderstand me: I'm not publicly outing myself as some kind of misguided plea for attention, nor am I intending to reinvent myself as the Asexuality Poster Boy. I'm doing this because it feels right.

Since there's so much misinformation out there, let me make this clear: it's not that I don't have any interest in sex. It's not that I don't want a relationship, a partner and/or a family... I'd still be happy to go down that road if it was with the right person. All I'm saying is that as of recently, sex and relationships are no longer driving forces in my life. I would much rather devote myself to creating, to my writing and art and music, than expend God knows how much energy to find and hold down a significant other.

This year has seen me take on a serious effort to both improve myself and know myself better. For a long time now, I've been doing research on the asexuality spectrum, and much of what I found has this... resonance. Even during my teenage years, I was never all that interested in dating, relationships, or sex. The few relationships I have had were never physical, more like close friendships than SOs. Finding "that someone", aside from a few fumblings here and there, has never been a priority.

So now, after spending several months mulling it over, I've decided to come out and accept that this is who I am.

Why now? Well, I'd be lying if I said the state of current events didn't have anything to do with it. All the minority communities in the US are terrified, and for damned good reason: we're heading into what will likely be some dark and ugly times. I feel like now is the time to take pride in who and what you are, to prove to the world that bigotry doesn't control you and doesn't define you. Don't give me crap about me being "brave", because that's not it at all. I'm not trying to fish for praise, I just want to do what I think is right, and be a decent person.

Heaven knows we need all the basic decency we can get right now.

So. Other news. I've completed another song for the Tasakeru soundtrack. You can find it on the Music page, it's called "Autumn Afternoon". I actually wrote the melody some time ago, a few years I think, and only started thinking about it again a few days ago. It's something quiet and mellow and calming, I think... which, again, we really need right now.

The magical girl photo project has officially entered Phase 2. I've taken all the shots I need for it... now I need to work on the special effects and background. I should be on track to finish it by the end of the year, I hope.

Chapter 22 of Shattered Skies is well underway. I decided to take the Tsubomi/Erika scene out and make it its own chapter to provide a much-needed uplift... the rest of it is progressing nicely, so I should have an update ready in the next week or so.

And two nights ago I got my mind off of current events in probably the best way possible. My family and I attended a high school production of A Midsummer Night's Dream, starring two of the neighborhood kids as Demetrius and Lysander. I'm a bit of a Shakespeare nerd, so I went in expecting to be critical... but the kids gave a performance that actually rivals quite a few professional Shakespeare actors I've seen. Everyone was 100% on point and perfectly cast, they had the timing and the rhythms of the dialogue down flawlessly, and they even managed to keep going with a scene in the dark during a brief outage of the house lights, without missing a single beat! As I said to a few people in the audience: if Shakespeare is played the right way, the story should shine through whether or not you understand all the language. This production passed that test with flying colors. What an incredible night, I'm so glad I went.

Anyway. Keep on keeping on, everyone.

- BHS

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NeoChandler's avatar
*sees the paragraph involving Shakespeare play*

Mother of Euphoria..